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March 28, 2024, 09:34:38 AM

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Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake

Started by alan nagsworth, December 02, 2019, 07:52:44 AM

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alan nagsworth

I've been in Berlin with loads of mates this weekend for a gig one of them had organised. Night of the gig, I was exhausted, as it was running from 11PM to 11AM, and I'd been up since 4:30AM beforehand to catch my flight. Trying to have an afternoon nap is impossible when you're in an 8-person hostel dorm and the dorm next door is full of ragingly pissed European men screaming a broken English "Winter Wonderland" and literally hammering their fists against your wall. So in order to stay awake at this gig, instead of doing speed, which would have been the more sensible and sobering option, I decided to split a gram of coke with my pal. I mean, it worked, and resultantly I was up until about 10AM, but fuck me was I ever pissed. Absolutely annihilated. I'm at the point in my life where this sort of antic is deeply embarrassing to me. I hate myself for being this person with such terrible self control. Fortunately I was just a lumbering dinosaur and nothing too wretched happened during the several hours where my memory completely failed me, but going on holiday with all your friends for a gig you'd been anticipating for months and then not remembering about three quarters of the bastard thing ... ugh.

Anyway I probably would have slept perfectly fine unaided after that. 28 hours awake and dancing and chemically abusing my body is enough to put anybody out. Could've just passed out right wherever I was stood. But for some reason I decided to seal the deal and guarantee a completely uninterrupted sleep by taking half a Xanax, which I'd already been told was 'particularly strong'.

This was Saturday morning at 10AM.

I woke up at 8:30AM on Sunday.

Twenty two motherfucking hours.

I think on rare occasions I've probably slept for 12 hours or so in the past, but that's not been for a great many years. This is twice the length of any other sleep I've ever had in my entire life. And given the strength of the Xanax combined with the amount of booze in my system, I'm honestly probably quite lucky to be alive. If I'd taken the whole pill I'm not sure I would have been so lucky. My breathing must have been extremely shallow. I'm no scientist but I'm wondering if it's just the coke which kept me going? Either way, fucking hell. I'm glad I only learned that fact in the sober light of two days later, and not yesterday when my brain was a howling tangle of anxiety and depression and I could barely utter two words without feeling like I was going to throw up and have a panic attack, too scared to go back to the hostel and be alone but too fucked up to muster eating or drinking or engaging with everyone getting drunk around me. Sleeping forever is considerably worse than sleeping for 22 hours. But 22 hours is still pretty fucking long. Imagine if I had died there on that blue plastic single mattress in Germany in the middle of a weekend bender with about 30 mates. What a bummer!

BlodwynPig


Elderly Sumo Prophecy

I think you should give up your life of sin and accept the love of our Lord Jesus, lest you wish to burn in the lake of hell fire for all eternity.

Glebe


seepage

"... it means we'll miss out Saturday but come up smiling Sunday"

alan nagsworth

Quote from: BlodwynPig on December 02, 2019, 07:55:17 AM
Some fucking mates

Snot really their fault. They're just as bad as me, often worse. We were all a twisted mess that night. It isn't their responsibility to monitor my own daft actions, especially not since at least one of them had done the same thing as me.

pupshaw

Quote from: alan nagsworth on December 02, 2019, 08:03:55 AM
Snot really their fault. They're just as bad as me, often worse. We were all a twisted mess that night. It isn't their responsibility to monitor my own daft actions, especially not since at least one of them had done the same thing as me.

Hard to see why you call them mates then

thugler

Definitely got to be careful with combining stuff with sleeping pills, but that doesn't sound all that bad. I've gotten not so far from that without meds once or twice just from seriously overdoing it on no sleep and a wretched flu. Berlin is fucking ace eh

Brundle-Fly

Have a word with yourself, Nagsy. You've got away with it but next time you might not be so lucky. By all means, go a bit mental on these weekends but don't wind up in a body bag for the sake of knees up in Germany.

alan nagsworth

Quote from: pupshaw on December 02, 2019, 08:49:20 AM
Hard to see why you call them mates then

Hark at you, knowing all the facts and that! Sure am glad there's total fuckin strangers like you weighing in on the social life I've shared and cherished with these wonderful folks for 10-15 years.

imitationleather

That Xanax must have contained something other than alprazolam. Very dodgy.

Sounds like it was a phat weekend. Shame I couldn't make it but I'd not enough money after going to Kosovo a couple o' weeks ago. Rave on.


madhair60


Chollis

Not seeing a massive problem with this

alan nagsworth

Quote from: Chollis on December 02, 2019, 10:07:07 AM
Not seeing a massive problem with this

Just thought it might brighten your day a bit mate

Piggyoioi

drug binge followed by crippling self hatred, sounds like a standard good weekend.

madhair60

Sleeping for 20+ hours sounds fucking great tbh.

BlodwynPig

Quote from: madhair60 on December 02, 2019, 10:31:56 AM
Sleeping for 20+ hours sounds fucking great tbh.

In that time, Queen dead, Trump assassinated, Corbyn victory, Corbyn assassination. You'd look a right doofus

pupshaw

Quote from: alan nagsworth on December 02, 2019, 09:30:21 AM
Hark at you, knowing all the facts and that! Sure am glad there's total fuckin strangers like you weighing in on the social life I've shared and cherished with these wonderful folks for 10-15 years.

Well there was that other occasion when they left you in a "coma" you just about woke up from.

But you're right, why on earth would I be entitled to comment on the social life you want to share with me?

bgmnts

So you had a really long sleep? Sounds ace.

Do you have any spare Xanax going?

Butchers Blind

12 hours sounds great.  I get about six hours interrupted sleep most days.

Cuellar

Yeah, sounds great. Get me some of that Xanax.

Blinder Data

Glad you're still alive.

Important question: did you piss yourself? Even if you deny it, I'm not sure I believe you. 22 hours without pissing is surely impossible.

chveik

seriously though, you need to examine that self-destructive behaviour of yours.

SteveDave

Quote from: madhair60 on December 02, 2019, 10:31:56 AM
Sleeping for 20+ hours sounds fucking great tbh.

Sounds like he's just fucking boasting.

alan nagsworth

Quote from: pupshaw on December 02, 2019, 10:54:02 AM
Well there was that other occasion when they left you in a "coma" you just about woke up from.

But you're right, why on earth would I be entitled to comment on the social life you want to share with me?

No idea what you're on about tbh but its weird you can't see owt wrong with overanalysing vague third party info and jumping to conclusions about people you've never met

Anyway Xanax is great and everyone should take it with lots of booze

BlodwynPig

Quote from: alan nagsworth on December 02, 2019, 02:28:07 PM
No idea what you're on about tbh but its weird you can't see owt wrong with overanalysing vague third party info and jumping to conclusions about people you've never met

Anyway Xanax is great and everyone should take it with lots of booze

Reaping what you sow if you continue with this. Have you considered Wexford and ribena instead

alan nagsworth

Ribena's too sweet. Call me crazy but I just wouldn't ever consider poisoning my body with that garbage

dallasman

Reported for hedonism. Should be an autoban.

kngen

Probably quite scary to be out of the game that long, but given some of the coke/acid comedowns I've endured (including a particularly brutal coke comedown that lasted 3 or 4 days where I started to convince myself that I'd triggered a hitherto undetected form of paranoid schizophrenia that had lain dormant up until that point), I'd have murdered my own family for half a Xanax. All I had was Benylin, and that just made me feel woozy, and only allowed for an occasional 30 minutes doze at most, then I'd wake up, with my heart-racing hypnagogic jerk-style and convince myself that the police were banging on my door. Man, I'm so glad I stopped taking drugs. Even the worst booze hangover is a walk in the park (with the occasional pitstop to boak your ring behind a bush) in comparison.

alan nagsworth

Yes, it is fucking horrible, in all honesty. I haven't taken coke in a little while and just recently I had been quite pleased at my ability to resist it. Wretched drug. 22 hours conked out did not shake the anxiety that just lies in wait for me. It came up with a vengeance, the heart racing, the intense self-loathing. I am massively displeased with myself for once again pissing another weekend up the wall — although having designed the event flyer thankfully my flights and entry to the gig were not at my expense. But I seriously need to quit the stupid wreckhead antics. I'm considering quitting intoxicants entirely although I am acutely aware that it may be the hardest thing I've ever had to do.