The Last CaB post that made you GUFFAW out loud II: The GUFFAWther Part 2

[Cerys]

Seriously though, imagine Rassilon standing there without a knob.

Caught me offguard.  Almost asphyxiated.

[idunnosomename]

big laugh here. at least eight has.

Sadly, David Baddiel's work says nothing to me about my life because I've never blacked up and stuck a pineapple on my head.

[Cuellar]

[jenna appleseed]

The grift will never be over, because we're keeping the brand alive.

eta: it's gets better...

Arbeit Macht Frei(heit), presumably.

[EditGlitch Removal Person]

Happy to help!

[Shit Good Nose]

On a similar note.

[non capisco]

^ Incredible!

[greencalx]

The concept of a "sandwich artist" has had me rolling in the aisles.

[Famous Mortimer]

Fucking hell, whoa. This stuff is really intense. I'm doing some serious shitting.

Bravo The Mollusk.

[Ferris]

His TikToks are now just him filming what he's watching on telly.

Stick around for the punchline to this one https://www.tiktok.com/@user7132816715377/video/6917692965041212674

"So Graham, what have you been up to lately?"
"Actually I've just been filming something with Eddie Redmayne"

[Rich Uncle Skeleton]

I knew someone once who had a colonoscopy but when they put it up there and looked at the screen, it was just Russian dashcam footage of car crashes.

When I had mine done it turned out my dad had taped over my colon with the snooker.

[Butchers Blind]

Everything in this thread

https://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/forums/index.php/topic,84592.0.html

[imitationleather]

Oh, why's that then?

[Glebe]

Aw thanks Cuellar! Folks have been knocking out some absolutely cracking 'shops of late!

[JaDanketies]

Not saying family history can't ever be interesting (though it doesn't particularly interest me) but being "proud of one's genetic lineage" is a tell-tale sign of provincial fascism. I hope to publish a small monograph on the subject one day. How To Identify A Bigoted Dimwit by Mobbd.

Do it, if nothing else it'll be something for your eventual kids to have pride in.

[Bernice]

It's dumb as shit, but this on Tony Bennett getting the covid vaccine:

I've heard an excerpt from his new album and it's him going "Shaba doo dah, shaba doo dez, everybody do what Bill Gates says" #justsayin #makesyouthink

[non capisco]

Thanks Bernice, that nomination is extremely charitable.

[Bernice]

Sometimes no effort is just the right amount of effort.

[jenna appleseed]

Racecarbonara

(that's all i got)

[Better Midlands]

Now come on people, you can't just talk about CaB bad guys - you need to mention the goodies.

[St_Eddie]

S09E02 - Back to Earth Part 2

The gang go for a wander and the public dig them, believing them to be the actors from Red Dwarf in costume. They discover Red Dwarf DVDs. "It's a TV series about us!" Rimmer reasons, and Kryten notes that the DVDs "recount all our adventures, every single one of them!". Everyone has a wobble over the realisation that they're not real and are merely TV characters come to life. The funniest thing about all this is the huge Red Dwarf display at the video store. I have never seen such a thing in real life. I think I saw a Series 8 DVD at CEX once in the corner, covered in shit.

[sirhenry]

I do hope every single one of those cunts in that story gets a pipe shoved down their throat and has mulched up greggs pasties poured down their gullet until their liver swells to the point of such excruciating pain that the feeling of the bolt gun pressed up against their head feels like a hug from mummy.

[Beagle 2]

I went and saw Tom Jones last night, he read out the words to 'Sex Bomb'. Not going to work, mate.

I can hear this very clearly in my head and visualise elderly women scowling and irritably putting their knickers back in their handbags.

[The Mollusk]

Seth Brundle shows off his Cheggars splicing results

The fact that only one of them really looks like Cheggers makes it even funnier.

[paruses]

Tell them that by "Others" you thought they meant the Railway Killer John Duffy.

Job application form advice to bgmnts.

[Bad Ambassador]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Catlow#Plot

[Shit Good Nose]

Only just seen Mr Fahrenheit's latest masterpiece in the Matt thread - https://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/forums/index.php/topic,83931.240.html

[idunnosomename]

Incredible.

[Chollis]

fuckin unreal

[buzby]

Pilj's bunkbed tale in the Guardian problem page thread