Characters you're supposed to like that you just ... don't

[Cerys]

Currently embarked on yet another playthrough of FFVII, and there is no escaping the fact that I can't stand Aerith.  Her insistence on being a love interest I could just about cope with were it not for the passive aggressive borderline sexual predator factor.  'Oh yes, Cloud, you've shown no interest in me whatsoever - so obviously I must insinuate my way into your hotel room and drag you out on a shitty date when you're trying to sleep off the days of hardship leading up to this point.  What, you say?  You wanted a date with one of the others?  Well, Cloud, that's just tough.  Because I'm so sweet and pink and insistent that there is no way you can get out of this.  Even keeping me dead for the majority of the action is no guarantee.  You're stuck with me right up until the point in the game when Sephiroth perforates me right under the tits.  And even then I'm going to stick around for airy fairy guilty wilty aspects of plot'!

And don't even get me started on Lydia.  Yes, bitch, you are sworn to carry my burdens.  So shut your snarky gob and get hefting.

And ... breathe.

[bgmnts]

Anyone in any final fantasy game really exceptVIII and IX.

Are you meant to like Otacon in MGS? I hate Otacon.

Link is shit too.

[Dewt]

Currently embarked on yet another playthrough of FFVII, and there is no escaping the fact that I can't stand Aerith.  Her insistence on being a love interest I could just about cope with were it not for the passive aggressive borderline sexual predator factor.  'Oh yes, Cloud, you've shown no interest in me whatsoever - so obviously I must insinuate my way into your hotel room and drag you out on a shitty date when you're trying to sleep off the days of hardship leading up to this point.  What, you say?  You wanted a date with one of the others?  Well, Cloud, that's just tough.  Because I'm so sweet and pink and insistent that there is no way you can get out of this.  Even keeping me dead for the majority of the action is no guarantee.  You're stuck with me right up until the point in the game when Sephiroth perforates me right under the tits.  And even then I'm going to stick around for airy fairy guilty wilty aspects of plot'!

And don't even get me started on Lydia.  Yes, bitch, you are sworn to carry my burdens.  So shut your snarky gob and get hefting.

And ... breathe.

She has the energy of the person at a wedding who tries to force people to dance when they do not want to, as if they simply did not realise that they were allowed to dance and she is delivering this news to them.

[Cerys]

She must be stopped.  Fortunately she is.

Anyone in any final fantasy game really exceptVIII and IX

Selphie?  Die in a fire, you perky stupid-haired Garden-Festival-obsessed hosebeast.

[jobotic]

Erm....

Chuckie Egg? More like Cuntie Egg

[Egyptian Feast]

I married Lydia. Can't remember why, since I would have been well aware how useless she was by that point in the game.

Conor from Assassin's Creed 3 was a complete dullard and I far preferred his Tory dad, which is quite an achievement considering what a wank he was.

[Lemming]

Everyone in Mass Effect. Literally every character who appears on screen, to varying extents.

Anyone in any final fantasy game really exceptVIII and IX.

Everyone in IV is cool and VI is pretty much an even split between cool people and people who should get to fuck.

[Egyptian Feast]

My partner says Preston from Fallout 4. "I found another settlement that could use our help". Away with you, cunt.

[bgmnts]

She must be stopped.  Fortunately she is.

Selphie?  Die in a fire, you perky stupid-haired Garden-Festival-obsessed hosebeast.

You need the stupidly optimistic character to balance out the brooding deso of the half of the cast.

[bgmnts]

Everyone in Mass Effect. Literally every character who appears on screen, to varying extents.

Mordin and Wrex are ace!

[Mister Six]

My partner says Preston from Fallout 4. "I found another settlement that could use our help". Away with you, cunt.

Wouldn't be quite so bad if those requests didn't queue up, and if there were a functioning dialogue tree. As it is, when you need to talk to him for any reason after leaving him alone for a bit you have to shovel through an Augean Stable's worth of side quest backlog.

Such a shittily designed game in so many ways.

[bgmnts]

Bethesda are just mostly crap at makingcharacters in my opinion.

[C_Larence]

Anyone from Borderlands
Anyone from Apex Legends
Anyone from any game that's popular on reddit.

[Cerys]

Bethesda are just mostly crap at makingcharacters in my opinion.

I disagree.  They're very good at making unpleasant characters.  Case in point - Nazeem.

[Bazooka]

Anyone from Borderlands
Anyone from Apex Legends
Anyone from any game that's popular on reddit.

Second Borderlands, especially the Joe Pasquale dlc.

[Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth]

I've not played Destiny, but I remember seeing a trailer in which the hero characters were fighting big monsters while casually trading quips with each other. I assume they were supposed to come across as cool, but I thought they just seemed like a bunch of smug tossers.

[H-O-W-L]

The main cast in Halo 3: ODST, aside from the mute Rookie, whom is shown to be a contemplative and introspective soul with a keen eye for analysis and detective work, far beyond his ROOTIN TOOTIN OORAH GO GO GO POUND EM MARINES OOH RAH CLOPPITY HOP TO THE BARBER SHOP TANGO TANGO VECTOR VICTOR mates who are all basically James Cameron stereotypes.

It's shocking and sad because Halos 1 2 and 3 actually really don't have stereotypical characters whatsoever. Captain Keyes is a well-rounded bloke for the short screentime he gets, Miranda Keyes is a surprisingly well-written, non-sexualized, non-romanticized woman in authority, Cortana isn't an expository wankdoll like she looks.. shit, even Sergeant Johnson has a lot of pathos and intrigue to him. The Arbiter is also very interesting too.

Then in ODST we have Snarky But Cool Sniper, Wicked Tweaker Bomb Man, Big Shouty Heavy Weapon Bloke, Coolhead Commander, and Betrayer Spy Woman. It's all very cliche. Which is a shame, because the BEST CHARACTER IN THE HALO SERIES appears in ODST, namely the Superintendent.

[bgmnts]

Then in ODST we have Snarky But Cool Sniper, Wicked Tweaker Bomb Man, Big Shouty Heavy Weapon Bloke, Coolhead Commander, and Betrayer Spy Woman. It's all very cliche. Which is a shame, because the BEST CHARACTER IN THE HALO SERIES appears in ODST, namely the Superintendent.

Isn't it the same with Halo: Reach too?

[wooders1978]

Nathan drake
2B - Nier automata
Any outer worlds follower

[ToneLa]

Mauro Icardi. Signed him to Liverpool in PES2020 and he's boss on pitch but his score celebration is fucking naff. Hands behind his ears and maw open, what the Christing fuck on a cracker is that all about?

[Jerzy Bondov]

Dom in Gears of War. I don't know why but I really took against him. I am glad his wife died. Meathead cunt.

[beanheadmcginty]

Ricky Gervais in GTA.

[Cerys]

Yeah, but at least you can kill him.

[H-O-W-L]

Isn't it the same with Halo: Reach too?

Yup. Shit game too.

[ToneLa]

Ghandi in Civ.

Look, I hate Ghandi. There, I said it.

[Pink Gregory]

Dom in Gears of War. I don't know why but I really took against him. I am glad his wife died. Meathead cunt.

Had this happen when playing co op just after he shoots her

Marcus Fenix : "She's in a better place now."
M'colleague : "...Splattered all over the wall."

[Pink Gregory]

Yup. Shit game too.

I fell asleep playing ODST

[C_Larence]

2B - Nier automata

I considered saying this too, but I'm not actually certain we're meant to ever like her.

[Consignia]

I'm playing through Nier Automata at the moment. I don't mind 2B she's just a neutral audience surrogate shoved into a latex sex-doll. But 9S, he did my head in. Until route B,

Spoiler alert

after playing as him, I actually quite like him. Pity I don't like the hacking mechanic.

[close]

[shh]

Latter day Lara, God of War bairn, twat Drake.