what exercise is good

[Cloud]

Beat Saber.  Splash out on a VR set with the two controllers (Oculus Quest for example) and enjoy.  Plus VR porn, obviously

[Twit 2]

Roast dinners!

Do star jumps as you prepare it, every now and then kneel down and shout at it all in the oven.

Canoes!

Pick a canoe up. They're well heavy. (Don't forget to place it back down when you've finished lifting it.)

Tugging!

Belt loops...cocks...o'war - you name it! Then tug it.

Limpopo Fart Barn!

Muck it out like you're Heracles, with a big broom.

Mr Pontipine!

You'll be run ragged looking after those little pontipines. The weight will fucking fall off you.

[good times]

Don't neglect weight lifting if you're trying to lose weight. You need to make sure you're burning fat not muscle and the weight lifting will help ensure this, even though it doesn't burn many calories.

This and count calories religiously - it might sound boring but it's really not that much effort with one of the various apps out there, and it makes weight loss a fairly simple mathematical challenge. It's quite satisfying when you see how the calorie deficit relates almost exactly to your weight loss (I've found that at least anyway).

You'll also quickly learn what shit you should avoid and the difference cutting down on portion sizes will make. Make sure you've got some kitchen scales to weigh pasta/rice etc.

Cardio will make you feel better and will keep your metabolism higher but it's not essential to lose weight, after all it will take you about 30 minutes to run off that Mars Bar you could just not eat instead. So it's massively time consuming as well as boring.

Final thing is make sure you eat plenty of protein as it will get you full and try to get your daily allowance of fat as this will help too.

[Dex Sawash]

Get on a rowing machine.

[Non Stop Dancer]

Don't neglect weight lifting if you're trying to lose weight. You need to make sure you're burning fat not muscle and the weight lifting will help ensure this, even though it doesn't burn many calories.

This and count calories religiously - it might sound boring but it's really not that much effort with one of the various apps out there, and it makes weight loss a fairly simple mathematical challenge. It's quite satisfying when you see how the calorie deficit relates almost exactly to your weight loss (I've found that at least anyway).

You'll also quickly learn what shit you should avoid and the difference cutting down on portion sizes will make. Make sure you've got some kitchen scales to weigh pasta/rice etc.

Cardio will make you feel better and will keep your metabolism higher but it's not essential to lose weight, after all it will take you about 30 minutes to run off that Mars Bar you could just not eat instead. So it's massively time consuming as well as boring.

Final thing is make sure you eat plenty of protein as it will get you full and try to get your daily allowance of fat as this will help too.

This x 100. Next time someone says they can't lose weight ask them how many calories they're consuming a day and how many they actually need. They won't even be able to tell you to the nearest ten thousand.

[peanutbutter]

Hate to say it but IMO, you can't really "do" yoga if you're not present and concentrating purely on the yoga.

How d'you mean? Do you mean some spiritual aspect? cos I don't give a shite about that side of it, I just don't want to be stiff.

I just wanna do yoga to Cum Town... :(

[Sin Agog]

In't Pontius Pilates supposed to be yoga for people who don't have a soul?

[pigamus]

Are there any ramblers on here?

[idunnosomename]

shit into a bath for a week then on sunday morning eat it all

[Lost Oliver]

Serious answer

Bike to work three days a week which is about 40 minutes in total
These exercises https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sWjTnBmCHTY though not for 45 seconds each, I just do 20 of each action
Press ups. Do about 50 now, started off just doing three
Dumbell curls, three sets of 15

I'm not in great shape because my diet is appalling but I'm okay and not embarassed to take my shirt off. That said, I have zero problem with nudity so that doesn't really mean anything.

I'd really recommend it to be honest. Start of slow and just keep adding bits every time. Ignoring the biking everything else takes me about 15 minutes a day which is nothing. I actually take longer arsing about, procrastinating before starting than I do actually exercising.

[poo]

high intensity botty snogs

[phantom_power]

Exercise is boring but sport is fun so maybe start playing a sport. There are lots that you can build up fitness in, like badminton or squash. You can join a club if you don't have any friends that want to play as well

[dallasman]

Is this fat fuck ever going to post an update on his progress? There's been many great bits of advice now.



Look at that hair, folks. Plain as vanilla.

[AsparagusTrevor]

Beat Saber.  Splash out on a VR set with the two controllers (Oculus Quest for example) and enjoy.  Plus VR porn, obviously

Beat Saber is fucking great exercise, as is the recently released Pistol Whipped. The Oculus Quest is also a good choice for exercise as there's no wires to worry about and it's fully portable so you can use it anywhere you have enough space.

I lost a bunch of weight myself over the past few years in a by massively cutting down on booze - I'd get through at least a crate of lager at the weekend without fail and now I sometimes go months without so much as a drop - plus cutting portion size slightly and doing a bit more walking and weights. I still eat what I want, just less of it. I never weighed myself at my fattest but I lost 16 inches on my waist. I was looking at some holiday photos earlier and, christ, I was a fat fuck.

I'm just pissed off that I was at my largest when I got married, and my wife won't let me Photoshop the wedding photos.