Author Topic: Richard Branson TELL YOUR TOILETS TO SHUT UP  (Read 1041 times)

Zetetic

  • Burying isn't the same as killing.
Re: Richard Branson TELL YOUR TOILETS TO SHUT UP
« Reply #30 on: November 08, 2019, 08:44:21 PM »
Anyone who writes about toilets on Voyagers and Super Voyagers without mentioning that THE TRAINS COOK THE FUCKING SEWAGE is deeply suspect.

Please stop pretending this is okay.

Re: Richard Branson TELL YOUR TOILETS TO SHUT UP
« Reply #31 on: November 08, 2019, 08:46:48 PM »
It's there to deter you from having a wank.
i have an anthropomorphic toilet fetish

H-O-W-L

  • Turn me on, yeah. Electric bill all over.
Re: Richard Branson TELL YOUR TOILETS TO SHUT UP
« Reply #32 on: November 08, 2019, 10:32:53 PM »
Hullo! Peter Sutcliffe here!

Re: Richard Branson TELL YOUR TOILETS TO SHUT UP
« Reply #33 on: November 08, 2019, 10:39:32 PM »
So what will happen to the carraiges with the talking toilets once Virgin loses the franchise? Will they be sold to the new franchise owner? If so I'm presuming there is a way to stop the toilets talking?

Perhaps there should be a horror film about a talking toilet on a train which comes alive and starts eating people.

Late stage capitalism mate, that bog could be used for paying customers. Wear an adult nappy like the Chinese do on long journeys.

Re: Richard Branson TELL YOUR TOILETS TO SHUT UP
« Reply #34 on: November 08, 2019, 10:59:21 PM »
Hullo! Peter Sutcliffe here!
OI SEE YOU NEED A DUMP IN ME
SHIT IN MY GULLET


BUT NO TAMPONS!!!

Gurke and Hare

  • Fold water. Roll into small cubes.
Re: Richard Branson TELL YOUR TOILETS TO SHUT UP
« Reply #35 on: November 08, 2019, 11:47:57 PM »
So what will happen to the carraiges with the talking toilets once Virgin loses the franchise? Will they be sold to the new franchise owner? If so I'm presuming there is a way to stop the toilets talking?

Serious answer: Virgin don't own the trains, no TOC does. They're all leased from companies specially set up when the railway was privatised to act as rentiers, so the new TOC will start renting the same trains that Virgin does now. No idea if the bogs will still talk.

Bennett Brauer

  • I'm not "likeable"
Re: Richard Branson TELL YOUR TOILETS TO SHUT UP
« Reply #36 on: November 08, 2019, 11:54:58 PM »
Isn't it obvious that the Talkie ToiletTM
No! It's the Potty Mouth®.

Apparently you can tell when it's blocked because it starts talking Welsh.

Re: Richard Branson TELL YOUR TOILETS TO SHUT UP
« Reply #37 on: November 09, 2019, 12:58:30 AM »
Serious answer: Virgin don't own the trains, no TOC does. They're all leased from companies specially set up when the railway was privatised to act as rentiers, so the new TOC will start renting the same trains that Virgin does now. No idea if the bogs will still talk.
theyll have to rebrand them and hopefully theyll get rid of the Innocent smoothie shit in the bogs rather than try to replicate it

Glebe

  • Swear fealty to your Goose King!

Johnny Yesno

  • Injecting the rivers with stainless steel fish
    • Lines Horizontal
Re: Richard Branson TELL YOUR TOILETS TO SHUT UP
« Reply #39 on: November 09, 2019, 07:59:31 AM »
Plus on a moving train where they gonna hide?

In the toilet, of course.

a duncandisorderly

  • the rough and tumble of the internet
Re: Richard Branson TELL YOUR TOILETS TO SHUT UP
« Reply #40 on: November 09, 2019, 09:12:17 AM »
Awful as fuck though that is, I was always able to amuse myself thinking about the poor sucker of an actor who had to go into a sound booth with that script.

should've been terry wogan, from what I hear about his paid-for proclivities involving cling-film. I'm guessing most people would hold it in rather than hear that.

talking bogs- get to fuck.

Blue Jam

  • AM NO A GRASS
Re: Richard Branson TELL YOUR TOILETS TO SHUT UP
« Reply #41 on: November 09, 2019, 09:45:16 AM »
HI THIS IS PRESIDENT DONALD DUMP AND I GOTTA SAY I WILL GRAB YOU BY THE PUSSY SO HARD IF YOU TRY TO FLUSH A TAMPON DOWN ME

Quite right, we all know he prefers a nice bit of piss.

Blue Jam

  • AM NO A GRASS
Re: Richard Branson TELL YOUR TOILETS TO SHUT UP
« Reply #42 on: November 09, 2019, 09:46:11 AM »
This thread needs some buzby. I would love to know buzby's thoughts on talking toilets.

a duncandisorderly

  • the rough and tumble of the internet
Re: Richard Branson TELL YOUR TOILETS TO SHUT UP
« Reply #43 on: November 09, 2019, 10:39:32 AM »
something something talking into y'r arse....

Blue Jam

  • AM NO A GRASS
Re: Richard Branson TELL YOUR TOILETS TO SHUT UP
« Reply #44 on: November 09, 2019, 10:50:29 AM »
hopefully theyll get rid of the Innocent smoothie shit in the bogs

Could be difficult, Innocent smoothies are high in fibre.

Re: Richard Branson TELL YOUR TOILETS TO SHUT UP
« Reply #45 on: November 09, 2019, 11:14:20 AM »
HELLO! IT'S ME! YOUR STOOL! I'm nice and firm because I'm full of YUMMY fibre. Flush me daddy! Flush me! Oh yes! Yes! Harder! FUCK ME IM A TURD

Re: Richard Branson TELL YOUR TOILETS TO SHUT UP
« Reply #46 on: November 09, 2019, 11:51:45 AM »
Hi! It's me! The lingering stench of the last person to use this toilet! My smell is in the air, and my diseases are all over the handles. What what!