Bog paper drenched and dripping in vibrant scarlet blood

[Cardenio I]

Just had to go for a second one which was yesterday's spicy meatballs. Not the order I wanted these fuckers coming out in.

[Replies From View]

Just had to go for a second one which was yesterday's spicy meatballs. Not the order I wanted these fuckers coming out in.

Linda McCartney vegetarian meatballs are notorious for exiting in the same order you ate them.  If that's the kind of thing you're after.

[touchingcloth]

Which one? If you say "My Favourite Things", you've got cloth-ears.

High on a hill was a ring-torn goatherd
Bog paper drenched and dri-ip-ping
Sore was the hoop of the ring-torn goatherd
In vibrant scarlet blood

[Blue Jam]

You managed to find some bog paper?

[Shaky]

Crikey, last night I had some red liquid dripping from my nose! Quite worried. Then in the morning some white gluey substance emanated from my private member - but that wasn't so bad.

Happened the other way round to me once. That was fine too.

[Replies From View]

Happened the other way round to me once. That was fine too.

Your body was hoovering up fluids? 


Where from?!

[touchingcloth]

Your body was hoovering up fluids? 


Where from?!

His private member ingested the fluids from his nose and his nose sucked up the fluids from his private member.

[Blue Jam]

On a gathering storm comes a tall handsome gent
In a dusty black coat with a RED REAR END

[Elderly Sumo Prophecy]

Red rain is coming down
Red rain
Red rain is pouring down
Pouring down all out of me

[touchingcloth]

As I look behind, I am filled with foreboding; like the Roman, I seem to see my arse foaming with much blood.

[Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse]

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, AND ALL THAT IS HOLY, MY ANUS etc.

[Glebe]

I have bad piles and have had a few arse bleeds over the years.

[Cerys]

The blood of the arse will commit fault at London.

[ZoyzaSorris]

I have bad piles and have had a few arse bleeds over the years.

I have just got off of a Zoom with my friend and he thanks you for your solidarity. He says that he has grown a few modest bunches of rectal cabernet in his time but has never had vibrant scarlet blood gushing out of his anus before, but now he knows it is the good blood and not the bad blood he will treat it with the dismissiveness it deserves.

[Johnny Yesno]

I've never seen blood look so pinkish as after a shite. I've never seen it shine so bright [in the night].

Berger. Ber-er-erger.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eOmBfObwjko

George Melly singing on that, apparently.

[Johnny Yesno]

I have just got off of a Zoom with my friend and he thanks you for your solidarity.

I've never heard anyone call it a Zoom before, but more chalfont solidarity here.

[canadagoose]

If it's any consolation I'm also having an outbreak of the old

Spoiler alert

blood-shitting again. As before, it was accompanied by some hellish pain and nausea (and vomiting) a few hours prior to the first incident.

[close]

What could it be? I had that colonoscopy and apart from polyps and me having a redundant colon, they didn't see anything. Can't be fucked with it, tbh.

[Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse]

E.coli?

[Cloud]

Bit different with symptoms. Get checked out by a GP
Hopefully nothing but better safe than sorry

[samadriel]

A redundant colon?

[ZoyzaSorris]

Should have taken advantage of the government colon retention scheme, I have had mine furloughed.

[Sebastian Cobb]

A redundant colon?

I've furloughed mine.

[ZoyzaSorris]

They've all got furloughed colons by the time I've finished with them (etc)