Author Topic: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake  (Read 2693 times)

Glebe

  • Even if it's ovah d'fown!
Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #60 on: December 03, 2019, 05:24:38 AM »
Oh, here's a fun one. I have to limit myself to one cup of real tea a day, then shift to decaf tea or I get panic attacks that I'm pretty sure are a consequence of all the acid I did when I was in my late teens (the sensation of 'the fear' and just about hanging onto my sanity by my fingernails is uncannily similar to when the acid stopped being fun towards the end of that period of my life). It's not a particularly strong hook for a 'Don't do drugs' campaign – 'Thirty years from now, you'll kick yourself when you forget to bring a decaf teabag with you when you go out for breakfast!' – but it might work with someone, I suppose.

Actually I've been limiting myself to one cup of tea (or occasionally coffee) a day for the last few years, preferably in morn/afternoon, also because too much caffeine makes me jumpy. Been fairly successful with it too (I do indulge in coke and other soft drinks tbh, but have been trying to limit that). Also started drinking decaf tea in evenings/at night again recently too.

NEW PAGE TWAT!

alan nagsworth

  • astronaut cock and snoopy the fuck dog
Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #61 on: December 03, 2019, 07:38:58 AM »
I have actually been occasionally using Nytol to aid me when I’ve had a couple nights of poor sleep and just really need help turning my brain off. It seems to work alright but as with most things I am acutely aware of not letting it become a habit.

Thanks everyone for your concern. I somehow feel even more tired and depressed today and I’m one step closer to point blank giving up all intoxicants as I just can’t face how fucking miserable they make me feel any more. I definitely don’t have an addiction problem but I do have some sort of dependency that’s triggered by having dreadful self control and that’s not a healthy component of the human body, so I think I need to get rid of it entirely.

Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #62 on: December 03, 2019, 11:17:54 AM »
What's the difference between dependence and addiction?

alan nagsworth

  • astronaut cock and snoopy the fuck dog
Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #63 on: December 03, 2019, 11:54:53 AM »
I would say addiction is more like not being able to get through day to day life without a thing. Whereas dependence is more like, if I’m gonna be in this specific situation I really need this thing to get through it.

I only drink a couple times a week and I can count on two hands the amount of times I’ve done blow, but I rely on booze heavily to loosen up and enjoy myself and curtail my social anxiety when around certain people. I wouldn’t say I’m addicted (I have gone without booze for a month on a couple of occasions and I didn’t find it massively difficult, whereas an addict would struggle with that) but I do convince myself I need it at certain times.

I’m not trying to play down the fact that I clearly have an “alcohol problem”, because I definitely do: I can largely cope fine without it but on the weekends once I start I find it hard to stop.

Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #64 on: December 03, 2019, 12:54:17 PM »
Have you heard of wanking? A wank before bed will give you a great night's sleep, not to mention a cracking orgasm.

alan nagsworth

  • astronaut cock and snoopy the fuck dog
Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #65 on: December 04, 2019, 11:20:36 AM »
I feel like this thing has done some real lasting damage to me. I haven’t felt good for more than a couple hours since I got back home and my head is totally fucked. I can’t focus on basic tasks at work, my mind keeps spinning out, I feel faint and exhausted and my anxiety is through the roof. I feel like I’m constantly on the brink of bursting into tears, I’m a fucking mess.

How long is this going to stay in my system? I am massively depressed. I keep thinking about what would have happened if I had died, I’m filled with dread and regret and I seriously hate myself. This is horrible.

Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #66 on: December 04, 2019, 11:21:28 AM »
That sounds like a normal day to me. I may leave the xanax then.

imitationleather

  • "The French... are famous... for their kissing"
    • http://last.fm/user/ImiLeathr
Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #67 on: December 04, 2019, 11:30:40 AM »
Xanax is an extremely short-acting benzo (which is why it's so addictive and giving it up is dangerous), so it barely stays in your system for any time at all. What you took was either not really Xanax, or you're having a very terrible hangover and comedown rather than anything benzo-related. Taking 1mg of Xanax, which is what half of one should be, is not going to have you feeling like that days later.

Better Midlands

  • I'm not internationally known
Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #68 on: December 04, 2019, 11:32:54 AM »
I feel like this thing has done some real lasting damage to me. I haven’t felt good for more than a couple hours since I got back home and my head is totally fucked. I can’t focus on basic tasks at work, my mind keeps spinning out, I feel faint and exhausted and my anxiety is through the roof. I feel like I’m constantly on the brink of bursting into tears, I’m a fucking mess.

How long is this going to stay in my system? I am massively depressed. I keep thinking about what would have happened if I had died, I’m filled with dread and regret and I seriously hate myself. This is horrible.

You'll be feeling better by the weekend, don't beat yourself up about it, you were probably just exhausted from the build up to the event and staying awake. Try to avoid alcohol and get as much sleep as possible.

alan nagsworth

  • astronaut cock and snoopy the fuck dog
Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #69 on: December 04, 2019, 11:39:40 AM »
What’s confusing me is I have been really up and down. Like, I went to a flat viewing yesterday, and I cooked a nice healthy meal confidently and happily, me and my girlfriend watched Curb and I laughed and I felt alright. But before that I had to leave work early and go home and curl up under the covers for an hour to try and straighten out because I was properly not connected to reality. So all I can surmise is that I’m going through some long drawn out anxiety attack as a result of fucking myself up with a whack of substances I very rarely take and my body is really struggling to get through that. But I don’t know if that’s something I just need to wait out because it feels wretched and I want it to stop.

Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #70 on: December 04, 2019, 11:42:07 AM »
I feel like this thing has done some real lasting damage to me. I haven’t felt good for more than a couple hours since I got back home and my head is totally fucked. I can’t focus on basic tasks at work, my mind keeps spinning out, I feel faint and exhausted and my anxiety is through the roof. I feel like I’m constantly on the brink of bursting into tears, I’m a fucking mess.

How long is this going to stay in my system? I am massively depressed. I keep thinking about what would have happened if I had died, I’m filled with dread and regret and I seriously hate myself. This is horrible.

Sounds more booze related to me. Coke and xanax don’t stay in system for long.

That’s what my hangovers are like anyway. The fatigue will make it worse as well.

Dr Rock

  • The BEST of luck!
Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #71 on: December 04, 2019, 11:42:29 AM »
How much Nytol are you taking? My recollection is that stuff stays in your system for ages.

Sorry you're feeling shit.

Cardenio I

  • Hasta la muerte, todo es vida
Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #72 on: December 04, 2019, 11:43:46 AM »
Quote
So all I can surmise is that I’m going through some long drawn out anxiety attack as a result of fucking myself up with a whack of substances I very rarely take and my body is really struggling to get through that. But I don’t know if that’s something I just need to wait out because it feels wretched and I want it to stop.

This sounds bang on the money to me - I've been in a similar situation myself and it's horrible, but likely just needs to be waited out. If it gets to be too much or lingers for too long go and see a doctor, but it sounds to me like you had too much fucked up your brain for a bit with a rotten, long-tailed comedown. I had a few similar experiences before mercifully packing all that shit in. Not to force a moral into this story but sack off the uppers at least, or reassess all your drug use if you're feeling spicy.

alan nagsworth

  • astronaut cock and snoopy the fuck dog
Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #73 on: December 04, 2019, 11:52:45 AM »
Thanks all. Sorry for the freakout, just didn’t quite know what to do with myself for a few spare minutes there and it helps to be heard and talked to, which is another indicator that it’s an anxiety thing.

I think unless I’m out with my girlfriend and I can measure my alcohol intake I just don’t want to drink any more.

Better Midlands

  • I'm not internationally known
Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #74 on: December 04, 2019, 12:09:39 PM »
I just don’t want to drink any more.

Give it a go, you'll feel a lot more stable in the long run and also when you do have an occasional sesh you'll recognise the hangover/comedown for what it is and be able to decide whether it's worth the bother.

Cardenio I

  • Hasta la muerte, todo es vida
Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #75 on: December 04, 2019, 12:21:45 PM »
Can confirm giving up booze is good shit.

Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #76 on: December 04, 2019, 12:57:22 PM »
Mate, please make taking drugs a thing of the past. If you get to your age without it causing any serious problems then you're fucking lucky.

Hope you're feeling better soon.

Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #77 on: December 04, 2019, 01:05:07 PM »
My advice is every time you feel like having a drug, just have a lovely crunch of a juicy apple instead. You will be right as rain.

Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #78 on: December 04, 2019, 01:16:22 PM »
Hark at you

It just wouldn't be CaB without a kneejerk blanket judgement of someone's social circle without any of the relevant facts. You could set your watch by it.

Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #79 on: December 04, 2019, 01:22:25 PM »
its weird you can’t see owt wrong with overanalysing vague third party info and jumping to conclusions about people you’ve never met

Have you heard of this website called cookdandbombd?

Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #80 on: December 04, 2019, 01:29:46 PM »
I've never had a friend circle as a teen or an adult

There's a shock.

Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #81 on: December 04, 2019, 01:32:20 PM »
I love the Xanax Marketing Board's slogan.

"XANAX: IT'S REALLY, REALLY ADDICTIVE!"

"XANAX: ON BALANCE, YOU PROBABLY WON'T DIE"

Cuntbeaks

  • Where you fay?
Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #82 on: December 04, 2019, 01:33:05 PM »
TLDR

Lightweight gets mullered, can't cope with the comedown

Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #83 on: December 04, 2019, 01:35:26 PM »
Thanks man, but really it just makes me more angry than sad (although one of them, back in the day, taught me one of my favourite bits of music on the guitar, so - if I'm ever noodling away and find myself playing that, I do stop for a minute and think, 'Fuck's sake, man. How did it get that bad?', as his was a particularly shitey, squalid death. That said, they'd pretty much become strangers to me by the time they died, from what they'd turned their life into as much as just a general disconnection between us.

It's basically Tommy from Trainspotting. Why is heroin so big in Scotland?

Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #84 on: December 04, 2019, 01:45:15 PM »
drugged sleep is not proper sleep

Is that because you don't dream during drugged up sleep? And dreams are where you get your refreshment from sleep?

It's an interesting theory certainly.

Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #85 on: December 04, 2019, 01:47:03 PM »
I would say addiction is more like not being able to get through day to day life without a thing. Whereas dependence is more like, if I’m gonna be in this specific situation I really need this thing to get through it.

I'd say that's incorrect and dependence and addiction are the same thing, in my ignorant opinion.

Dr Rock

  • The BEST of luck!
Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #86 on: December 04, 2019, 02:10:26 PM »
Dependence is when you need something or you'll be worse off somehow, or you imagine you'll be worse off.

Addiction is when the thing you have become dependent on starts having negative effects on your life but you can't stop.

If a doctor tries either of those words on me I tell 'em I'm 'reliant' on my medication. I accept I 'depend' on it, but the word is too negative, so we'll use 'reliant' if that's ok.

Then they write something in my notes about drug-seeking behaviour.

alan nagsworth

  • astronaut cock and snoopy the fuck dog
Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #87 on: December 04, 2019, 02:26:07 PM »
I’m not reliant on drugs, doc. I just lean on them for stability, like a walking stick, except if there was a type of walking stick that ordinarily healthy people use when they’re crippled. Shame there isn’t a word for that. Anyway can I have 600 cocodamol please

imitationleather

  • "The French... are famous... for their kissing"
    • http://last.fm/user/ImiLeathr
Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #88 on: December 04, 2019, 02:27:15 PM »
I’m not reliant on drugs, doc. I just lean on them for stability, like a walking stick, except if there was a type of walking stick that ordinarily healthy people use when they’re crippled. Shame there isn’t a word for that. Anyway can I have 600 cocodamol please

Dr Rock is not a real doctor.

Bennett Brauer

  • I'm not "likeable"
Re: Big fat Xanax coma for fucks sake
« Reply #89 on: December 04, 2019, 02:40:41 PM »
If a doctor tries either of those words on me I tell 'em I'm 'reliant' on my medication. I accept I 'depend' on it, but the word is too negative, so we'll use 'reliant' if that's ok.

Then they write something in my notes about drug-seeking behaviour.

GP: It says here that you've previously admitted to stealing items from Tesco.

DR ROCK: I'm robbin'-reliant.

[they high-five across the table]