Author Topic: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II  (Read 32726 times)

Botty Cello

  • dyslexic
Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #90 on: December 18, 2020, 08:01:55 PM »
When the extremely dead pan Michael Redmond  wearing a flasher’s mac came on stage, paused a long while and said “Whatever happened to Kajagoogoo”. Many years later I heard another stand up say it was the best opening line he’d ever heard, so it wasn’t just me. Out of date now, but he's only just stopped touring.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RnrHaMa4xnE&t=241s

Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse

  • Living proof of everything wrong with the world
Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #91 on: December 18, 2020, 09:55:39 PM »
Bingeing my way through Big Mouth and so far the only line that's made me chuckle is midway through season two, when a documentary narrator announces "And now the birds begin to FUCK."

Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #92 on: December 19, 2020, 09:04:33 AM »
"You'll have to speak up, I'm wearing a towel"

The thing I like about it the most is it's almost ZAZ level silliness.  See also farting and turning up the volume control to mask the smell.

Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #93 on: December 19, 2020, 10:11:35 AM »
'Ahhh!  Scarred for life!  I am the Elephant Man!'-Rik in Young Ones when he scalds himself by spilling a hot drink.

Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #94 on: December 19, 2020, 12:10:46 PM »
"You'll have to speak up, I'm wearing a towel"

The thing I like about it the most is it's almost ZAZ level silliness.  See also farting and turning up the volume control to mask the smell.

I'd forgotten that and its brilliant.

Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse

  • Living proof of everything wrong with the world
Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #95 on: December 26, 2020, 11:40:29 PM »
https://www.instagram.com/p/CIhaSPZBY7Y/

Panel 9: "Stop crying about your fucking daughter, you sad old piece of shit! I'm on the fucking Zoom!"

The Mollusk

  • spirit ditties of no tone
Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #96 on: January 03, 2021, 01:17:04 PM »
"You'll have to speak up, I'm wearing a towel"

The thing I like about it the most is it's almost ZAZ level silliness.  See also farting and turning up the volume control to mask the smell.

There’s been speculation that this was in reference to how people with long hair would have impaired hearing due to having a towel wrapped around the wet hair, but I’m pretty sure this was recently put to one of the writers and he said that, no, actually it’s just a simple bit of pointless absurdism. Obviously it’s better because of that.

Zetetic

  • I wasn't supposed to be around this long, so…
Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #97 on: January 04, 2021, 09:36:22 AM »
If you're thinking of Josh Weinstein, he didn't know, I'm afraid:
https://twitter.com/Joshstrangehill/status/1341142748854845442

Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #98 on: January 06, 2021, 12:28:54 AM »
Just popped into my brain, apropos of nothing, from Newsradio:

Dave: I need a little time to think of, you know, le mot juste.
Bill: More juice! I hear ya.

madhair60

  • わたしは価値がないと感じます
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Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #99 on: February 27, 2021, 06:06:51 PM »
It's funny 'cos normally they do it at midnight but it's like eleven... it's like eleven-fifteen. What time is it in Japan? Fuckin' turn that up, I love that groovin'.... what kind of music is that? Like a bossa nova beat?

Moltar

  • dee dee dee dee dee dee
Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #100 on: March 04, 2021, 08:49:23 PM »
Delocated: "You're a terrible friend, Mike. You got no idea what that cereal is about!"

Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #101 on: March 07, 2021, 01:49:44 PM »
"I'm committed to cakes".

kalowski

  • Maclunkey
Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #102 on: March 07, 2021, 04:47:37 PM »
"I'm committed to cakes".
I think my favourite line from that is "You'd think wouldn't you, that having so many cooks would make it better, but no, it's making it worse."

Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #103 on: March 08, 2021, 09:40:39 AM »
Fallout Boy: Billowing backpacks Radioactive Man, it's the worst villain of them all, the Scoutmaster!
Radioactive Man: I see him, Fallout Boy.
Scoutmaster: Go get 'em, scouts. Don't be afraid to use your nails, boys!


Chollis

  • Master of Codes
Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #104 on: March 08, 2021, 03:27:22 PM »
Probably more for the "lines that form part of your inner monologue" thread but this sentence often pops into my head when something confounds me:

The piano DUNNN and then "How....could this have happened" from the start of the Clayton Bigsby sketch: https://youtu.be/BLNDqxrUUwQ?t=68

Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #105 on: March 09, 2021, 11:17:29 AM »
Fallout Boy: Billowing backpacks Radioactive Man, it's the worst villain of them all, the Scoutmaster!
Radioactive Man: I see him, Fallout Boy.
Scoutmaster: Go get 'em, scouts. Don't be afraid to use your nails, boys!



One of my favourite moments, though I've always wondered if they ought to have called him the Campmaster.

Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #106 on: March 21, 2021, 08:59:48 AM »
From the games when John Clarke and his team have a four corners-style documentary made about them.

"Well, it's a sad thing to have to say about someone who's really been a close friend for nearly 30 years, but I had to answer the question. Did I believe Allan Ronaldson was a dishonest, untrustworthy, treacherous, lying thief? And I had to say... yes."

Also the totally unconvincing way he shakes his head sadly at the end just kills me:


petrilTanaka

  • Are we counting shites?
Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #107 on: March 21, 2021, 10:54:21 AM »
One of my favourite moments, though I've always wondered if they ought to have called him the Campmaster.

I think Scoutmaster is a perfect 60s Batman name really. On the other hand, I like Campmaster. I think it's funnier because it's like a really dreggy name. like all the scout/gay gimmick names have been done to death, no point trying, edit the gimmick down to two words, cigs, pub. the Poundstretcher toy approach to intellectual property

DoesNotFollow

  • Everybody in the whole of NASA was in the pork pie
Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #108 on: March 23, 2021, 03:09:40 PM »
I watched Home Alone the other day, for the first time since I was a kid, and one bit had me in fits. After Kevin has sprung all his traps and made his escape on an improvised zipline, the battered, burnt and bruised burglars are at the window:

Harry: Where'd he go?
Marv: Maybe he committed suicide.

It's the combination of wishful thinking and incomprehensible logic behind Marv's notion. Most I've laughed in aaages.

Jerzy Bondov

  • best not bother
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Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #109 on: March 26, 2021, 11:48:56 AM »
I watched Home Alone the other day, for the first time since I was a kid, and one bit had me in fits. After Kevin has sprung all his traps and made his escape on an improvised zipline, the battered, burnt and bruised burglars are at the window:

Harry: Where'd he go?
Marv: Maybe he committed suicide.

It's the combination of wishful thinking and incomprehensible logic behind Marv's notion. Most I've laughed in aaages.
Yes! I love that line.

Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #110 on: April 11, 2021, 07:52:18 PM »
Rick: "Neil, the bathroom's free, unlike the country under the Thatcherite junta."

ETA: I have too many favourite Simpsons quotes to mention. Bart reading off Homer's cue cards and going, "Hello, Mr...Kurns? I bad want...money now. Me sick. So pick please me, Mr Burns," always makes me laugh.

earl_sleek

  • National Program Director of the CHUM Group
Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #111 on: April 11, 2021, 08:06:44 PM »
That's reminded me of Charlie's mom's speech from the Always Sunny episode where the'yre trying to scam people by pretending she has cancer:

"Thank you all for coming to our Beef and Beer and Jesus. As you know, I'm as sick as a three-legged dog on the streets of India. Any minute, my lungs are going to sizzle, pop, and disintegrate into a liquid lung and organ gumbo soup....Give me money. Money me. Money now. Me a money needing a lot now."


Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #112 on: April 11, 2021, 10:53:11 PM »
ETA: I have too many favourite Simpsons quotes to mention. Bart reading off Homer's cue cards and going, "Hello, Mr...Kurns? I bad want...money now. Me sick. So pick please me, Mr Burns," always makes me laugh.

It's Homer's off-screen "Ooh, he card read good" that does it for me.

The Mollusk

  • spirit ditties of no tone
Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #113 on: April 12, 2021, 05:03:53 PM »
IT'S KURNS, STUPID!

bgmnts

  • Depressed to the point of poisonous toxicity.
Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #114 on: April 15, 2021, 01:21:47 PM »
Quote from: Dave Chappelle
Take care Mr N word

amateur

  • Not feeling it, tbh
Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #115 on: April 16, 2021, 06:17:57 PM »
Troy: "I attack them, using my... additional notes!"

Abed: "It has no effect."

Ornlu

  • I'm lyrical
Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #116 on: April 28, 2021, 09:17:45 PM »
Youtuber Drew Gooden: "People say breakfast is the most important meal of the day, but I think dinner is at least in the top three."

kalowski

  • Maclunkey
Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #117 on: April 28, 2021, 09:40:16 PM »
P I T H E R ...  as in Brotherhood, but with PI instead of the BRO and no HOOD.

petrilTanaka

  • Are we counting shites?
Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #118 on: May 21, 2021, 11:44:23 AM »
neil just casually asking

Quote
Was it you that farted, Mike?


in Boring

Re: Comedy lines that just tickle the shit out of you Mk.II
« Reply #119 on: June 21, 2021, 06:01:34 PM »
Kevin Nealon's "You got a minute?" every time he's on a chat show just as he goes to tell a story.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xDqVXg1nYS4

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