Author Topic: Valentine's Day!!!!!  (Read 1353 times)

Re: Valentine's Day!!!!!
« Reply #90 on: February 14, 2020, 08:48:18 PM »
dinosaur wedded to the trochaic whims

Dear Shoulders?-Stomach!

Kissing you is like playing very low stakes Barnsley poker: I don't know what I'm doing despite it being a piece of piss, and all that is on the table is a child's epipen and four prosthetic legs.
Deal.

Happy Valentines Day

GT x

Re: Valentine's Day!!!!!
« Reply #91 on: February 14, 2020, 08:58:12 PM »
What state is your arse in now?

Dear checkout girl,

You be the fat bastard, I'll be the tureen of tinned ravioli

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8TV4GQzgZwg

Happy Valebh G

GH x

touchingcloth

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Re: Valentine's Day!!!!!
« Reply #92 on: February 14, 2020, 09:29:17 PM »
These are wuv pwetzels, you can see anus through them.

Also they contain anus.

Re: Valentine's Day!!!!!
« Reply #93 on: February 14, 2020, 09:32:05 PM »
Get one of these



Who knows, in 9 months you might have one of these


Angrew Lloyg Wegger

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Re: Valentine's Day!!!!!
« Reply #94 on: February 14, 2020, 09:35:44 PM »
Just been for a very overpriced meal at an 'Italian' place on a retail park, now home to do a drinking and watch Seinfield on all4 and play on my guitar. Mrs Angrew has to do a night shift so guess who's winning? (me (except for being alone))

Blue Jam

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Re: Valentine's Day!!!!!
« Reply #95 on: February 14, 2020, 09:46:38 PM »
Get one of these



Anyone else suspect M&S just bought the unsold remnants of Aldi's two metre-long pigs-in-blankets, chopped them up and repackaged them in fancy boxes?

I don't trust that thing either way.

Re: Valentine's Day!!!!!
« Reply #96 on: February 14, 2020, 09:51:15 PM »
Yeah, I've piled a load of dead dogs outside it.
does his door open outwards?, asking for a murderer


chveik

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Re: Valentine's Day!!!!!
« Reply #97 on: February 14, 2020, 09:53:57 PM »
fuck I didn't even get a Greg Torso card

thenoise

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Re: Valentine's Day!!!!!
« Reply #98 on: February 14, 2020, 09:54:33 PM »
M&S meal for two, and a bottle of raspberry lemonade. My wife is a lucky woman.

Small Man Big Horse

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Re: Valentine's Day!!!!!
« Reply #99 on: February 14, 2020, 09:54:43 PM »
Dear Small Man Big Horse

let's get drunk together, and racist, no wait, not racist, let's get naturally intimate, let's get down low in the grass, the sun sinking, our shadows pulling out longer and longer, in limousine light of late evening, fingers fucking touching tips like shy school dance kids, let's get homophobic, no,  sorry again, not homophobic, let's get hydroponic, get wet and bloody and elongated, let's become worms and wriggle in sin together through the farmer's precious wheat fields, let's deny the holocaust, oh no why do i keep doing this, let's not deny the holocaust, let's frollic like leopards under a waterfall of welders sparks in an uninspected machine shop

Happy Voldemorts Day

GT x

Dear Mr Torso,

My client wishes you to know that he will deny the holocaust all fucking day long with you the moment his current partner discovers his posts on CaB and dumps him. Until that he day he denies knowing you.

Love and kisses,
SMBH's Lawyer

Cerys

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Re: Valentine's Day!!!!!
« Reply #100 on: February 14, 2020, 10:14:04 PM »
SNG is spending his Friday nights as he usually does - he's gone to visit his fancy woman.  We did discuss him not going, but we never bother with Valentine;s day anyway, so what the hell.  I'm sitting in my tiny office getting to grips with Blender.  It's definitely improved since 2010.

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