Author Topic: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot  (Read 6202 times)

Jim Bob

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Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« on: January 03, 2020, 07:50:12 AM »
Jay and Silent Bob Reboot

For those who aren’t aware, this is Kevin Smith’s latest movie; an instalment in Smith’s “Askewniverse” and a direct sequel to Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back.  It’s a movie about fatherhood and a satire of the whole reboot culture which exists within modern Hollywood.

I went into this with immensely low expectations and in some ways, those expectations were met.  However, what surprised me was that there were several scenes of genuine warmth.  It’s a movie of two halves; one moment they’ll be a scene where the characters feel like real people, but said scenes will be immediately followed by some of the worst cringe inducing cartoonish “comedy” this side of Epic Movie.

Seriously, some of the comedic material within this movie is beyond the pale.  I don’t know how Kevin Smith can put his name to this in good conscience.  The movie opens with a chicken restaurant facade named “Cock Smokers” and Kevin Smith (verging on 50, it should be noted) deemed it not only wise to use that awful pun but also to have characters laugh at said pun and proclaim “Cock Smokers! That’s funny!”.  It’s not funny.

Speaking of not funny, there’s also this whole subplot involving “Hater Tots” and a scene with the KKK, who love said “Hater Tots”.  Do you get it?  It’s like tater tots but instead of tater, it’s hater and the KKK hate black people, so they like Hater Tots.  That’s literally the extent of the joke and Kevin Smith runs that joke into the ground as though it were a veritable comedic goldmine.  The worst thing that ever happened to Kevin Smith was weed (Seth Rogen inducted Kevin into regular cannabis smoking during the shoot for Zack and Miri Make a Porno).  The green haze appears to have killed his judgement of what’s good and what should never be put onscreen.

The last act of the movie is the worst part; it simply devolves into an utterly shameless self-indulgent exercise in metaphorical autofellatio.  Kevin Smith plays himself.  You might think this would be an opportunity for self-deprivation, but bizarrely and somewhat sickeningly, Smith instead chooses to paint himself in a positive light, with only minor jabs made at his own expense (for example, his penchant for wearing jhorts).  He also contrives a scenario where he gets to cosplay as Iron Man, via his alter ego Silent Bob.  Moments such as that come across as a 5 year old being given the budget to make a movie and using that money as a means of pure wish fulfilment.

I’m tempted to say that this is the worst movie which Kevin Smith has ever made, but I can’t because I’ve seen Yoga Hosers.  I think that the most frustrating thing about Jay and Silent Bob Reboot is that somewhere within, you can see a decent movie trying to get out.  There are fleeting moments where the movie takes itself and the characters seriously.  Moments where it stops being a cartoon and feels grounded.  In these moments, Smith is able to recapture some of the old magic which made the likes of Clerks and Dogma such endearing yarns.

However any goodwill is quickly undone by a scene of an angry Uber driver hurling Hater Tots at the protagonists, or a cameo by Chris Hemsworth which essentially amounts to “look! I was able to rope a Hollywood star into appearing in my crappy movie!”.  You’ll have those painful scenes but then you’ll have a moment such as the particularly affecting scene involving Holden from Chasing Amy and it almost feels as though the movie is threatening to be half decent.  Sadly though, the weed prevails and squanders any potential with awful puns and jokes unworthy of even a Christmas cracker.

Perhaps it’s time for Silent Bob to put down the bong.
« Last Edit: January 03, 2020, 08:59:16 AM by Jim Bob »

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #1 on: January 03, 2020, 04:25:43 PM »
A pal of mine, Dom Burns, was one of the two dozen or so producers on this, and also doubled for Smith as Silent Bob in shots where you only needed to see his elbow or something (he's a not unreasonable lookalike). He had a much more substantial position on the film's companion piece 'Madness In The Method', which I think is far superior - about ten per cent of 'Madness' was shot in Derby, passing itself off as L.A. rather better than you might expect.

Jim Bob

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #2 on: January 03, 2020, 07:07:20 PM »
A pal of mine, Dom Burns, was one of the two dozen or so producers on this, and also doubled for Smith as Silent Bob in shots where you only needed to see his elbow or something (he's a not unreasonable lookalike). He had a much more substantial position on the film's companion piece 'Madness In The Method', which I think is far superior - about ten per cent of 'Madness' was shot in Derby, passing itself off as L.A. rather better than you might expect.

Huh.  I'll have to check out Madness in the Method.  I had been put off by it because it was directed by Jason Mewes, who's only other film that I've seen is Jay & Silent Bob's Super Groovy Cartoon Movie!, which was truly awful.

Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #3 on: January 06, 2020, 11:04:27 AM »
Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
The worst thing that ever happened to Kevin Smith was weed (Seth Rogen inducted Kevin into regular cannabis smoking during the shoot for Zack and Miri Make a Porno).  The green haze appears to have killed his judgement of what’s good and what should never be put onscreen.

Listening to his podcasts is also woeful, I used to enjoy Edumacation (being the least shitty Marvel-content one) but when he just was high all the time it was just really self-indulgent shite. I can't imagine the other podcasts talking about stuff where he could dribble over it for the duration of the thing

Shaky

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #4 on: January 06, 2020, 01:53:11 PM »
I got through about 25 minutes of this and, as someone who genuinely welcomes Clerks 3 and even tolerates the idea of a Mallrats sequel, it's absolutely fucking awful so far. The opening sequence is literally people shouting, "Fuck!" at each other multiple times. Christ.

madhair60

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #5 on: January 06, 2020, 02:18:42 PM »
Is this "available", then?

Jim Bob

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #6 on: January 06, 2020, 05:37:54 PM »
Is this "available", then?

It is.  It's a low quality CAM but it's a Kevin Smith movie, so it's not as though you'll be missing out on some glorious sweeping shots and majestic cinematography that you might have otherwise seen in HD.

Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #7 on: January 06, 2020, 07:24:48 PM »
To my surprise, an advert for this popped up when I was streaming free pornography recently. Smith knows his audience.

kidsick5000

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #8 on: January 06, 2020, 07:44:57 PM »
I'd love to see that Jonathan Ross review of Clerks 2. Pure vitriol. One or both parties involved have done an incredibly good job in having it disappeared from the internet.

magval

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #9 on: January 06, 2020, 08:50:00 PM »
I remember that,but only because he insisted on pronouncing it as "Clarks".

Jim Bob

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #10 on: January 07, 2020, 12:57:15 AM »
I remember that,but only because he insisted on pronouncing it as "Clarks".

Grave.

Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #11 on: January 07, 2020, 07:02:16 PM »
To my surprise, an advert for this popped up when I was streaming free pornography recently. Smith knows his audience.

Fleshlight used to be a sponsor on SModcast. Very on-brand for him.

madhair60

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #12 on: January 07, 2020, 09:59:31 PM »
It is.  It's a low quality CAM but it's a Kevin Smith movie, so it's not as though you'll be missing out on some glorious sweeping shots and majestic cinematography that you might have otherwise seen in HD.

For someone who apparently LOVES CINEMA you certainly like to STEAL FROM FILMMAKERS.

Jim Bob

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #13 on: January 08, 2020, 12:01:32 AM »
For someone who apparently LOVES CINEMA you certainly like to STEAL FROM FILMMAKERS.

I don't love going to the cinema.  I hate going to the cinema.  People ruin the experience by getting their phones out, talking, kicking the back of my seat and loudly eating food.  Furthermore, this movie isn't on general release, so unless one paid through the nose to attend one of Kevin Smith's Q&A tours, its the only way to watch it for now.

Sebastian Cobb

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #14 on: January 08, 2020, 12:08:49 AM »
Cam's keep all of that experience in though, and look shit.

madhair60

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #15 on: January 08, 2020, 09:28:29 AM »
I don't love going to the cinema.  I hate going to the cinema.  People ruin the experience by getting their phones out, talking, kicking the back of my seat and loudly eating food.

I agree with this wholeheartedly, but my 90% wilfully stupid post was about love of cinema, not love of going to the cinema.

Quote
Furthermore, this movie isn't on general release, so unless one paid through the nose to attend one of Kevin Smith's Q&A tours, its the only way to watch it for now.

Oh, that's alright then

Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #16 on: January 09, 2020, 06:03:35 PM »
Quote
the movie opens with a chicken restaurant facade named “Cock Smokers” and Kevin Smith (verging on 50, it should be noted) deemed it not only wise to use that awful pun but also to have characters laugh at said pun and proclaim “Cock Smokers! That’s funny!”.  It’s not funny.

I don't want to go to bat for what is easily going to be like watching people die, but this sounds like a 'that's the joke' type moment. It's still not funny, but it sounds like they've just took the piss out of such a crap idea.

madhair60

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #17 on: January 10, 2020, 03:37:46 PM »
I don't want to go to bat for what is easily going to be like watching people die, but this sounds like a 'that's the joke' type moment. It's still not funny, but it sounds like they've just took the piss out of such a crap idea.

Yes, it seems like a callback to this from the original

Assistant Director(GWH 2): Okay, you two. Just stand there, and react. Don't say anything!
[Points to Silent Bob]
Assistant Director(GWH 2): Especially you.
Jay: [to Silent Bob] That's pretty funny.

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #18 on: January 10, 2020, 08:40:02 PM »
This thread is way more interesting than the movie. I made it 3/4 the way through and I have no opinion or comment, which is an unusual sensation for an opinionated cunt like me.

Jim Bob

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #19 on: January 11, 2020, 12:39:38 AM »
This thread is way more interesting than the movie. I made it 3/4 the way through and I have no opinion or comment, which is an unusual sensation for an opinionated cunt like me.

I don’t blame you.  It’s just a thing which exists.  It’s neither worth getting excited about, nor angry about.  It’s just a thing which exists.  Like a flavourless blancmange.  Just sat there, to the interest of nobody.  Sat there, being all pointless and bland.  Not even worth getting annoyed at.  Just a thing which exists.

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #20 on: January 11, 2020, 01:37:20 AM »
Think I made it to the end.  Took me 3 attempts to get that far.
I’ll probably give it another chance some time though.

I’ll always love Clerks/Chasing Amy/Mallrats cos I watched them when I was 15-18. They’re a bit good too especially the first 2.
The rest are all piss, but I’ll still watch them. Though I drew the line at Yoga Hosers and Tusk.

As he says in podcasts he doesn’t care what anyone thinks anymore about his films, he just makes what he wants.
That’s fine, I just wish they were good too.

Jason Mewes looks weird in these films too. It’s a bit like watching the DeNiro effects in The Irishman. You’re wondering what’s not right. The best ‘say no to drugs’ advert.

One thing that annoys me is his constant talk about smoking so much weed and being stoned all the time.
I think it was the Scroobyius Pip podcast or Brett Goldstein where he has to mention any time he gets the chance how much he smokes/how stoned he is/was.
Reminds me of fellas at first year at university who make out as if they are the Maradona of smoking weed and have non stop in-depth discussion about the best weed.

He tours these films too and watches them with a couple hundred sycophantic fans who probably whoop and cheer at every in-joke and every shit joke. Every shit in joke. Every shit.

I wish he’d put the bong down and make good films. He probably has it in him somewhere.
I’ll still watch though.

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #21 on: January 11, 2020, 03:54:59 PM »
I thought this was fucking shit to be honest, I expected some of the jokes to be weak but I thought there'd be some good ones, yet I only laughed twice (once at the awkwardness of Matt Damon's cameo, and once at Ben Affleck's Martha joke) and the serious mawkish elements were boring as shit. The meta Kevin Smith stuff was painful, the whole "If you don't have a dad you're never going to be okay" theme was insulting to single mothers across the world (and lesbian couples too of course), and the casual homophobia made me actively hate it at times. Fuck this movie then, and fuck Kevin Smith, there's no way I'll ever watch anything by him ever again now.

Jim Bob

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #22 on: January 11, 2020, 05:56:25 PM »
Quote from: Magnolia Fan
I thought this was fucking shit to be honest, I expected some of the jokes to be weak but I thought there'd be some good ones, yet I only laughed twice (once at the awkwardness of Matt Damon's cameo, and once at Ben Affleck's Martha joke) and the serious mawkish elements were boring as shit. The meta Kevin Smith stuff was painful, the whole "If you don't have a dad you're never going to be okay" theme was insulting to single mothers across the world (and lesbian couples too of course), and the casual homophobia made me actively hate it at times. Fuck this movie then, and fuck Kevin Smith, there's no way I'll ever watch anything by him ever again now.

Jay and Silent Bob Reboot is the worst movie I ever saw. Jay and Silent Bob are stupid characters. A couple of stoners who spout dumb-ass catchphrases like a third-rate Cheech and Chong or Bill and Ted. Fuck Kevin Smith. Fuck him up his stupid ass, in a non-homophobic way.

Small Man Big Horse

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #23 on: January 11, 2020, 07:27:37 PM »


Didn't quite get what you're doing there JimBob. I mean I largely agree with it (though more than it's just one of the most boring comedies I've ever watched rather than the worst film ever) but your summary misses out the shittier aspects of the film which is why I disliked it so.

Jim Bob

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #24 on: January 11, 2020, 08:52:29 PM »
Didn't quite get what you're doing there JimBob.

I was paraphrasing this scene, for humorous effect.  It wasn't a commentary on what you posted (which I happened to agree with).

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #25 on: January 11, 2020, 10:08:14 PM »
I was paraphrasing this scene, for humorous effect.  It wasn't a commentary on what you posted (which I happened to agree with).

Ah, now I'm with you, I'd managed to forget that scene but remember it now.

madhair60

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #26 on: January 11, 2020, 10:11:48 PM »
YOU ARE THE ONES WHO ARE THE BALL LICKERS

Ham Bap

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #27 on: January 12, 2020, 12:19:39 AM »
I’m watching this again.

You see what yous made me do.


Ham Bap

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Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #28 on: January 12, 2020, 12:29:07 AM »
Why does Kevin Smith keep tapping his phone loudly like that?

To reiterate Jason Mewes looks about 60 in this.

Re: Jay and Silent Bob Reboot
« Reply #29 on: January 20, 2020, 11:25:53 PM »
I went in with low expectations from what I'd heard. It was a little better than I expected.

The script felt like the first draft. It needed a fair bit more polish. Jokes would regularly go on for a line too long at least. Where the fuck did the KKK stuff come from? And the Russia stuff at the end was several hundred tokes too far.

The girl gang had nothing to them. All just to serve the pointless push for an emotional core which didn't work. I kept expecting some reveal about the gang but no, they were just a group of girls without fathers. Would have been a nice twist if they were secretly an animal liberation group as a twist on Strike Back. Harley Quinn Smith was actually okay though, not as Sofia Coppola as I was expecting.

I would criticise Iron Bob but the quick cutaway to Silent Bob inside the suit made me laugh.

Much as some of the cameos were tiring there were some fun ones. I still evidently fancy Kate Micucci. Val Kilmer made me laugh in just how absurdly bad he looked as Bluntman. Tommy Chong as Alfred was worth it for the line "woah, are we in Black Panther".

I am disappointed in how much Kevin Smith has lost his touch. I remember Clerks II coming out and it just blew me away how he could manage to make such a good sequel (I was 15 at the time). Tusk really was fucking dreadful. At the same time, there is some glimpses of the old Kevin Smith in this which gives me hope for the Clerks III planned.

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