Richard Branson TELL YOUR TOILETS TO SHUT UP

[Zetetic]

Anyone who writes about toilets on Voyagers and Super Voyagers without mentioning that THE TRAINS COOK THE FUCKING SEWAGE is deeply suspect.

Please stop pretending this is okay.

[idunnosomename]

It's there to deter you from having a wank.

i have an anthropomorphic toilet fetish

[H-O-W-L]

Hullo! Peter Sutcliffe here!

[Sebastian Cobb]

So what will happen to the carraiges with the talking toilets once Virgin loses the franchise? Will they be sold to the new franchise owner? If so I'm presuming there is a way to stop the toilets talking?

Perhaps there should be a horror film about a talking toilet on a train which comes alive and starts eating people.

Late stage capitalism mate, that bog could be used for paying customers. Wear an adult nappy like the Chinese do on long journeys.

[idunnosomename]

Hullo! Peter Sutcliffe here!

OI SEE YOU NEED A DUMP IN ME
SHIT IN MY GULLET


BUT NO TAMPONS!!!

[Gurke and Hare]

So what will happen to the carraiges with the talking toilets once Virgin loses the franchise? Will they be sold to the new franchise owner? If so I'm presuming there is a way to stop the toilets talking?

Serious answer: Virgin don't own the trains, no TOC does. They're all leased from companies specially set up when the railway was privatised to act as rentiers, so the new TOC will start renting the same trains that Virgin does now. No idea if the bogs will still talk.

[Bennett Brauer]

Isn't it obvious that the Talkie Toilet^TM

No! It's the Potty Mouth^®.

Apparently you can tell when it's blocked because it starts talking Welsh.

[idunnosomename]

Serious answer: Virgin don't own the trains, no TOC does. They're all leased from companies specially set up when the railway was privatised to act as rentiers, so the new TOC will start renting the same trains that Virgin does now. No idea if the bogs will still talk.

theyll have to rebrand them and hopefully theyll get rid of the Innocent smoothie shit in the bogs rather than try to replicate it

[Glebe]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-79J6_j6KZI

[Johnny Yesno]

Plus on a moving train where they gonna hide?

In the toilet, of course.

[a duncandisorderly]

Awful as fuck though that is, I was always able to amuse myself thinking about the poor sucker of an actor who had to go into a sound booth with that script.

should've been terry wogan, from what I hear about his paid-for proclivities involving cling-film. I'm guessing most people would hold it in rather than hear that.

talking bogs- get to fuck.

[Blue Jam]

HI THIS IS PRESIDENT DONALD DUMP AND I GOTTA SAY I WILL GRAB YOU BY THE PUSSY SO HARD IF YOU TRY TO FLUSH A TAMPON DOWN ME

Quite right, we all know he prefers a nice bit of piss.

[Blue Jam]

This thread needs some buzby. I would love to know buzby's thoughts on talking toilets.

[a duncandisorderly]

something something talking into y'r arse....

[Blue Jam]

hopefully theyll get rid of the Innocent smoothie shit in the bogs

Could be difficult, Innocent smoothies are high in fibre.

[idunnosomename]

HELLO! IT'S ME! YOUR STOOL! I'm nice and firm because I'm full of YUMMY fibre. Flush me daddy! Flush me! Oh yes! Yes! Harder! FUCK ME IM A TURD

[littlefoot]

Hi! It's me! The lingering stench of the last person to use this toilet! My smell is in the air, and my diseases are all over the handles. What what!