If I was Mr Specsavers I would offer, along with anti-scratch coatings and UV protection, integrated supermarket aubergine stickers, like those pens when you tip them you see the lady's underthings, except supermarket aubergine stickers, and you could hum a tinny tune as if it was a new-fangled greetings card that played a tinny tune.
Actually I am not allowed within 30 metres of spectacles, it's what the court said, I'm sorry.