Snooker 2020

[buttgammon]

I'm still obsessed with Snooker 19, so another game would be curtains on the PhD.

In fairness, wouldn't they have licensing issues for the Hendry game seeing as all the players/tournaments/venues/World Snooker bollocks are on Snooker 19? Johnny O'Mulligan v Ron Piggins would be funny, though.

[Blue Jam]

I think it was going to be a single player game where you could only play against Hendry, possibly with a career mode and a coaching mode but I remember it was going to include some classic hendry matches you could re-enact, all with Michaela Tabb as the ref.

Remember it was only going to be 50% of a complete game, marketed as This Is Snooker/This Is Pool in the UK, and This Is Pool/This Is Snooker in the US.

[sevendaughters]

I'm still obsessed with Snooker 19, so another game would be curtains on the PhD.

I sank into two separate Football Managers and still got it done, I believe.

[buttgammon]

I sank into two separate Football Managers and still got it done, I believe.

Fair play! I specifically had to delete Football Manager when I started.

[Flouncer]

Just a heads up if you're jonesing for some baize action. The group rounds of the Championship League are being broadcast for free on the Matchroom Live website; you just have to sign up to access it (it didn't even ask me to confirm my email so I could have put fuckoffbarry@youcunt.com). I'm just watching Jimmy White get demolished by AIDS Murphy.

[Famous Mortimer]

Just a heads up if you're jonesing for some baize action. The group rounds of the Championship League are being broadcast for free on the Matchroom Live website; you just have to sign up to access it (it didn't even ask me to confirm my email so I could have put fuckoffbarry@youcunt.com). I'm just watching Jimmy White get demolished by AIDS Murphy.

It's asking me to subscribe to a $1.99 a month package (may be to do with my location, mind).

[Puce Moment]

Just a heads up if you're jonesing for some baize action. The group rounds of the Championship League are being broadcast for free on the Matchroom Live website; you just have to sign up to access it (it didn't even ask me to confirm my email so I could have put fuckoffbarry@youcunt.com). I'm just watching Jimmy White get demolished by AIDS Murphy.

Wonderful thanks!

Oh, Dominic Dale in the commentary box....

[Blue Jam]

The European Masters has just kicked off in exotic continental Milton Keynes. Combing Strategies is playing some luxuriantly-coiffed child and I think the boy's dense blond locks may just put him off his stride.

Higgins vs Gould on the other table but I'm having me tea and don't want to lose my appetite.

[Blue Jam]

Legend Gary Wilson and Daniel Wells have tested positive for the 'vid. They've had to pull out of the European Masters and self-isolate, along with the players who had been ledging it with them over the weekend:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/snooker/54249384

Get well soon, you coughin' cuemen.

[Blue Jam]

Ronjo got a walkover to round 2 thanks to the 'vid. Now at 3-3 to Irish child Arron Hill. This kicked off at 7, I had assumed it would be over by now. Hoping for a good Cahilling here.

Get on Eurosport or Bazzavision please CaBbers, what else are you gonna do?

[Blue Jam]

YESSSSSSSS!

"Arron Hill. Remember the name."

Yes, Neil Foulds, I think I will. Classy AF.

[Blue Jam]

In other second round news, Mark Williams was defeated by recent Q-school graduate and YouTube rapper Peter Devlin:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/snooker/54284525:

https://youtu.be/Uom73cax5TM
https://youtu.be/InFY45H5bfw

Hmmmm. I guess they're both more woke than The Romford Rap.

[petril]

In other second round news, Mark Williams was defeated by recent Q-school graduate and YouTube rapper Peter Devlin:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/snooker/54284525:

https://youtu.be/Uom73cax5TM
https://youtu.be/InFY45H5bfw

Hmmmm. I guess they're both more woke than The Romford Rap.

at least it wasn't an Ebdon effort

[Blue Jam]

at least it wasn't an Ebdon effort

Bit Yacht Rock that. It's still better than Alex Higgins' efforts:

https://youtu.be/fSyXK0iVXN0

[Blue Jam]

Neil Foulds and Andy Goldstein now broadcasting live from their respective man caves. Jimmy White is Zooming in from his nice kitchen.

Gilbert vs McGill now. McGill has had the Bic out and now looks like Sean Dyche, complete with ginger DISC BEEEAAARD.

[sevendaughters]

genuinely amazed no one has had a word with Devlin.

[Blue Jam]

genuinely amazed no one has had a word with Devlin.

"YOU CAN'T EAT AT BURGER KING BRUV, DAT OFFENDS WIMMIN!"

Calling the journos who hounded Dominic Cummings hypocrites as well. He may be the Laurence Fox of the baize.

Ebdon may have retired but I suppose that Big Brexity meff Ali Carter could take him under his wing.

[Blue Jam]

So far this tournament has been more fun than this year's World Championship, seriously. Get on it you fuckers.

[Blue Jam]

genuinely amazed no one has had a word with Devlin.

Devlin playing Martin Gould now. Who knows, he may emerge a changed man. With a thousand-yard stare and more empathy for prostitutes.

Judd Trump has just dispatched Jackson Page. At least he won't need ID when he drowns his sorrows.

[Blue Jam]

Martin Gould now murdering Judd Trump in the semis!

[Blue Jam]

Final on now!

The Molesta vs The Murderer.

[Blue Jam]

DECIDER! When did Martin Gould get this good? Was it his new snooker spex or him feasting on the blood of his victims?

Will some of you effers watch this please?

Also if anyone is actually reading this a few tickets for next year's World Championship will be on sale tomorrow. See you there?

https://wst.tv/tickets/2021-betfred-world-snooker-championship/

[Blue Jam]

Bazza has the 'vid:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/snooker/54403443

Also Ronjo pulled out of the Championship League because players were required to isolate in groups of four and the last time he had to do this it really did his nut in. I can't say I blame him- imagine being cooped up with Shaun Murphy, John Higgins and Stuart Bingham. I'd be spraying air freshener and chugging Imodium.

[Blue Jam]

English Open starts today. Lovely Ding playing Si Jiahui now.

[Blue Jam]

Ronnie struggling against French child Brian Ochoiski but his nails are looking fabulous:



He's not just been getting bored in quarantine though, it's for a very good cause. Good on ya Ronjo:

https://mobile.twitter.com/ronnieo147/status/1315687682182385675

[Menu]

"...in support of breast cancer."

[Blue Jam]

Milky Bob Robert Milkins trailing Shaun Murphy by one frame, but a big spider (a live arachnid, not a long piece of wood with a metal bit used to assist with awkward cueing) was spotted under the table and AIDS was freaking out while Milky was unfazed. Monika Sulkowska had to be summoned to humanely dispatch the critter from the arena:

https://mobile.twitter.com/WeAreWST/status/1316053411565981696

"It's my weakness I'm afraid". Yes AIDS, that and a bit of hot young Christian Union crumpet.

[Blue Jam]

Decider! AIDS looking a bit jittery, he needs to keep his eyes on the table but can't stop watching the carpet...

[druss]

Assuming everyone has a price, how much do we think it would cost to ask Rob Walker to introduce him as AIDS Murphy? If I won the lottery it would be number one on my list.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

I want big pauses as well.

"..It's....AIDS....Murphy!"