Author Topic: Cheaply made disaster movies on Sony Movies Action  (Read 1189 times)

JesusAndYourBush

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Cheaply made disaster movies on Sony Movies Action
« on: January 18, 2020, 01:20:07 AM »
Has anyone seen any of the cheaply made disaster movies on Sony Movies Action (Freeview channel 40)?  They're almost a genre of their own.  Cheaply made, cheap effects, cheesy music, they all look like they're made by the same company although they're undoubtedly not.  They're all disaster movies of one sort or another, so the Earth is in danger from solar flares, volcano's, asteroids, some other freak weather condition, etc.  They're quite formulaic but I find them compelling viewing.  Plus they've started to get dafter.  The other day one called "Super Tanker" was utterly preposterous...  some people were trying to dispose of a cold-war-era weapon made from some substance harvested from a crashed asteroid, about 30-or-so test tubes full of a green liquid which we were told would cause a nuclear winter lasting 1000 years if handled wrongly.  They kept having to vent some deadly smoke to prevent the whole lot going BOOM. About 45 minutes in we were given the additional information that the smoke was antimatter, and 45 minutes later this was upgraded to dark matter.  Utterly nuts.

Yesterday we had "2012 Doomsday" involving the Mayan end of the world prophecy, with captions every so often telling us something like "22 hours until Doomsday" although rather than counting down during the course of the film like you'd expect, the number of hours until doomsday kept jumping up and down.  And it didn't appear the film was one of those trying to be clever by telling the story in non-chronological order, it just looked like incompetence.

Today we had something called "Snowmageddon" involving a snow-globe which when activated caused actual freakish weather type events to happen in a small village.

Some of these films are so naff they're unintentionally funny but I find them compelling viewing.  Any other fans?

Re: Cheaply made disaster movies on Sony Movies Action
« Reply #1 on: January 18, 2020, 09:15:50 AM »
Yes I find them compelling, if I were to watch a big cinema release I would critique as I watch it, but here I know what I'm getting from the first shot and I accept it. I watched one over Christmas with giant beetles in it, I expected the CGI to be a low key affair, it was and I didn't quibble, it added to the experience.

I'm also a sucker for Hallmark films,especially the Christmas variety, utterly harmless and endearing.

Alberon

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Re: Cheaply made disaster movies on Sony Movies Action
« Reply #2 on: January 18, 2020, 11:39:54 PM »
SYFY seemed to specialise in this sort of crap, in fact some of those listed sound like they came from there originally. The Asylum were producing knock-off films for years (Atlantic Rim, Battle for Los Angeles, Independents Day and Almighty Thor for example), but some of their 'original' disaster movies were better.

Unfortunately, they cottoned on to the fact that people were watching them as so-bad-they're-good and started to make them tongue in cheek. I lost all interest in them then.

JesusAndYourBush

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Re: Cheaply made disaster movies on Sony Movies Action
« Reply #3 on: January 19, 2020, 12:21:58 PM »
I watched one over Christmas with giant beetles in it

Sounds like "Damnation Alley"? (or did that have giant crabs/lobsters, I forget?)

Bad Ambassador

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Re: Cheaply made disaster movies on Sony Movies Action
« Reply #4 on: January 19, 2020, 12:25:40 PM »
Ahh, the film 20th Century Fox pegged as its big hit for summer 1977.

JesusAndYourBush

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Re: Cheaply made disaster movies on Sony Movies Action
« Reply #5 on: January 24, 2020, 12:47:51 AM »
Todays movie Arctic Blast (A solar eclipse sends a blast of super-chilled air toward Earth) contained two things which I've seen in several of these films.  (1) A young woman with diabetes who needs insulin (in Faultline it was mentioned a couple of times early on and then never mentioned again.), and (2) A man is in the process of divorcing his wife, but because of the trauma they go through in the course of the film, him saving her from some calamity etc, they realise they're still in love.

Tomorrows film Metal Tornado sounds suitable silly!

Oh and before and after every single ad break the sponsor is  "Casillero del Diablo, wine from the Devil's cellars" and I can't help chiming in every. single. time. with "wine from the Devil's dumplings!".

icehaven

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Re: Cheaply made disaster movies on Sony Movies Action
« Reply #6 on: January 24, 2020, 10:46:26 AM »
They do these on the Horror channel too, although often more the monster end of the genre. Sharknado, (in which it literally rains sharks that don't seem to need to be in water), another one about normal Sharks attacking people trapped in a collapsing seaside shopping mall after an earthquake, one about some giant green monsters from space that were the worst CGI you can possibly imagine on a film that was less than 5 years old.

One thing I often notice about them is how the otherwise unknown actors often slightly resemble a Hollywood A lister, so if you squint it's almost like you're watching a star studded blockbuster. There must be this army of second rate Brad Pitts and Ryan Reynoldses and the like who probably do a few films like this and TV pilots but never get any further for partly that reason.

Alberon

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Re: Cheaply made disaster movies on Sony Movies Action
« Reply #7 on: January 24, 2020, 11:32:05 PM »
The Sharknado films are from the point when they were being made as comedy films. I mean, three of them (THREE!) have cameos from fucking Jedward!




Jim Bob

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Re: Cheaply made disaster movies on Sony Movies Action
« Reply #8 on: January 25, 2020, 06:53:22 AM »
Oh and before and after every single ad break the sponsor is  "Casillero del Diablo, wine from the Devil's cellars" and I can't help chiming in every. single. time. with "wine from the Devil's dumplings!".

A fine vintage; £7 and 13.5%.  Gets you pissed without breaking the bank.  Class.

The Sharknado films are from the point when they were being made as comedy films. I mean, three of them (THREE!) have cameos from fucking Jedward!

Purposely bad movies are the worst.  The ‘so bad, it’s good’ flicks which work are the ones which try to be genuinely good but fail due to incompetence.  Movies which set out to be ‘so bad, it’s good’ never ever work.  They’re as boring as they are cynical.

icehaven

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Re: Cheaply made disaster movies on Sony Movies Action
« Reply #9 on: January 26, 2020, 08:52:25 PM »

Oh and before and after every single ad break the sponsor is  "Casillero del Diablo, wine from the Devil's cellars" and I can't help chiming in every. single. time. with "wine from the Devil's dumplings!".

The Devil's cellars would be a terrible place to store wine, being under Hell they'd be far too warm.

Re: Cheaply made disaster movies on Sony Movies Action
« Reply #10 on: January 27, 2020, 12:42:48 PM »
There was a whole series of these movies starring late 80s teenage pop stars Debbie Gibson or Tiffany, initially one or the other, then both. As though the burning desire to learn if Tiffany can act better than she can sing is sufficient to make you watch a movie that is otherwise intentionally bad in every way. On the other hand, some feature Eric Roberts.

Blumf

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Re: Cheaply made disaster movies on Sony Movies Action
« Reply #11 on: January 27, 2020, 01:15:12 PM »
The Devil's cellars would be a terrible place to store wine, being under Hell they'd be far too warm.

Not according to Dante: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inferno_%28Dante%29#Ninth_Circle_%28Treachery%29
Quote
At the base of the well, Dante finds himself within a large frozen lake: Cocytus, the Ninth Circle of Hell. Trapped in the ice, each according to his guilt, are punished sinners guilty of treachery against those with whom they had special relationships

But I don't think freezing temperatures are good for wine either.

Spoon of Ploff

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Re: Cheaply made disaster movies on Sony Movies Action
« Reply #12 on: January 27, 2020, 07:10:34 PM »
But I don't think freezing temperatures are good for wine either.


JesusAndYourBush

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Re: Cheaply made disaster movies on Sony Movies Action
« Reply #13 on: February 13, 2020, 02:08:25 PM »
Earthstorm (2006)
A lovely piece of hokum involving asteroids hitting the Moon and putting a massive crack in it so about a quarter of it was about to fall off and collide with the Earth causing an extinction-level event.  Starring Dirk Benedict as a military top brass who wants to use nukes when the scientists have better ideas.  We had the Apollo-13-style "we have to make something using only the stuff available to the astronauts", only instead of making an air filter they have to convert a nuke into some sort of EMP-type weapon to remagnetise the Moon's core to restabilise it.  Great stuff!  And you can tell it was made for TV because it was 4:3.

This evening we have Collision Earth (2011)
"The planet Mercury is struck by a solar flare that sends it on a collision course with Earth. A disgraced scientist must reactivate his defunct plans for a new weapons system to save the world, while an astronaut whose spaceship was orbiting Mercury faces a struggle to survive."

Famous Mortimer

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Re: Cheaply made disaster movies on Sony Movies Action
« Reply #14 on: February 13, 2020, 02:13:28 PM »
I made an attempt to watch / review every SyFy Channel original movie (which it seems most of these are)...but then I got bored and stopped about halfway through.

If you see "Dark Haul" on the listings, though, give it a spin as I remember it being excellent.

JesusAndYourBush

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Re: Cheaply made disaster movies on Sony Movies Action
« Reply #15 on: February 14, 2020, 12:25:54 AM »
^ Sounds like a goodun, I'll look out for it.

This evening we have Collision Earth (2011)
"The planet Mercury is struck by a solar flare that sends it on a collision course with Earth. A disgraced scientist must reactivate his defunct plans for a new weapons system to save the world, while an astronaut whose spaceship was orbiting Mercury faces a struggle to survive."

Oh, that was a good one.  Possibly one of the most way-out storylines they've done so far.  Utter bunkum, but quite entertaining.
In one bit, the magnetism of the planet Mercury (rapidly approaching Earth) is snatching cars up into the air and dropping them back down again.  There was a shot of a tractor being flipped over that looked like it'd been done on an Amiga.  Possibly the worst effect I've ever seen in a film.

JesusAndYourBush

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Re: Cheaply made disaster movies on Sony Movies Action
« Reply #16 on: Today at 02:24:31 AM »
Solar Flare (2008)

Another film abut solar flares.  A teenage prodigy discovers a way of predicting when solar flares will occur, then discovers a huge one is due to hit in 18 hours time!

The trailer just screams quality!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VjLLGBlb8Yo

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