Poll

Are we fucked?

Yes
15 (12%)
No
16 (12.8%)
If the virus doesn't kill us, the hysteria will
17 (13.6%)
Not arsed mate, cigs
9 (7.2%)
Who fucking cares
7 (5.6%)
With a little bit of caution and awareness it might be okay (chance would be a fine thing)
8 (6.4%)
It'll be fine eventually
6 (4.8%)
It'll be fine eventually (but not in our lifetime)
3 (2.4%)
With EVERYTHING else gone to shit anyway it's probably for the best
10 (8%)
It's fine
3 (2.4%)
Raoul Moat
18 (14.4%)
Wolves did it
5 (4%)
May not be fucked, but I actually hope we are and I’m a fucking huge narcissist
7 (5.6%)
Should we go full HUMAN CENTIPEDE to avoid bogroll crisis?
1 (0.8%)

Total Members Voted: 125

Author Topic: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH  (Read 86535 times)

imitationleather

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CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« on: January 22, 2020, 09:07:45 AM »
A new challenger in the race to be the worst thing this decade appears.

Here's some upsetting footage of the market it is rumoured to have originated from: https://edition.cnn.com/videos/world/2020/01/20/china-wuhan-origin-of-coronavirus-lu-stout-pkg-vpx.cnn/video/playlists/around-the-world/

Why don't they just eat normal stuff?

I reckon we're all doomed and may as well just give up now. Who's with me?

Barry Admin

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #1 on: January 22, 2020, 09:31:34 AM »
Stuff like this - and that story about Coca-Cola telling people to fuck off because consumers like the convenience of plastic bottles - clearly and irrefutably highlight that capitalism will wipe out our silly little species.

BlodwynPig

  • The Last Living Member of COVID-20
Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #2 on: January 22, 2020, 09:33:50 AM »
A new challenger in the race to be the worst thing this decade appears.

Here's some upsetting footage of the market it is rumoured to have originated from: https://edition.cnn.com/videos/world/2020/01/20/china-wuhan-origin-of-coronavirus-lu-stout-pkg-vpx.cnn/video/playlists/around-the-world/

Why don't they just eat normal stuff?

I reckon we're all doomed and may as well just give up now. Who's with me?

Hard Rock Hotel, Dublin?

buttgammon

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #3 on: January 22, 2020, 09:42:37 AM »
Hard Rock Hotel, Dublin?

I remember the graffiti on the walls around that which made it look like the woman on the hotel's advertising material had a massive dick hidden under her dress. Ahh, memories!

Stuff like this - and that story about Coca-Cola telling people to fuck off because consumers like the convenience of plastic bottles - clearly and irrefutably highlight that capitalism will wipe out our silly little species.

Fredric Jameson said it's easier to imagine the end of the world than the end of capitalism, and he wasn't wrong. The hideous thing is that in a lot of situations, it's both the kill and the cure, so people still find a way to make money out of the death and destruction wrought by capitalism run amok. There's always a way to profit.

Cuellar

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #4 on: January 22, 2020, 10:01:07 AM »
Are we all going to die of this one again?

Blumf

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #5 on: January 22, 2020, 10:07:09 AM »
SARS, Bird Flu, H5N1... these Hollywood reboots are getting out of hand.

Write some original diseases you lazy hacks!

Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #6 on: January 22, 2020, 10:11:12 AM »
The Mask IV

Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #7 on: January 22, 2020, 10:17:50 AM »
Coronavirus.... The names of these things always seem to be penalty kicks for Mock The Week/ 8 out ten cats joke writers. I think that's the real issue here.

Blumf

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #8 on: January 22, 2020, 10:49:26 AM »
They're even bottling the stuff!


Butchers Blind

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #9 on: January 22, 2020, 11:31:10 AM »
Lets hope this one works this time.  Too many false viruses before that have come to nothing.

madhair60

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #10 on: January 22, 2020, 11:49:37 AM »
DOM TORETTO ON SUICIDE WATCH

Blinder Data

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #11 on: January 22, 2020, 11:57:13 AM »
Found it boring tbh. Titus Andronicus was better

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #12 on: January 22, 2020, 12:09:23 PM »
I personally think it’s fantastic that new diseases are being invented all the time.  Keeps us on our toes (if we have any!!!).

Dewt

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #13 on: January 22, 2020, 12:11:30 PM »
This seems like the usual racist reporting on anything Chinese from Western news, TBH. Misleading as hell. They get a local expert on who says "I believe the virus spread from animals" and use it to imply that it came from this filthy Chinese market, doing filthy Chinese things like filthy Chineses like to do. It's not just abhorrent, it's also going to give you NEW SARS. Then they go to another market and basically say "no evidence, but it looks a little virusy".

I'm not saying that wild animals in Chinese markets don't cause disease but fuck me are CNN loving this and probably not the best source for accurate information on this, or anything. Facts? Pah, let's just make a racist case for where it could have come from and then run with that.

Can you imagine the same piece on foot and mouth disease showing the UK in a similar light?

Bennett Brauer

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #14 on: January 22, 2020, 12:20:30 PM »
They're even bottling the stuff!



Symptoms include sore throat, fever, nausea and disorientation, and it's the same with the coronavirus.

Writers: DAN BOWMAN, ROB COLLEY, ALAN CONNOR, KEVIN DAY, JAMES FARMER, ANDREW FAWN, ROBIN FLAVELL, DAN GASTER, KARL MINNS, GED PARSONS, GILES PILBROW, SHAUN PYE, PETE SINCLAIR, FRASER STEELE, COLIN SWASH

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #15 on: January 22, 2020, 12:25:08 PM »
Are we all going to die of this one again?

Not if you already died of the unpasteurised Brie.  Use your mind!

PlanktonSideburns

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #16 on: January 22, 2020, 12:29:28 PM »
I've seen the inside of our garbage food industry

We love digging on China for thing's we should be ashamed of in our country don't we?

Dewt

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #17 on: January 22, 2020, 12:30:23 PM »
But look at them, with their animals out in the open where you can see them... oh wait that's actually better, isn't it.

Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #18 on: January 22, 2020, 12:31:14 PM »
No concentration camps set up though, at least not on UK shoes.

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #19 on: January 22, 2020, 12:33:06 PM »
No concentration camps set up though, at least not on UK shoes.

‘Mouth’ is code for ‘concentration camps’, hence “foot in mouth disease”.  The camps aren’t set up on the shoes of those feet; think things through utilising your mind!

Kryton

  • Disregard the Constabulary
Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #20 on: January 22, 2020, 01:31:21 PM »
We'll find out in an hour if it's an INTERNATIONAL INCIDENT.

Exciting stuff.

Japan, Thailand, Taiwan and South Korea have reported cases.

EDIT: America too?

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/coronavirus-us-china-virus-wuhan-cdc-america-death-toll-a9295456.html?fbclid=IwAR0B7JrKY183-ku0oejr1Qj0yeDRw5VlHbmkZ6qwLfE2pKxiAOLSynPBo5A

Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #21 on: January 22, 2020, 01:48:41 PM »
I like the mid 90's Eurodance reference. Keep it up.

Dewt

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #22 on: January 22, 2020, 02:19:29 PM »
Disease from organism shite
all night
oh yeah

madhair60

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #23 on: January 22, 2020, 02:24:03 PM »
Der ner ner NA NA ner NA ner NA ner ner NA ner ner ner NA NA ner NA

DIED; CORONA

Captain Z

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #24 on: January 22, 2020, 02:30:16 PM »
Duh duh duhduh, duh duh duhduh, duh duh duhduh,

EVERYBODY COUGH NOW

Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #25 on: January 22, 2020, 02:49:58 PM »
Doo doo dooby doo, doo doo doo dooby dooby
C' COS YOU DIE ON TIME
DIE DIE DIE ON TIME

madhair60

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #26 on: January 22, 2020, 02:51:24 PM »
No no, no no no no, no no no no, no no there's no limit to the damage to your central nervous system

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #27 on: January 22, 2020, 03:07:44 PM »
We'll find out in an hour if it's an INTERNATIONAL INCIDENT.

Oh yes please please may it be forthwith granted INCIDENT status.

Head Gardener

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #28 on: January 22, 2020, 05:37:09 PM »

Mr_Simnock

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Re: CORONAVIRUS 2020: RHYTHM OF THE DEATH
« Reply #29 on: January 22, 2020, 05:54:42 PM »
Hopefully Biggy will join this thread and we can all discuss how to use the word 'pandemic' again, that was a great thread that...

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