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March 28, 2024, 11:49:17 AM

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winning the lottery

Started by kittens, February 10, 2020, 03:43:30 PM

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kittens

really really want to win the lottery. million buck cash injection direct into my bank account. dream come true lads always wanted to have fucking tonnes of money.

spent £20 on lottery tickets this weekend. i do not have a gambling problem i am treating myself. fantasising for days on end about leaving my job and becoming a tory. doing all kinds of lotterys, but the most exciting one is 'set for life' - if you win this one you get 10,000 pounds a month for 30 years. would be pretty nice.

how often do you need to play the lottery to win.
have you ever won the lottery

Lisa Jesusandmarychain

I once won 30 million pounds on the lottery, but spent it all on chips.

Shit Good Nose

The caretaker at one of the secondary schools about 8 miles away from where we live won £8million some years ago which I'm pretty sure statistically means that the odds of me winning the lottery are even more ridiculous again by ten-fold.

Course, you have to play it as well...


Most I've ever won is £72 on a single scratchcard that was bought for me.

imitationleather

Shouldn't have gone in on different lotteries. Schoolboy error. (Although schoolboys shouldn't be playing the lottery!) Pick one lottery and spend all you have on that. And I don't mean just £20. I mean everything you have.

Do it.

The Set For Life top prize is great. £3.6million overall but in £10k chunks so you don't blow it all on a yacht like a massive twat. Could easily convince family and friends that me and the missus got ace new jobs to cover for it. Lovely job.

kittens

if i ploughed all of the money i currently own into standard lottery tickets, i could get 103 lottery tickets! i would definitely win. but I'm too much of a coward to actually achieve my dreams. pathetic.

idunnosomename

gambling is a sin though, so you will go to hell

imitationleather

Quote from: idunnosomename on February 10, 2020, 04:03:55 PM
gambling is a sin though, so you will go to hell

Not if just before you die you spend some of your winnings on a big hammer to kill God with.

Inspector Norse

Quote from: Shit Good Nose on February 10, 2020, 03:47:55 PM
The caretaker at one of the secondary schools about 8 miles away from where we live won £8million some years ago which I'm pretty sure statistically means that the odds of me winning the lottery are even more ridiculous again by ten-fold.

Actually don't Maths Teachers always illustrate Probability by pointing out that the odds are exactly the same regardless?

QuoteMost I've ever won is £72 on a single scratchcard that was bought for me.

I got given scratchcards in the work Secret Santa once. I won 60SEK (about a fiver).

holyzombiejesus

If I won on the lottery, I would achieve my life's dream and buy Port Vale Football Club. If I got 4 numbers, I could buy us some new players as well!

Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth



Quote from: Huxleys Babkins on February 10, 2020, 03:58:25 PM
The Set For Life top prize is great. £3.6million overall but in £10k chunks so you don't blow it all on a yacht like a massive twat. Could easily convince family and friends that me and the missus got ace new jobs to cover for it. Lovely job.
I've never played the lottery, and I'm not about to start, but the guaranteed income aspect of that one does capture the imaginationin a way that the bigger jackpots don't. I heard somewhere that casinos also handle big payouts in monthly instalments.

kittens

i hate to admit it but it's actually extremely unlikely that i am going to win the lottery.

Famous Mortimer

Quote from: Inspector Norse on February 10, 2020, 04:22:14 PM
Actually don't Maths Teachers always illustrate Probability by pointing out that the odds are exactly the same regardless?
It's one of those things, like "what are the odds of flipping a coin and getting 50 heads in a row? Exactly the same as getting any other combination of heads and tails" .

imitationleather

Quote from: kittens on February 10, 2020, 04:48:18 PM
i hate to admit it but it's actually extremely unlikely that i am going to win the lottery.

Pffff. It is with that attitude!

Cardenio I

Set for life is wank - with inflation you're getting less and less every month. You win the normal Lottery, wack it in an index fund or whatever and get 10 grand piped out of that bad boy straight into your pocket every month, jobs a good'un, you're eating horses and riding lobster with the best of em.

Best wishes

Cardenio

Shit Good Nose

Quote from: Inspector Norse on February 10, 2020, 04:22:14 PM
Actually don't Maths Teachers always illustrate Probability by pointing out that the odds are exactly the same regardless?

Possibly.  I've always been rubbish at maths.  I don't think I was doing maths any more when the lottery started.


Quote
I got given scratchcards in the work Secret Santa once. I won 60SEK (about a fiver).

I'd love to win 60 sex, even if it is only a fiver's worth (single tug on the tadge?).


Quote from: kittens on February 10, 2020, 04:48:18 PM
i hate to admit it but it's actually extremely unlikely that i am going to win the lottery.

Bombshell.

thenoise

Use Martingale system think about it there are two outcomes to the lottery you either (i) win or (ii) lose. You are going through an unusually lengthy losing streak at the moment, you need to ride it out with a strategy for recouping your losses once your luck changes. You need to double your bet each time to cover both outcomes - winning or losing - so that your win covers your outgoings plus what you would (should) have won originally. So next time £40, £80, £160 if you're really going through a long unlucky streak, might even have to go to £320, £640...
Beg borrow or steal if you have to. It's a system that literally can't fail.

Source: I went to university and I'm really clever.

Pranet

With interest rates being what they are I sometimes think if you have savings you might as well convert them into premium bonds.

Shit Good Nose

Quote from: Pranet on February 10, 2020, 04:54:08 PM
With interest rates being what they are I sometimes think if you have savings you might as well convert them into premium bonds.

A sensible suggestion, especially if you have several thousand plus.

Icehaven

Set for Life is putting a lot of faith in nothing changing and there not being some reason it stops at some point before the 30 years is up. Also presuming it's non-transferable, if you die your family are going to potentially miss out on a good chunk of cash.

imitationleather

These things usually work by offering you a lump sum that works out as a lot less upfront to get around the issues of actually having to pay you every month for thirty years or however long it is.

kittens

i'm gonna feel terrible if i win set for life now. thanks guys :(

Armin Meiwes

#22
Urrrgh set for life SUCKS what am I meant to do with ten grand a month, buy a VW Polo or timeshare? I want it all I want it all and I want it now! *Brian May guitar solo*


Shoulders?-Stomach!

For 10,000 a month you could spend 20% of your regular income on renting a mediocre two bed flat in a middling area of London. But just think, only a further 2% would go on utilities, tax and insurance.

Mortimer

Statistically there's a greater chance of being murdered.

I still do it though. Won £3.50 on the Euromillions last Friday. Go me!

Ferris

Quote from: imitationleather on February 10, 2020, 04:04:58 PM
Not if just before you die you spend some of your winnings on a big hammer to kill God with.

Unnecessary. You just have to give him a cut (usually around 700 quid) to keep him sweet.

Pingers

Quote from: Mortimer on February 10, 2020, 08:14:46 PM
Statistically there's a greater chance of being murdered.

I still do it though. Won £3.50 on the Euromillions last Friday. Go me!

*ominous shadow is cast over Mortimer, who turns too late*

Ray Travez

Quote from: Huxleys Babkins on February 10, 2020, 03:58:25 PM
The Set For Life top prize is great. £3.6million overall but in £10k chunks so you don't blow it all on a yacht like a massive twat. Could easily convince family and friends that me and the missus got ace new jobs to cover for it. Lovely job.

All fine except that, after Brexit, £10k will just about be enough to buy you a second-hand tuba.

Ray Travez

The RTP (Return To Player) of the lottery is terrible. You're better off doing high-odds accumulators. Pick ten horses to win and put a quid on, that sort of thing.