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Good news thread

Started by Danger Man, March 16, 2020, 11:58:09 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Danger Man

It can't all be bad news, can it? So in the spirit of the Blitz here's a thread to highlight the good news.

No pubs means people like  me will lose weight and become more healthy.

The pound is tanking on the currency markets which means people can buy pounds on the cheap. Good news for some.


Ummmm......... over to you





shiftwork2

Conspicuously cheap petrol.  I'm sure this is what the planet would have wanted.

purlieu

Several months of lockdown will tank the economy so far that money will become worthless and everything will be free!

Shoulders?-Stomach!

People without savings will have as much savings as people who currently have savings. Hurray!

Fambo Number Mive

Grand National is cancelled, prolonging the life of some horses.

Bazooka

Pasta will become a currency, a lasagne sheet being the highest denomination.

holyzombiejesus

Jeremy Corbyn can't get bamlemmed for any of this.

Danger Man

Quote from: Fambo Number Mive on March 17, 2020, 08:01:49 AM
Grand National is cancelled, prolonging the life of some horses.

Maybe. A horse that isn't making any money might well find it's going to the pet food factory.

Buelligan

Quote from: Bazooka on March 17, 2020, 09:02:25 AM
Pasta will become a currency, a lasagne sheet being the highest denomination.

I make my own pasta, literally, a licence to print money.

Danger Man

Islamic State has told its followers not to travel to Europe to do any Jihads because of the virus.

Good news of sorts.

bgmnts

China has already smashed this so that's legit good news.

QDRPHNC

Can I just be a saddo for a moment and say that it struck me this morning that I would be a lot lonelier right now without CaB. It's nice to have such a group to laugh / cry / joke about people dying with.

Quote from: QDRPHNC on March 17, 2020, 01:32:46 PM
Can I just be a saddo for a moment and say that it struck me this morning that I would be a lot lonelier right now without CaB. It's nice to have such a group to laugh / cry / joke about people dying with.

If an apocalyptic virus
Crashes into us
To die by your side
Is such a heavenly way to die

Ambient Sheep

Quote from: holyzombiejesus on March 17, 2020, 09:06:46 AM
Jeremy Corbyn can't get bamlemmed for any of this.

Yes!  Have been thinking that myself.  Can you imagine the media bamlemming going on right now if he were PM?


EDIT: Only just noticed that you used "bamlem" too!  I didn't notice until after I hit Post, my brain just read it as "blamed"!

jobotic

it would be called Corbyn-19 by all the usual suspects wouldn't it?

He'd have gulagged the fucker by now.

chveik

Quote from: Ambient Sheep on March 17, 2020, 02:41:22 PM
Can you imagine the media bamlemming going on right now if he were PM?

yeah but the crisis would've been handled much more competently.

still, good news about the chocolate oranges.

Stoneage Dinosaurs

I've got the rest of the week off work!!! Thansk you Carl you magnificent bastard, long as you don't kill Corbyn or my grandma you'll be alright in my books :)


Inspector Norse

We have our first celebrity survivor![nb]that I have noticed in any case[/nb] Juventus substitute Daniele Rugani is apparently feeling fine after being the first top-level footballer to test positive last week.

The reports that teammate Cristiano Ronaldo was set to convert his chain of luxury hotels into quarantine and treatment centres proved sadly to be fake news, though.

Thomas

There's going to be loads of useful footage of world leaders talking about 'the virus' for the next wave of zombie blockbusters.

madhair60

Here's some good news; I, madhair60, the worst poster on CaB, may die


Buelligan

Quote from: madhair60 on March 17, 2020, 07:24:55 PM
Here's some good news; I, madhair60, the worst poster on CaB, may die

I don't think you're the worst.  One of the worst might be more realistic.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Vaccine available in 12 months, ze dokters zay

jobotic

Quote from: madhair60 on March 17, 2020, 07:24:55 PM
Here's some good news; I, madhair60, the worst poster on CaB, may die

Oh shurrup, you're great. That's BAD news



Zetetic

Quote from: Danger Man on March 16, 2020, 11:58:09 PM
It can't all be bad news, can it? So in the spirit of the Blitz here's a thread to highlight the good news.

Good news: Actually very few people died in the Blitz (given the context).