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playground modifications to pop songs.

Started by Absorb the anus burn, November 03, 2019, 02:39:15 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Gulftastic

And now we're solid....solid as my cock.

beanheadmcginty

Up above the streets and houses
Bungle's flying high
He opens up his furry arse
And squirts out shepherd's pie.

non capisco

#92
^ In the version I knew the ingrate Bungle opened up his furry arse and defecated directly into his selfless human benefactor's eye. "Squirts out shepherd's pie" is perhaps a more disquieting visceral image though. Presumably in that case potato was somehow being filtered out of his anus along with the faecal mince. "Stitch that, streets and houses" the mysteriously airborne Bungle thinks as his twitching ursine aris unloads another liquid flood of mashed spuds and bear shit all over the homes and heads of blithe waving innocents. Shooting stars never stop, even when they reach the top.

Sebastian Cobb

Quote from: buzby on November 07, 2019, 12:43:31 PM
One of my old managers at Kwiksave used to sing
"Last Christmas, I gave you my length
Now the baby is due on September the tenth
This year, to save me from tears
I'm going to wear a condom"

We three kings from leamington spa one in a taxi, one in a car

fuck, can't remember the dirty bit

Dannyhood91

It's tragedy
When your mum goes it bed with uncle fred
It's tragedy



I remember some wag in my class singing Mambo Number 5, but using the first names of other boys mums in the lyrics.

MiddleRabbit

Quote from: beanheadmcginty on November 08, 2019, 10:06:42 PM
Up above the streets and houses
Bungle's flying high
He opens up his furry arse
And squirts out shepherd's pie.

Outstanding in all respects.

Captain Z

Quote from: Artie Fufkin on November 07, 2019, 12:05:20 PM
I sucked off Uncle Travelling Matt, he was very hairy

Is this to 'I shot the sheriff' or 'I saw the sign'? Either way it doesn't scan.

idunnosomename

Quote from: Sebastian Cobb on November 08, 2019, 10:30:59 PM
We three kings from leamington spa one in a taxi, one in a car

fuck, can't remember the dirty bit
one on a scooter peeping his hooter
While ramming your dear ma'maa

beanheadmcginty

No no. No no no no. No no no no. No no there's no lyrics.

Twed

Quote from: beanheadmcginty on November 09, 2019, 01:58:36 AM
No no. No no no no. No no no no. No no there's no lyrics.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8mST4PIWV7Y

I made "There's No Lager" popular in my form group at school around 1995.

Artie Fufkin

Quote from: Captain Z on November 09, 2019, 12:38:16 AM
Is this to 'I shot the sheriff' or 'I saw the sign'? Either way it doesn't scan.
LOLZ

I saw 3 ships come sailing in, maybe?

I sucked of Uncle Travelling Matt, Travelling Matt, Travelling Matt.
I sucked off Uncle Travelling Matt.
He was very hairy !

DrGreggles

Quote from: beanheadmcginty on November 08, 2019, 10:06:42 PM
Up above the streets and houses
Bungle's flying high
He opens up his furry arse
And squirts out shepherd's pie.

The last line was always "and shits in Geoffrey's eye" in my neck of the woods.

jobotic

Quote from: Artie Fufkin on November 11, 2019, 09:18:04 AM
LOLZ

I saw 3 ships come sailing in, maybe?

I sucked of Uncle Travelling Matt, Travelling Matt, Travelling Matt.
I sucked off Uncle Travelling Matt.
He was very hairy !

Every year I make myself laugh by singing "I saw three ships come sailing in....on Christmas Day, it was boring".

It's not even rude.

Twed



Have loads of these. To be fair more mid-twenties alcoholic sharehouse than playground.

I've a diiiick!
It's an erection.
And I'm loooooosing control.
Massive weiner, you're supplyin'
IT'S A MASSIVE WEINER!!!

I like how it abandons the rhyming scheme so casually.

To the tune of Because the Night:

Look at his balls!
They're in a scrotum
Look at his balls!
They're in a sa-ack.

And this perennial favourite:

Peg me with your strap-on dick!
Peg me, peg me!
Peg me slowly - peg me quick!
Peg me, peg me, peg me!


Pseudopath

Quote from: Sebastian Cobb on November 08, 2019, 10:30:59 PM
We three kings from leamington spa one in a taxi, one in a car

fuck, can't remember the dirty bit

Didn't it conclude "One on a scooter blowing his hooter following Ringo Starr"?

Icehaven

Quote from: DrGreggles on November 11, 2019, 09:31:49 AM
The last line was always "and shits in Geoffrey's eye" in my neck of the woods.
Yeah ours was
"Up above the streets and houses
Bungle's flying high
Geoffrey sticks his head out the window
(blow raspberry) in Geoffrey's eye.
Paint the whole world with a paintbruuuush."

Gulftastic

While shepherds washed their socks by night all watching ITV
The angel of the lord came down and switched to BBC.

non capisco

Quote from: boki on November 04, 2019, 12:27:05 PM
So here it is, Merry Christmas!
Everybody's had your mum.
We couldn't help ourselves,
She loves it up the bu-u-uuum.


Quote from: beanheadmcginty on November 05, 2019, 10:13:50 PM
Sheryl Crowe:

All I wanna do is shag your mum
I've got a feeling I'm not the only one

I'm afraid I'm still laughing at these two.

Artie Fufkin

Quote from: Gulftastic on November 21, 2019, 07:19:53 PM
While shepherds washed their socks by night all watching ITV
The angel of the lord came down and switched to BBC.

A colleague of mine and I make up versions of this all the time at work.
My favourite so far;

While shepherds watched their flocks by night
And also their lovely horses
The angel of DEATH appeared
And felated their loved one's corpses!

I have more....

Berthas Fat Leg

Manfred Mann - 5–4-3-2-1

5-4-3-2-1,
My grandad had a gun,
He shot my granny in the fanny,
5-4-3-2-1

beanheadmcginty

I'm Popeye the sailor man
I live in a caravan
There's a hole in the middle
Where I take a piddle
I'm Popeye the sailor man


JesusAndYourBush

He's Popeye the sailor man,
He lives in an old tin can,
He slept with his granny,
And twiddled* her fanny,
He's Popeye the sailor man.


* or tickled, in some versions.

idunnosomename

The Vengabus is coming
And everybody's bumming

I think that was it really

Catalogue Trousers

Adam and Joe had a bash at that - something along the lines of -

QuoteThe Vengabus is coming
The blokes on board are bumming
Each other up the plumbing
It's really quite becoming

The Vengabus is skidding
The driver's done his lid in
Disaster is the statement
The wheels mounting the pavement

The Vengabus is crashing
The heads inside are smashing
They'll need a load of plaster
For this fucking disaster

The Vengabus is dying
The band outside are crying
They'll make no more recordings
The public are applauding...

Schnapple

Quote from: non capisco on November 21, 2019, 08:10:33 PM
I'm afraid I'm still laughing at these two.

Yeah, I keep remembering these and ending up in honest hysterics.

SteK

One I remember, to the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody. Well, part of it...

Mama, just killed a man
Put my bum up to his head
Blew a fart and now he's dead.