Topic: First Class Worst Class

[king_tubby]

Had a great go on First Class a few years back. GNER as was, fiver more than standard for some reason. Got a free pie and mash and a free beer. On the way out the trolly dude gave us a four pack and a bottle of red cos they were left overs. Bonus.

[The Boston Crab]

I'm back on it today as I flee from rat city. Actually really nice place in factor in parts. I heard two employees of Sainsbury's Local talking about seeing a girl shit herself in a doorway but it's been great since then. Just remembered about the homeless guy though and now I feel less guilty because the bed was a lump piece of shit and the pillow was like a block of plasticine and I got a sore back from it. Truly insane to see how the other half live and its terrible.

[poo]

Does ANYONE remember Craigslist train wanks??? Feel like there’s a conspiracy and it’s been wiped from people’s memories by government chemicals but I am immune.

[Dex Sawash]

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Best first class moment was a Geordie guy clocking I don't usually go first class (it was paid for me) who wheeled the trolly forward and whispered in my ear: GWAN FELLER JUST TAKE WHATEVER YER FANCY

So I shagged him

[Blue Jam]

Went First Class on Eurostar once. Got a nice breakfast which consisted of peeled orange segments, grapefruit segments and other fruit with a bit of mascarpone on the side and a glass of Champagne. Very nice, but I bought the ticket for cheap from a mate who'd had to change his travel plans, and I'm not sure paying someone a bit extra to peel my citrus fruit segments would have been worth the full price of admission. I'm not Greta bloody Garbo.

[Blue Jam]

Only flown first class once- "Premium Business" which is what Chilean airline LAN used to call it (they have since merged with Brazilian airline TAM to form LATAM). Booked it by accident when me and Mr Jam had a trip to Santiago booked and then got a bit of a windfall and decided we'd spend it on a jaunt to Easter Island. Got the cheapest tickets then checked the confirmation email and found that by some pricing quirk we'd paid about £350 each for a five-hour first class flight on the muh'fuckin' Dreamliner. Get in...

It was amazing as well- nice comfy pods with back massagers in the seats, big tellies, complimentary socks and blankets and eye masks and pillahs, those polarised windows where you can control the tint with buttons, and proper nice food (Steaks On A Plane) with decent wine and proper metal cutlery and tiny white linen tablecloths.

The only bad thing was having kids from Economy wandering in to gawp at us like we were in some kind of posh people zoo- the ticket price should have covered the wages of a snooty concierge at least.

I bet BA isn't that good. I bet Air France is amazing though, judging by the quality of the sandwich I once had in Economy. That was the best sandwich of my life, I still dream about that sandwich. It had posh ham and two types of posh cheese and hazelnuts and it was even better than the Steaks On A Plane. I have tried to recreate that sandwich but the identity of Posh Cheese #2 eludes me.

[Blue Jam]

If you want my body and you think I'm sexy...

[shiftwork2]

I’ve had some overbooking upgrades on long haul flights and it’s a total sweetshop for the functioning alcoholic.   The BA lounges have a self service bar and you just mix whatever you like.  Fridges full of frosty beer, ice buckets chilling champagne.  You must rinse it.  Then on board it’s just endless offers of drink.  If you find yourself short there’s a little fridge you can just go and help yourself from.  Then you have a flat bed to sleep on and a shower and breakfast in the arrivals lounge if you want it. I’d never pay for it (even if I could afford it) but it is a much more pleasant way to burn your hours in the air.

[Ian Drunken Smurf]

Got upgraded on Austrian to Tokyo in 2015, and blew miles on return upgrade. Lounge at Hanada was v. Well stocked with Yamazaki so I had a good session. Did Dubai to Cape Town in business which was nice, as was Melbourne to Kuala Lumpur - both free upgrades.

[Dr Trouser]

As a one world alliance emerald member I don’t have to mix with any of the business class scum. I’m currently in BA Concorde first class lounge in Singapore. It is as ridiculous as you imagine.

[Better Midlands]

Might be a joke to you but it can be a fine of hundreds of £ which could leave a normal person desolate and turning to loan sharks and prostitution.

They can fine you when you "accidentally" sit in first class, but do nothing when you "accidentally" sit in someone's reserved seat

[H-O-W-L]

Was allowed to sit in First Class by a nice bloke on a train back from Bristol at six in the morning once because of my poorly guts. Would've been shit if I'd have paid though because there was no staff on so I didn't get offered a battered heron or egg 'n ham squirkles like you toffs do. Still comfy though.

[Phoenix Lazarus]

So. second's the best.   Would third be the squashed tomato?

[dr beat]

I bet BA isn't that good. I bet Air France is amazing though, judging by the quality of the sandwich I once had in Economy. That was the best sandwich of my life, I still dream about that sandwich. It had posh ham and two types of posh cheese and hazelnuts and it was even better than the Steaks On A Plane. I have tried to recreate that sandwich but the identity of Posh Cheese #2 eludes me.

BA Premium Economy is pretty decent and well worth the one or two hundred quid extra if you're flying long-haul.  Big seats, plenty of legroom, a bit of free fizz as you embark, proper metal cutlery and the food is a cut above.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

the one or two hundred quid extra

Flash cunt

[dr beat]

Got it in one.  I'm like your Sharon Stone; but wearing a Widnes Vikings novelty helmet.

Sleep well, I'm sure you will now ;)

[icehaven]

Sorry all two sided memes now have to be of an angry blonde woman and a cat, so this must be disregarded.

[FerriswheelBueller]

The closest I’ve come to first class (or anything that isn’t economy, now I think about it) is walking through the first class section in the plane on the way to cattle class.

Would love to give it a go. The cost of all my economy flights at super short notice must be at least equivalent to first class, if only my firm was a bit more organized.

[bgmnts]

The closest i've come to first class is being at Anfield watching Luis Suarez score a peach of a free kick against Man City.

Fucking prole I am.

[BlodwynPig]

As a one world alliance emerald member I don’t have to mix with any of the business class scum. I’m currently in BA Concorde first class lounge in Singapore. It is as ridiculous as you imagine.

Is that the one with a tropical jungle recreated just outside? I got invited by some diplomat into one there, amazing but fleeting. The lounge was good too

[Dr Trouser]

Is that the one with a tropical jungle recreated just outside? I got invited by some diplomat into one there, amazing but fleeting. The lounge was good too

No. This was super secret and not for diplomats.

Am currently in Heathrow BA first class lounge at the champagne bar.