British High Street Death List 2020

[Jasha]

I think Boots have (or had) a similar standing with pharmaceutical goods.

The high street shops are only the public facing arm, beyond the massive distribution division they are still one of the largest white label manufacturing chemists in Europe, was even bigger before they sold off the over the counter portfolio. After the Alliance Unichem takeover there was a huge uptake in inter company sales with Alliance using Boots to push their lines and drop competitors

[gilbertharding]

Need something to cover the floor with when you're doing a home haircut innit? Been buying The Guardian here lately. Been disappointed to note the shrinkage of the supplements but the pages certainly have been keeping my floors free of hair.

We, similarly, need paper to wrap the peelings and leftovers in before putting them in the swill bucket. However, we still, somehow, have pages of Observer left from March.

[Gurke and Hare]

Some of the bigger supermarkets carry a decent range of mags, although there are stories about them hiding Private Eye and anything more challenging than "Take A Break And Read How My Husband Knocked Up My Mother!".

Those are obviously bullshit stories though aren't they? Nobody's going to say "Oh, they haven't got Private Eye so I'll buy Take a Shite instead", they'll just buy Private Eye somewhere else and the supermarkets know that perfectly well.

[Icehaven]

I haven't bought Private Eye for a while now but when I did I usually got it from a supermarket and it was never hidden. It can be quite hard to spot as it's smaller and less gaudy than most magazines, and where it was placed varied as some shops put it with the newspapers, some with current affairs magazines, some just random as they didn't know where to put it, so I can see how a conspiratorial mind could turn that into a deliberate attempt to make it hard to find, but it's a bit far fetched. How would it even work? A customer unable to find it asking staff if they had any and the staff member looking panicky, eyes darting, replying "Private what? I don't know what you're talking about, I'm sorry I'm very busy" and running off?

[Gurke and Hare]

it's a bit far fetched. How would it even work? A customer unable to find it asking staff if they had any and the staff member looking panicky, eyes darting, replying "Private what? I don't know what you're talking about, I'm sorry I'm very busy" and running off?

That's what they want you to think.

[Huxleys Babkins]

I'd love to know the reason why *some* cornershops/local newsagents stock  such a copious, wide and various selection of Bongo Periodicals and Special Interest Journals. Especially in this day and age.

It's a sign that they sell really well in that region, if not necessarily that specific store.

I used to work in a convenience store. The thing with magazines for small newsagents is that you generally don't get to choose what comes in. You have an agreement with a distributor that you'll sell magazines on their behalf and they'll work out what you get based on shelf size and what's already selling in the region. We'd have regular visits from the regional representative who'd size up our shelves, work out what should go where and bollock us for not spacing them out right or putting them in the wrong category.

With the grot mags, whilst you'd have your monthly Fiesta, Razzle, etc. you'd also have specials that might be there for a quarter or even longer. There were some mags on that top shelf that were there the day I started and still there the day I left two years later. They just keep sending them and never ask for them back, so the collection grows and grows.

[Cuellar]

Probably more anonymous if you buy a jazz mag from a cornershop than if you go on pornhub.com to be honest

[thr0b]

Softcore erotica sells.

Years ago when I worked in Blockbuster, we got loads of software in for rental and sale. Mostly starring a young lady called Misty Mundae.

One bloke rented Erotic Raider every week. £2.50 for 7 nights.

I pointed out that we sold it for £5.99, but he only ever wanted to rent it. And did so for months.

The, er, condition some of those discs came back in required gloved handling.

[kalowski]

Not my local newsagents. Got the classic wall of magazines topped off by a top shelf of great British smut. Pretty sure I saw a Fiesta there the other day.

Had a cheeky peek at the top shelf when I was in this morning. A Star Trek magazine, a Star Wars magazine, a mag called Cakes and Bakes, Club International and one called Filthy MILFs.
That's enough for anyone on a Saturday afternoon.

[kalowski]

Cakes and Bakes was not a porn mag, by the way.

[beanheadmcginty]

You can't spell Star Wars without ars. Phwoar.

[Blue Jam]

You can't spell Star Trek without tart.

[Better Midlands]

Cakes and Bakes was not a porn mag, by the way.

Challenge accepted.

[Tony Tony Tony]

Cakes and Bakes was not a porn mag, by the way.

Yea but it is an anagram of Naked Beak Sacs so think on.

[Pranet]

Debenhams is on the brink AGAIN. Does anyone care? Only the staff.

Me. I buy my trousers from Debenhams. I am middle aged.

Even more on the brink now.


https://news.sky.com/story/coronavirus-debenhams-owners-draw-up-plan-for-department-store-chains-liquidation-12049794

[Dr Trouser]

Marks and Spencers canning 7,000 employees. Covid related apparently but I can't believe it hasn't been in terminal decline.

Fun fact: back in my days as a sound engineer (c 1993) one band's rider stipulated that all food and drink must be purchased from M&S or they wouldn't play. Manic Street Preachers for you.

[Huxleys Babkins]

Marks and Spencers canning 7,000 employees. Covid related apparently but I can't believe it hasn't been in terminal decline.

Fun fact: back in my days as a sound engineer (c 1993) one band's rider stipulated that all food and drink must be purchased from M&S or they wouldn't play. Manic Street Preachers for you.

Wire picks up an M&S cheese and onion sandwich with "You Love Us" written on it. He just nods in approval.

[Better Midlands]

Wire picks up an M&S cheese and onion sandwich with "You Love Us" written on it. He just nods in approval.

Edwards feeling peckish grabs a multipack with "4 Real Melton Mowbray Mini Pork Pies" etc....

[Blue Jam]

Pizza Express now closing 73 restaurants:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-53830064

[finnquark]

Pizza Express now closing 73 restaurants:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-53830064

Mate was doing some work on a possible sale recently; fell through though due to CCP politicking. Sure the affected employees can get reallocated to the forthcoming Chinese/Indian branches.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Pizza Express now closing 73 restaurants:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-53830064

Woking survives. Does it have a blue plaque now?

[Blue Jam]

I was astonished to learn that Wrexham had a Pizza Express. My beautiful hometown has certainly changed since I escaped. Did it have a branch of Coutts as well?

[Huxleys Babkins]

Pizza Express pizzas are disgusting. They drizzle them with olive oil before they put them in the oven so they are absolutely sodden with grease. Anything with processed meats on it is swimming in it.

[buttgammon]

I was astonished to learn that Wrexham had a Pizza Express. My beautiful hometown has certainly changed since I escaped. Did it have a branch of Coutts as well?

The Pizza Express was in the ill-fated Eagles Meadow development, so it got basically zero footfall because the place is always deserted. Even the Starbucks is closed now apparently!

God, yet another Wrexham thread in the making! I wouldn't mind but I haven't been to the town centre for about a year.

[Shit Good Nose]

Marks and Spencers canning 7,000 employees. Covid related apparently but I can't believe it hasn't been in terminal decline.

Fun fact: back in my days as a sound engineer (c 1993) one band's rider stipulated that all food and drink must be purchased from M&S or they wouldn't play. Manic Street Preachers for you.

Big fan of M&S food here.  Their moussakas (both the "normal" M&S one and the Gastro Pub one) are particularly amazing.  They're definitely at the top when it comes to supermarket ready meals, even over Waitrose, and their basic single filling £1 sandwiches were a lunchtime staple for me when I worked in Bath.

I hope it doesn't get to a point where the whole lot goes.

[holyzombiejesus]

The vegan tuna and sweetcorn sandwiches are ok, in so far as they're not inedible or the same as every other place's vegetarian offerings. Their beer prices take the piss, mind.

Used to be a really good place to shoplift from, back when I'd do such things. Pick up an umbrella on the way in, walk out with it and then return it the next day for twenty quids worth of vouchers which would immediately be spent on food and booze for a lovely free night in.

[Huxleys Babkins]

I hope it doesn't get to a point where the whole lot goes.

Everything Must Go
(                          )

[wooders1978]

The pizza express in my town is in a lovely location with a great outside area for summer dining - was really hoping it would bite the dust so we could get something half decent in like a cote brasserie or even a good independent but it appears to have evaded the scythe this time round, mores the pity

[Captain Z]

Pizza Express pizzas are disgusting. They drizzle them with olive oil before they put them in the oven so they are absolutely sodden with grease.

Has this exact sentence been posted before? I thought I was re-reading old replies and that's given me serious deja-vu.

[Shit Good Nose]

Everything Must Go
(                          )

Thank you - I was hoping someone would pick up on that.  I wasn't sure how obvious it was.


(I am genuinely a BIG fan of M&S food, though)