Topic: Things You Recall What Boris Johnson Has Written

[Dr Rock]

As the public is forced to ingest yet another stream of hate and scorn that the current Prime Minister once spaffed out for The Spectator or the Telegraph, stripped of the context that would make the vicious spew clearly part of a message of hope and love if only people were to bother reading the whole thing, what other quotes are you sure you remember reading somewhere wrote or said by our cheeky scamp PM LolBol?

[Dr Rock]

Like this, from The Spectator, or possibly the Telegraph, from 1998 or six months ago -

'Nurses? Is there a more loathsome rabble than the British nurse? A veritable deformis imber stercore. Fat heffers, and smelly foreigners most of them, stealing from both the public purse and the patients handbags [...] ..speed forth the plough and fill the mass graves, and hurry forth the future of American-style private healthcare for all (except gypsies)'

[Bobloblawslawbomb]

Like this, from The Spectator, or possibly the Telegraph, from 1998 or six months ago -

'Nurses? Is there a more loathsome rabble than the British nurse? A veritable deformis imber stercore. Fat heffers, and smelly foreigners most of them, stealing from both the public purse and the patients handbags [...] ..speed forth the plough and fill the mass graves, and hurry forth the future of American-style private healthcare for all (except gypsies)'

Did you make that up?!

[Fambo Number Mive]

I don't remember reading his novel, but this is an interesting review

This assassination-massacre plan is stumbled on by Roger Barlow, a bicycling Tory MP known for tousled hair, classical allusions and flapping shirt-tails. As the story develops, he sees the chance to make himself such a global hero that the media will judge it futile to publish the latest thing he doesn’t want to tell his wife.

That subplot increased in intrigue when, within two months of hardback publication, Johnson was sacked from the shadow cabinet after the Tory leader, Michael Howard, judged him to have lied to the party and public about an extramarital affair. Reread now, it’s striking that Barlow’s view – that public value should make private conduct irrelevant – is one the writer has continued to embrace through domestic troubles up to and including last month’s publication in the Guardian of details of a row between Johnson and his partner, Carrie Symonds...

Most strikingly from an author born in New York, and who has expressed admiration for Donald Trump, the book is relentlessly anti-American, repeatedly describing the UK-US “special relationship” as a farce. This is because Johnson, at the time of writing, was advocating, as a journalist, the prosecution for war crimes in Iraq of Tony Blair and George W Bush, who is clearly the president in the novel, although never named, perhaps because the publishers worried about the tastefulness of depicting a serving leader as a victim of terrorist violence. For reasons unclear, Johnson even twice breaks the flow to have a go at Sierra Leone...

https://www.theguardian.com/books/2019/jul/17/boris-johnson-seventy-two-virgins-novel

[ajsmith2]

My Mum used to read The Telegraph (she’s switched to the Guardian now fwiw) and I recall being over hers at New Years 2013 and us passing around Johnson’s round up of events of 2012 in said Torygraph, in which he recounted the popularity of Gangnam Style, and how at least one attempt at recreating the dance in a British household had led to a fatality that year due to over exertion, before cheerfully adding how he was sure that ‘I’m sure many more deaths will be caused by this dance in the new year across the nation’ or words to that effect. Maybe I’m a snowflake who just doesn’t get the Bullingdon sense of humour, but was that meant to be a joke? I mean I know his whole thing is being a big toffy cad, but such unconcealed glee and amused anticipation at the prospect of many more proles meeting their early deaths while performing their silly little dances was so blatant it went beyond tasteless into the truly inhumanly odd to me. I know, I know, I shouldn’t be surprised but it sticks in my mind as not only being heartless but also a deeply weird thing to say. Like an alien forensicly observing humans dying from a telescope or something, and then attempting a knowing joke about it in what it imagines is perfect earthling language but getting the nuances all wrong.

[popcorn]

Apparently today he's tweeted a thread of insight about legal issues surrounding the London Bridge attacker that are simply lifted from the Secret Barrister blog.

[Dr Rock]

Did you make that up?!

If only my Latin was that immaculate.

[Cerys]

‘I’m sure many more deaths will be caused by this dunce in the new year across the nation'

In the event of a Tory win ... ftfy.

[touchingcloth]

I am wanking WAHA such much ahar um ah haha well piccanninnies I am wanking I am well well well well uhm letterbox.

Written July '77 in his Eton entrance exam, where he got a B.

[Default to the negative]

This is a good article about it: https://www.newstatesman.com/politics/uk/2019/06/boris-johnson-s-racist-insults-dog-whistles-and-slurs


The highlights:

1. Calling women wearing the burqa “letter boxes” and “bank robbers”

2. Palling around with Steve Bannon

3. Writing a poem about the Turkish President having sex with a goat

4. Dismissing “part-Kenyan” Barack Obama’s views on Britain

5. Describing Commonwealth citizens as “piccaninnies” with “watermelon smiles”

6. Calling Papua New Guinea a country with “orgies of cannibalism and chief-killing”

7. Championing cheaper alcohol – in a speech at a Sikh temple

8. Joking about “dead bodies” in Libya

9. Failing to secure the release of Nazanin Zaghari-Ratcliffe from Iran after mistakenly referring to her “teaching people journalism”

10. Calling Africa “that country”

11. Reciting a colonial-era poem at a sacred Buddhist site in Myanmar

12. Comparing the EU to Hitler

13. Calling gay men “tank-topped bumboys”

14. Comparing gay marriage to bestiality

15. Criticising the “appalling agenda” of “teaching homosexuality in schools”

16. Declaring that voting Tory will give your wife “bigger breasts”

17. Saying Malaysian women go to university to “find men to marry”

18. Advising the next Spectator editor to “pat her [the publisher] on the bottom and send her on her way”

19. Suggesting the best way of honouring the memory of the murdered MP Jo Cox is to get Brexit done

But you have to admit, Boris is a bit of a laugh isn't he?

[idunnosomename]

Thing is that his Spectator/Telegraph colonial racism is clearly "ironic", but that's just as bad if not much worse as Corbyn saying things about Israel and the Palestinians as an activist MP that in retrospect can be construed as antisemitic.

He certainly did it a lot more often. But then journalists are above reproach for sewing seeds of division and prejudice aren't they

[Dr Rock]

"What a blighted nuisance it is to the Mayor attempting to hurry to his Mayoral duties (as the slightly touched pole-dancing Yank likes being called), is the stick-waving epsilon, the scopum ex odio, the total cunt that is the 'Lollipop Lady.'

Ferrying urchins who'd be better off up chimneys across to the schools where all they will learn is how to stab each other (these children were blackies you see), the impudent strumpet with her smiling face hiding obvious contempt and naked jealousy towards the very important man from Eton - a face that will not be smiling should her effigy be found guts-out underneath the very important man's wine crate bus later that evening. And as her final gasps of pain leave her broken body, open wide your gaping maw for the last thing you shall imbibe, the yellow drizzle of your Master's rain-maker''

Letters page, Lollipop Lady Gazette, 2004.

[poodlefaker]

It's odd the way this shocking stuff from his old columns keeps dribbling out. Any journalist with access to a couple of online archives could find it all in a few minutes. I guess it doesn't harm in the eyes of his supporters, so it's not worth it.

A media type on another board I read says there is a massive story about Johnson's personal life that every journalist knows about but the key person won't go public because four other people are involved. Anyone know  what this is?

[Cuellar]

Actually don't know if it's just worth removing this entirely.

(As requested)

[idunnosomename]

If "grab her by the pussy" didn't ruin trump, it's hard to see Johnson being finished off by a bit of old nig-nog shirtlifter banter

[thenoise]

I don't know if it's a good idea to repeat this here. Barry: please remove this if it is likely to cause you legal troubles.
For obvious reasons I can't reveal my source, but you will have to trust me: it come from someone who knows, and wants to remain anonymous.

SPOILER: Boris Johnson is a fat posh stupid cunt

[Panbaams]

A media type on another board I read says there is a massive story about Johnson's personal life that every journalist knows about but the key person won't go public because four other people are involved. Anyone know  what this is?

No idea, but I'd hazard a guess that the "four other people" are his children by Marina Wheeler.