A Song For Europe 1980

[DrGreggles]

https://youtu.be/e1K0oYxMvGg

That's what I'm watching tonight.

[BlodwynPig]

It's shite, don't bother

[DrGreggles]

I'm hoping for really shite.

[DrGreggles]

Song 1
Don't Throw Your Love Away by a poor man's Racey*.
Contains barely any words that aren't the title.
(*maybe it WAS Racey - they probably needed this gig by 1980)

Song 2
Happy Everything by Maggie Moon
Wogan says that she's 16 (probably a BBC catchphrase at the time), but you'd swear she was pushing 40.

Song 3
Easy by Plain Sailing
Pastel suit cunts.
Singer looks like an angry Bryan Ferry/Elton Welsby.

Song 4
Here We'll Stay by Sonia Jones
So blatantly miming that the worst thing about this is somehow not her atrocious 'holiday hair'.

Song 5
Love Enough For Two by Prima Donna
Possibly the wettest 3 minutes on record.
Still, Kate Robbins looked quite foxy back then.

Song 6
Symphony For You by Jacqui Scott
Another 16 year old dressed like your nan!
A ballad so dreary that even Celine Dion would tell it to fuck off.

Song 7
Love Is Alive by Duke & The Aces
Good God...
Clearly introduced by Wogan as "3 boys and 2 girls" despite there being 6 of them.

Song 8
Everything's Alright by Roy Winston
The definition of the phrase 'punchable face'.
Don't think he's played piano before.

Song 9
Love Comes Love Grows by Midnight
Imagine a shit version of Dollar that have been at an office-themed funeral.
Well, this is even shitter than that.

Song 10
Gonna Do My Best by The Main Event
(AKA Cheryl Baker: The Wilderness Years)
I think they're trying to be a less funky version of The Dooleys and, to be fair, they succeeded.

Song 11
I Want To Be Me - Pussyfoot
Shit, it's Toyah!
Oh, it's OK, it's just another woman doing that crazy eyes thing.

Song 12
Surrender by Kim Clark
This one is 19 years old, so obviously she looks like Joan Collins' drunk mum.
Apparently she was a late replacement for the New Seekers. All of 'em.

Winner: Johnny Logan

[DrGreggles]

And it ended in a draw and, with no contingency plan in place, a glorious shambles ensued!

From Wikipedia:
"Owing to a tie break and with the live show quickly running out of time, a clearly flustered Terry Wogan, unsure of what to do in this unprecedented circumstance, returned to the 14 juries who were hastily asked to pick their favorite between songs two and five. Some juries ignored their previous voting and switched allegiance to Prima Donna who won by eight votes to six."

[dr beat]

This sounds like a contender for a Chart Music spinoff

[kaprisky]

Song 1
Don't Throw Your Love Away by a poor man's Racey*.
Contains barely any words that aren't the title.
(*maybe it WAS Racey - they probably needed this gig by 1980)

That is Scramble, AKA Beano, AKA The Crafty Cockney Band, who (under the CCB moniker) produced the single Arrows in 1979/80 which accompanied the John Samson-directed short film, also called Arrows, starring the Crafty Cockney himself Eric Bristow! Supposedly it supported The Long Good Friday on its original release.

[George White]

Song 1
Don't Throw Your Love Away by a poor man's Racey*.
Contains barely any words that aren't the title.
(*maybe it WAS Racey - they probably needed this gig by 1980)

Song 2
Happy Everything by Maggie Moon
Wogan says that she's 16 (probably a BBC catchphrase at the time), but you'd swear she was pushing 40.

Song 3
Easy by Plain Sailing
Pastel suit cunts.
Singer looks like an angry Bryan Ferry/Elton Welsby.

Song 4
Here We'll Stay by Sonia Jones
So blatantly miming that the worst thing about this is somehow not her atrocious 'holiday hair'.

Song 5
Love Enough For Two by Prima Donna
Possibly the wettest 3 minutes on record.
Still, Kate Robbins looked quite foxy back then.

Song 6
Symphony For You by Jacqui Scott
Another 16 year old dressed like your nan!
A ballad so dreary that even Celine Dion would tell it to fuck off.

Song 7
Love Is Alive by Duke & The Aces
Good God...
Clearly introduced by Wogan as "3 boys and 2 girls" despite there being 6 of them.

Song 8
Everything's Alright by Roy Winston
The definition of the phrase 'punchable face'.
Don't think he's played piano before.

Song 9
Love Comes Love Grows by Midnight
Imagine a shit version of Dollar that have been at an office-themed funeral.
Well, this is even shitter than that.

Song 10
Gonna Do My Best by The Main Event
(AKA Cheryl Baker: The Wilderness Years)
I think they're trying to be a less funky version of The Dooleys and, to be fair, they succeeded.

Song 11
I Want To Be Me - Pussyfoot
Shit, it's Toyah!
Oh, it's OK, it's just another woman doing that crazy eyes thing.

Song 12
Surrender by Kim Clark
This one is 19 years old, so obviously she looks like Joan Collins' drunk mum.
Apparently she was a late replacement for the New Seekers. All of 'em.

Winner: Johnny Logan

Sonia Jones, didn't she sing the Life of Brian theme... she was about 17 too.