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March 28, 2024, 06:55:53 PM

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The next Speaker of the House of Commons

Started by Noonling, October 28, 2019, 04:30:04 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

AUGHDUUUUUUUUURGH

Sir Lindsay Hoyle
9 (33.3%)
Harriet Harman
1 (3.7%)
Dame Eleanor Laing
0 (0%)
Chris Bryant
0 (0%)
Sir Edward Leigh
0 (0%)
Dame Rosie Winterton
0 (0%)
Shailesh Vara
0 (0%)
Sir Henry Bellingham
0 (0%)
Meg Hillier
0 (0%)
Raoul Moat
9 (33.3%)
Geoff Capes
3 (11.1%)
Terry Nutkins
1 (3.7%)
David Bellamy
1 (3.7%)
Mike Morris
1 (3.7%)
Björn Ulvaeus
0 (0%)
Tuppence Middleton
2 (7.4%)
Vagina Oldham
0 (0%)
Irving Nattrass
0 (0%)
John Cunt
0 (0%)

Total Members Voted: 27

Noonling

I know how a certain someone loves threads being separated, and would probably marry a separate thread if it was legal... So I present to you one that is only tangentially related to Brexit.

Our Lord and Saviour Mr John Bercow is stepping down on 31st, to be replaced by one of these dingbats:

  • Sir Lindsay Hoyle - Labour - 4/9 (place your bets now)
  • Harriet Harman - Labour - 7/2
  • Dame Eleanor Laing - Tory - 8/1
  • Chris Bryant - Labour - 16/1
  • Sir Edward Leigh - Tory - 33/1
  • Dame Rosie Winterton - Labour
  • Shailesh Vara - Tory
  • Sir Henry Bellingham - Tory
  • Meg Hillier - Labour

According to William Hill those last four are unlikely enough that its "Others on request" - even though it lists Rees-Mogg as 50/1. Not sure I trust the established William Hill at all though, considering John Bercow is listed as next Prime Minister at 10/1.


It will probably be Harriet. Her stern headmistress shtick will be a good foil for Boris and his naughty schoolboy gang. It's the perfect sitcom.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

That would be tiresome as fuck if Harman gets it.

Chris Bryant gets my vote as he has a decent sense of humour.

Pijlstaart

Hoyle is the funniest sounding, I'd love to steal flat caps from his washing line and have him chase me across a fen. Gorgeous simple toby jug creature, he goes to harvester multiple times a week. Think he's historically been slightly over-tory though, so very much a heart over head decision.

Whoever it is, I hope they can finally put a stop to all the jeering and catcalling. Wahey-hey-hey, oi oi oi, ho ho. They sound like a bunch of drunkards. And you sometimes see them falling asleep on the benches. Just dozing off. Yeah, I'm gonna have a little nap now. Because I don't fucking care, do I.

The government is a complete joke. I would give the job to Timmy Mallett.

Fambo Number Mive

If we get a Labour speaker, wont that meant the number of Labour Mps is reduced by one in any vote? Given the government has a minority of minus 42 or something, not sure how much that matters.

Really I don't think the Speaker should be an MP. It should be a separate job which you apply for.

Noonling

Quote from: Default to the negative on October 28, 2019, 06:42:33 PM
The government is a complete joke. I would give the job to Timmy Mallett.

He's 100/1

Quote from: Fambo Number Mive on October 28, 2019, 06:42:44 PM
Really I don't think the Speaker should be an MP. It should be a separate job which you apply for.

Yeah I don't think it makes much sense as it currently stands, you come with so much baggage as an MP, previous loyalties and so on.

Sebastian Cobb

MP's isn't a great system admittedly, but how would you ensure it's impartial? I'm sure civil servants have vested interests.

The job seems like a bit of a thankless task. So you have to ask why someone would want to do it.


Quote from: Sebastian Cobb on October 28, 2019, 06:51:59 PM
The job seems like a bit of a thankless task. So you have to ask why someone would want to do it.

John Bercow seems like a massive attention-seeker. That's probably why he took the job. As Speaker you are literally front and centre.

NoSleep

I hear rumours that Harman is due to be deselected. How do her chances fare in those circumstances?

Very well, if we all band together and make it happen. HARMAN'S HEROES

pigamus

So what's Lindsay Hoyle actually like? Is he any good?

Quote from: pigamus on October 28, 2019, 07:22:12 PM
So what's Lindsay Hoyle actually like? Is he any good?

His Live at the Apollo set was weak and lazy, but he's surely improved since then. Hopefully he put that facile observational comedy behind him, and has sharpened up enough to have some proper cheeky banter with Boris and the boys.

Elderly Sumo Prophecy

Which one is best at saying the word "order" in a silly voice?


olliebean

Quote from: Fambo Number Mive on October 28, 2019, 06:42:44 PM
If we get a Labour speaker, wont that meant the number of Labour Mps is reduced by one in any vote? Given the government has a minority of minus 42 or something, not sure how much that matters.

Really I don't think the Speaker should be an MP. It should be a separate job which you apply for.

The three deputy Speakers (one from the same party, and two from the opposite party) don't vote either, so it evens out. Also, when the Speaker is elected, they are supposed to completely disavow their former party and be impartial for ever more (even after they retire, if they go to the Lords). Doesn't apply to the deputies, though.

Right. Got to have four speakers for surround sound.

Feel like it's always me who has to pick up the slack on these ones, think some of you need to roll your sleeves up.

Butchers Blind

Whoever gets to be speaker, as long as they're issued with a tazer, I'm fine with it.

Sebastian Cobb

Give it to Jess Philips, it'd stop her damaging the labour party from within, give her the attention she obviously craves and a way to make everything about her; she's obviously got the 'gobshite' credentials.

imitationleather

Quote from: Sebastian Cobb on October 29, 2019, 11:59:23 AM
Give it to Jess Philips, it'd stop her damaging the labour party from within, give her the attention she obviously craves and a way to make everything about her; she's obviously got the 'gobshite' credentials.

But she's always going on (i.e lying) about how she doesn't understand Parliamentary procedures because she's so down to earth and one of us.


Sebastian Cobb

Or David Baddiel, like in them monkey dust sketches.

Dr Rock

Danny Dyer. He's bring his cockney charm and wouldn't stand for any nonsense. I'm not sure how familiar he is with Erskine-May, but I'm sure he'll give it 110%

pancreas


Quote from: Sebastian Cobb on October 29, 2019, 11:59:23 AM
Give it to Jess Philips, it'd stop her damaging the labour party from within, give her the attention she obviously craves and a way to make everything about her; she's obviously got the 'gobshite' credentials.

Too much hiss and distortion.

Blue Jam

Quote from: Pijlstaart on October 28, 2019, 06:36:23 PM
Hoyle is the funniest sounding, I'd love to steal flat caps from his washing line and have him chase me across a fen.



HONK

oy vey

Jabob Rees-Mogg Moogish ramble on the speaker change

Quote"My role would be to support the new Speaker in coming to a consensus on what the Speaker's discretion should be. The Speaker is a very powerful umpire, but it is not for the Speaker to determine one way or another which way things are going. But for the rules to be applied, the Speaker needs to know what those rules are."

Prepare for the neutering.

A non-MP discussed above makes sense.

NoSleep

I don't necessarily think it's safe for the Speaker not to be an MP. An MP will definitely have to check their own bias whereas a non-MP is not going to be any less biased if they are qualified to take the job. It could be more dangerous politically. Also, currently, the Speaker is somebody who people voted for as an MP somewhere in the UK, so how are we going to vote for the Speaker in the future were they not to be an MP?