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The Last CaB post that made you GUFFAW out loud II: The GUFFAWther Part 2

Started by madhair60, December 06, 2019, 09:38:50 AM

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idunnosomename

i mean after that i did look it up of course but still. will give it the proverbial spin

Paul Calf

Quote from: Alberon on June 02, 2020, 08:16:46 PM
I'm trying to think of one post I've made that doesn't violate one of those rules. This one is okay so far.




Trump bums goats.



Damn.

Cuellar


touchingcloth

Quote from: Hand Solo on June 04, 2020, 12:32:53 AM
Putting my detective hat on, the psychology of the suspect would be quite similar to extrovert abusers like Savile. Obsessed with rank, super inflated ego and social climber complex so he can use his assumed authority to manipulate others. He'd keep an exercise regime in order to stay limber and lithe in case he ever had to do a runner from the police. Would also appear to do a grandiose level of philanthropy to ingratiate himself with the public and throw them off the scent.


When I read this post the picture was hidden off screen below the text, so I reacted hugely when I scrolled down[nb]In case the image link breaks in future, it's
Spoiler alert
captain "Holocaust" Tom
[close]
. [/nb]. I can't think of a similar pullback and reveal moment on CaB, so props to you.


ProvanFan



alan nagsworth

Quote from: Joe Oakes on June 05, 2020, 05:47:04 PM
I'm just surprised that Shakespeare hasn't been cancelled yet.

I googled 'Was Shakespeare a racist?', and to my relief, he was. I always knew there was a better reason than stupidity for me not liking Shakespeare, it's just because I'm not a bigot, unlike Ian McKellen.

Something about that sentence stripped of its context has really set me off.




touchingcloth

Quote from: alan nagsworth on June 05, 2020, 06:13:22 PM
Something about that sentence stripped of its context has really set me off.

Same, that's ace. Definitely Partridge-esque.



Ferris

Quote from: alan nagsworth on June 07, 2020, 04:16:21 PM
I agree they should have made the Harry Potter books more working class. Like "Scum". Imagine Harry Potter smashing Draco Malfoy's teeth off the edge of a sink in the school bathroom. Imagine Neville Longbottom getting sodomised in the Hogwarts greenhouses by Crabbe and Goyle while Professor Sprout turns a blind eye, the screeching of the Mandrakes covering his own feeble whimpers, and then slashing his wrists with some sort of magic knife back in the Gryffindor common room when he finds out he's back on gardening duties next week. Imagine it.

Quote from: ProvanFan on June 07, 2020, 05:21:21 PM




pancreas

Quote from: Elderly Sumo Prophecy on June 09, 2020, 02:27:37 AM
Why the fuck don't you have a statue of Cheggers? Write to your MP and demand it. Either that or rename the airport to Keith Chegwin airport. Or Chegwick.

I am easily pleased.




Quote from: seepage on June 10, 2020, 03:50:47 AM
True life deso: once went to see IT bloke at work but he wasn't there. Afterwards woman in next desk emailed him: "there was a suspicious man with an extremely funny looking face at your desk asking about a PC". Of course, he forwarded it to me and added: "seepage, were you that suspicious man with an extremely funny looking face?"

Retinend

Quote from: shiftwork2 on June 17, 2019, 06:09:45 PM
Quote from: The Boston Crab on June 14, 2019, 09:23:06 PM


It's unsettling because of a reversal of the meat role.  The meat has become the mincer.  Spaghetti is moonlighting as the mince.  It's really quite visceral food horror.


Dex Sawash


Butchers Blind


PlanktonSideburns



Ferris

Quote from: kittens on June 15, 2020, 12:23:13 PM
i receive weekly emails from my job that i read in a state of sheer terror at the prospect of being recalled back to the sludge factory. they do a question and answer section and many of the questions are from other people doing my job in branches around the country. they invariably ask "when can we come back how can you expect us to just sit around at home doing nothing" and i marvel at the lives these people must lead. please Sir manacle me to my desk. i beg of you allow me to waste my limited years doing the most boring shit imaginable. i have tasted freedom and it is foul. i cannot live without the pain you inflict upon me for £8.55 an hour. people so inured to day-to-day drudge that they cannot work out how to exist without their boss telling them what to do. absolutely terrifying.

Spoiler alert
"I have tasted freedom and it is foul"
[close]