Valentine's Day!!!!!

[paruses]

I wonder what my wife is doing today.....

Me. LOL

OR I'm doing her. FFS - this is not as snappy as i thought it would be.

Seriously though = best wishes.

[Icehaven]

We're going to Spoons, possibly double dating with Mr. H's brother and his girlfriend, which will be delightful as they literally never stop arguing. All these takeaways you're all having sound far more appealing, I might have to fake a fit of the vapours.

[Dex Sawash]

Naan Stop has sent me a 20% off code to use a dinner tonight. Might try the paneer bhurji.

[Cloud]

Roses are red
Violets are blue
This meme is fucking old
Potatoes

[Voltan (Man of Steel)]

I tell you what, I came downstairs this morning and I couldn't open my door!

https://trustedtraders.which.co.uk/

[bgmnts]

Struggle through this Malaysian Laksa Naked Soup, watch some shite on Netflix, possibly some horrible videos on youtube about disappearances and murders and then bed I suppose.

[idunnosomename]

I tell you what, I came downstairs this morning and I couldn't open my door!

what the fuck are you an idiot

[idunnosomename]

https://trustedtraders.which.co.uk/

phwoar. Great bunch of lads

[Blue Jam]

Two mains, two desserts, two drinks for £20 at 'spoons

(I wish)

[Shit Good Nose]

In related V-Day news, that fella that put up a billboard of himself looking all cool laying on his side and wearing sunglasses has landed an actual date.  On valentine's day!

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-south-yorkshire-51493282

[Huxleys Babkins]

In related V-Day news, that fella that put up a billboard of himself looking all cool laying on his side and wearing sunglasses has landed an actual date.  On valentine's day!

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-south-yorkshire-51493282

"It's just been crazy. I've been offered a role on the Channel 4 show Naked Attraction, which is hilarious."

A "role".

[Blue Jam]

Probably meant a "hole". For his nob, like.

[Shit Good Nose]

Or maybe he thinks it's a porn shoot.  Someone ought to tell him what's actually going to happen...

[Blue Jam]

I must confess I have never actually watched Nekkid Attraction and just assumed the contestants stand with their nobs/fannies behind a hole. I know I watch a lot of crap telly but that one's too tawdry even for me.

[Shit Good Nose]

I must confess I have never actually watched Nekkid Attraction and just assumed the contestants stand with their nobs/fannies behind a hole. I know I watch a lot of crap telly but that one's too tawdry even for me.

Ignoring EVERYTHING else about it, it's really really really dull.

[Huxleys Babkins]

"You'll stand next to Anna Richardson and talk about fannies in troubling detail. You'll want to get rid of the fat lass in round one, but you need to wait until later so you can say that you didn't like her sense of humour so you don't look shallow. You'll inevitably pick the fittest one there, but she won't actually fancy you back so the whole thing is a massive waste of your time. 2million people will see your disgusting naked body. You're welcome."

[Noonling]

Roses are red
Hearts can be also
I'm saving myself
for Gregory Torso

[Blue Jam]

Blue is for violets
Red is for roses
We're mental and bald
And we've all got phimosis

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Only got the missus some card and a cake lol bricking it lads

Any ideas

[Blue Jam]

Ironing board

[Cloud]

Blue is for violets
Red is for roses
We're mental and bald
And we've all got phimosis

Even the women?

[Looper]

I'm doing nothing.

How about you?

Treated myself to a chicken and mushroom pukka pie.

[Brian Freeze]

Roses are red,
Fish are much wetter,
You give good head,
But your sister is better.

[Pingers]

Treated myself to a chicken and mushroom pukka pie.

You can't fuck a pie! Oh wait, you can.

[Artie Fufkin]

My cock is disgusting
My cock is vile
Still, I'm gonna stick it
Into your pie-hole

[pancreas]

I have it on good authority that kittens just received a valentine's card.

[Custard]

I've pulled out just to type this xxx

[Looper]

You can't fuck a pie! Oh wait, you can.

I'm trying out something new.
The texture of Gregg's pasties got boring after a while.

[checkoutgirl]

Already had my Valentine's insertion.

What state is your arse in now?

[checkoutgirl]

after which we shall return home and make love.

With each other?