Have you been mucking about in my daughter’s fanny?

[touchingcloth]

We somehow haven't had a thread about this that I can see so far.

Rapper TI (I know the name, little else) has recently revealed that he takes his daughter for hymen checks to confirm her virginity, but there's nothing creepy about it because he's just protecting her from the non-romantic advances of "chubby-fingered boys", and protecting the dignity of himself and his household. He would be fine with his son sleeping around, because there would be no repercussions or impact if he happened to get someone pregnant.

28 years old, she is. Or will be in ten years' time.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Aren't most women's hymens already busted through various sources by then?

I know I am stating the obvious but that is some fucked up Uganda tier shit right there. We should check his arsehole for sodomy mushrooms.

[Blumf]

I assume the doctor just has a quick, half-hearted glance and shrugs, "Sure, she's still intact. You can pay the receptionist on the way out"

[Icehaven]

Many years ago my then boyfriend's sister and her husband had their first child, and they brought her over to meet all the family. As her Dad was lifting his week or two old daughter out of the car, his first words of introduction as he presented her to the waiting family were "Here she is, and she's never having a boyfriend, ever." Which I don't think struck any of the humour/performatively protective Dad notes he thought it did.

[touchingcloth]

Aren't most women's hymens already busted through various sources by then?

The sources are often chubby fingers, so he has a point, TI, you've got to give it to him, he got a reaction out of you.

[Dex Sawash]

I assume the doctor just has a quick, half-hearted glance and shrugs, "Sure, she's still intact. You can pay the receptionist on the way out"

You don't go to a "doctor" for this check

[imitationleather]

This all seems entirely fair enough to me.

[flotemysost]

This is on a par with with those horrifying ceremonies they have in the US where little girls pledge vows of chastity in the presence of their dads. Fucking cracking up at 'chubby fingered boys' though.

Aren't most women's hymens already busted through various sources by then?

As far as I know most hymens aren't a fully intact membrane from the get go, most have some sort of hole or opening in them, that's how menstrual blood gets out.

[Elderly Sumo Prophecy]

He didn't need to take her to a doctor to have this service performed, I'd have happily done it for nothing. In fact I would have payed him.

[Jittlebags]

Now then, now then, eurgh eurgh eurgh.

[Elderly Sumo Prophecy]

Now then, now then, eurgh eurgh eurgh.

She's over 18. No Savile.

[Blumf]

She's over 18 and not mental health in-patient. No Savile.

FTFY

[touchingcloth]

For those who haven't heard anything outside of this thread, this whole debacle started when TI appeared on the Women Like Us podcast, and in response to a question about whether he had talked about sex with his children he said:

Not only have we had the conversation, we have yearly trips to the gynaecologist to check her hymen. Yes, I go with her ... I will say, as of her 18th birthday, her hymen is still intact.

When the hosts brought up the fact that hymens aren't necessarily a great gauge of virginity due to among other things the range of ways they can be "broken", T had an answer:

So then they come and say, 'Well, I just want you to know that there are other ways besides sex that the hymen can be broken like bike riding, athletics, horseback riding and just other forms of athletic physical activity'. So I say, 'Look, Doc, she don't ride no horses, she don't ride no bike, she don't play no sports. Just check the hymen, please, and give me back my results expeditiously.'

If I'm honest, I find the needless semantic garnish of "expeditiously" to be every bit as distasteful as his interest in his daughter's junk.

When the backlash began he tried to clarify but ended up doubling down, and that's where the chubby finger talk came in:

I think that in the age or the time when our women—black women—are the most unprotected, unattended, disregarded women on the planet, I'm being criticized because I'm willing to go above and beyond to protect mine.

And I'm talking about all of the slimy, grimy, chubby-fingered little boys who want to just come and defile and destroy the sanctity that I have as a man. This is a physical urge. This is not an emotional romantic encounter for this gentleman.

Anything that is the most important thing to me in my life, I am going to deal with that with very extreme care. And I don't understand how that is looked at as being so wrong.

That's the doubling down, and the not at all misogynist as fuck clarification is:

I'm not there to necessarily protect her virginity. I just know that is a big move and once you make that move, there are things that happen and follow.

If my son goes out and gets a girl pregnant, how is the household changed for those nine months? The household is not necessarily changed for those nine months, whereas if my daughter come home, my household is changed immediately. So the stakes are higher.

TI: a great lunge at labs.

[Jim Bob]

Perhaps when this TI fella makes his yearly visits to the hospital with his daughter, he could have a CT scan done on his skull to see if a brain has yet formed within, or if he's still entirely boneheaded.

[Mobius]

Surely a slender fingered boy would be more suited to hymen breaking anyway. More nimble and agile. A big chubby finger would just sort of fumble its way around the outside bit of the fanny. Like when your phone buttons are too small.

[thenoise]

My friend went out with an Asian girl once who was so worried about virginity and marriage, she would only take it up the pooper. I'd imagine Ms TI does similar.

[H-O-W-L]

Peak deso.

[Buelligan]

Absolutely.  Patriarchy gone fucking mad. 

What's he going to do if the paid abuser "doctor" says it's broke?  This man needs hunting down by the maenads.

[Cardenio I]

Most recent attempt at backpedalling

"All of this surrounds a conversation that I was having in a very joking manner, when asked how do I deal with parenting in this day and age," TI real name Clifford Joseph Harris Jr, said.

Hilarious joke. Tell us the one about how you waterboard your wife next.

He added he began to "embellish and exaggerate" but said his words came from "a place of truth".

In other words it was true, but you have to admit the truth is stupid.

His wife Tameka 'Tiny' Cottle - who joined TI on the podcast - said the checks had happened when Deyjah was "15 or 16 years old at the time".

Sound, that's a perfectly legitimate age at which to have Dr. Nick Riviera staring up your cunt with a speculum and a headlamp so he can report back to Daddy on your purity.

"I never said that it was being done present day as an 18 year old," said TI.

Yes, yes you did. Explicitly.

[Default to the negative]

Frances Howard is an object lesson in what happens when we obsess over women's hymens.

Lady Frances Howard was married at the age of 14 to the 13-year-old Robert Devereux, 3rd Earl of Essex. The marriage was primarily a political union; they were separated after the wedding to prevent them from having intercourse, with the view that premature sex and pregnancy was to be avoided. Essex went on a European tour (from 1607 to 1609), and when he returned Frances made every effort to avoid him. He was at the time seriously ill with smallpox. She was at court and on 5 June 1610 danced as the "Nymph of Lee" representing the Essex River Lea in the masque Tethys' Festival. She had also fallen in love with Robert Carr, 1st Earl of Somerset. When she finally took the step of annulment, unable to legally represent herself, her father and her uncle, Henry Howard, Earl of Northampton, represented her and drew up the libel. The situation quickly attracted public attention, and was widely observed by those with "prurient minds". She claimed that she had made every attempt to be sexually compliant for her husband, and that, through no fault of her own, she was still a virgin. She was examined by ten matrons and two midwives who found her hymen intact. It was widely rumoured at the time that Sir Thomas Monson's daughter was a substitute, which is possible because she had requested to be veiled during the examination "for modesty's sake".

She then grew up to be a famous murderess.

[drummersaredeaf]

"Daddy... We need to have a serious conversation... I've been... Riding a bike..."

[Dr Trouser]

Pretty sure Catherine the Great broke her hymen horseriding, so there is an historical precedent.

[madhair60]

Uh, hey T.I, don't you think this is T.M.I? Haha! Seriously though not seeing a problem with this.

[Cuellar]

Demented level shit - cunt should be in prison.

[bgmnts]

Rapper in ridiculous misogyny shocker!

[TheBrownBottle]

I'm not sure it's possible to start with 'without wishing to be vulgar' on this thread, so I'll just ask the obvious:

Is TI aware that people can have sex up the bum too?  Or does this not count?

Answers on a postcard marked 'Does Bum Sex Count?' to the usual address

[bgmnts]

Bum sex doesn't count as losing virginity though.

[TheBrownBottle]

It might not to you - but I'm guessing that you're a well adjusted human being.

TI, on the other hand, sounds like an atavistic misogynistic lunatic.  He may view bum sex different from you.

[dissolute ocelot]

I can fit a hymen to your daughter's bum for $50,000 dollars.

[drummersaredeaf]

Is it todd proof?