Cricket thread 2020: executing our skillsets

[gilbertharding]

https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2021/jun/14/graham-thorpe-the-hundred-can-help-england-struggling-test-batsmen

Graham Thorpe backs the Hundred to help England's struggling Test batsmen

Fuuuuuckofffffff.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Decrepit UKIP gammon miser and his legacy of failure.

Maybe he thinks the Hundred refers to runs rather than balls.

[Cuellar]

The Guardian's The Spin calling for Root's head. I liked this comment:

Guardian Pick

I live in Joe Root's hometown but I have to agree with this.

OH well then!

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Scary to think that the only possible replacement captain is Rory Burns, which would signal a Daren Ganga level decline.

Broad and Anderson could have done it possibly, but too damn old. Don't give it to the all-rounder Stokes either, learn the lessons of history.

[Cuellar]

Make fucking Bracey do it, who gives a shit

[Wentworth Smith]

Scary to think that the only possible replacement captain is Rory Burns, which would signal a Daren Ganga level decline.

Broad and Anderson could have done it possibly, but too damn old. Don't give it to the all-rounder Stokes either, learn the lessons of history.

It would be Buttler wouldn't it? Vice captain for the shorter formats, no skeletons.

The bigger problem is Silverwood as coach/selector. Some woeful excuses after every defeat, terrible selections. Morgan runs the one dayers and T20 so he doesn't do much there and his test run has been woeful but he seems to have grabbed himself more power. Not sure how he can be head selector, he probably isn't travelling round the country to scout anyone and as a coach we have the batsmen looking worse than they have in twenty years.

[sevendaughters]

It would absolutely be Buttler. They love him and his whole RAF officer shtick.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

He would be even worse than Root.

[Chedney Honks]

Buttler needs a pencil moustache and braces.

What about Nuno?

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/cricket/56972045

Got 95, fucking

Spoiler alert

Craig Overton

[close]

the only miss.

[iamcoop]

Couldn't help but laugh at this tweet earlier from George Dobell

"Jonny Bairstow has just screamed in pain and collapsed in completing a single at New Road."

There's more to the tweet but it seems funnier just to end it there.

[Satchmo Distel]

Bairstow seems a decent person, irrespective of his failings as a Test batsman, and he had to cope with a horrendous family tragedy as a kid. There are many bigger villains in the game.

[sevendaughters]

I heard from a friend who used to work with his ex that he is not a particularly nice person and used to make her walk behind him in public in case people thought they were together!

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

https://www.espncricinfo.com/story/joe-clarke-to-face-trial-for-affray-following-powys-incident-1266869

Fuck sake. Sounds like a delightful family. Preferred him when he was competitive shagging.

[Harry Badger]

He was very close to a call up in the 2018 series against India - was withdrawn from his county to net at Edgbaston but they went with Pope. I imagine that's it for him as far as playing for England is concerned, unless the apparently intra-family scrap was over a much-prized external hard drive.

Anyone been watching the women's test? The fears over the used pitch seem to be unfounded as it's turning into a properly good game. The balance of power has shifted three times alone in the second day.

Finally - my team played a local league game tonight and somehow conceded 49 extras while keeping the oppo down to 115.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Imagine most of those were byes...? I guess if the bowling is awful and there's a standin wicketkeeper or a dodgy wicket a good 9 or 10 balls will go straight through to the boundary over the course of an evening game.

[Harry Badger]

I think there were 9 byes, two of which were straight to the boundary. Our keeper is pretty good but it was wides that screwed us (31) as they use the strict legside wide interpretation and some of our bowlers just can't bowl straight enough. Plus we had a genuine quick.

Still, we won quite comfortably in the end, which is more than can be said for our game a couple of weeks ago. The oppo were a man short and roped in a bloke passing by in shorts and t-shirt. I'm not going to mention his name as he was almost certainly in breach of his contract, but he's a professional rugby player with a very, very, VERY famous cricketing grandfather. Smashed 50 off 20 balls, bowled sharply off two paces and saved about thirty in the field.

[sevendaughters]

Test final starts belatedly. Both teams look set on playing their signature way.

[rjd2]

Slightly annoying this climate and they have came of a little to softly for my liking but it is what it is.

Never sure of India in this scenario as Rahane is so disgustingly inconsistent, Pant a madman and the lower order from hell, seems nicely poised nonetheless.

[Harry Badger]

Olly Stone out for rest of the season with lower vertebrae FUCKDOWN https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/cricket/57538254

[Inspector Norse]

Kent have just scored 236 in the T20. Joe Denly got 8 off 12 balls.

[iamcoop]

Proper fucking batting from NZ.

Imagine us seeing out today. We'd be 54-6 by now.

[badaids]

I think there were 9 byes, two of which were straight to the boundary. Our keeper is pretty good but it was wides that screwed us (31) as they use the strict legside wide interpretation and some of our bowlers just can't bowl straight enough. Plus we had a genuine quick.

Still, we won quite comfortably in the end, which is more than can be said for our game a couple of weeks ago. The oppo were a man short and roped in a bloke passing by in shorts and t-shirt. I'm not going to mention his name as he was almost certainly in breach of his contract, but he's a professional rugby player with a very, very, VERY famous cricketing grandfather. Smashed 50 off 20 balls, bowled sharply off two paces and saved about thirty in the field.

Was it Jim Botham?

[rjd2]

It be nice for NZ to win this. They have been really consistent last few years but struggle to get long series v the glamour boys and are constantly seen as an afterthought.

In Jamieson, finally they have a a bowler who could be very destructive in Australia.

Not seen much from India to concern England, the batting line up is flimsy , aging and LOL at the tail enders ,,,Bumrah looked meh today also.

[Harry Badger]

Was it Jim Botham?

Aye. In the old days of dual sportsman, I've no doubt he'd play both games to a high standard. His dad was looking to go that way but had to go with rugby.

[Inspector Norse]

Not seen much from India to concern England, the batting line up is flimsy , aging and LOL at the tail enders ,,,Bumrah looked meh today also.

Yeah the tail was pretty dodgy: Bumrah is a natural number 12 batsman and somehow India have managed to find someone worse than him.

That said mate, it's England. The opposition just finding the ground and remembering their kit is enough to worry me.

[iamcoop]

Anyone been watching the women's test? The fears over the used pitch seem to be unfounded as it's turning into a properly good game. The balance of power has shifted three times alone in the second day.

The women's test was a fantastic game. And that was in spite of the ECB.

They'll probably swerve any criticism for providing the women's team with a used pitch because it happened to play well.

In reality they ought to be ashamed of themselves.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

England can't bat so unless they prepare 5 green tops they will lose or be outplayed and saved by the weather.

[Thursday]

Who's the idiot that decided the world test final should be in a country where it rains 75% of the time anyway. There's other neutral venues.

[sevendaughters]

Top creekit from Kane here