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The Brand New All Encompassing Movie Musical Thread

Started by Small Man Big Horse, April 05, 2020, 12:25:07 AM

Previous topic - Next topic

Small Man Big Horse

Darling Lili (1970) - This really is an odd World War One set film, as Lili (Julie Andrews) is a popular English stage singer but also an undercover German spy who we're supposed to like, despite the fact that she uses her breasts and vagina to get British officers to reveal their secrets. She also often acts like a spoilt brat and is rather irritating in general, and gets the major arse on when after falling for her latest target, Major William Larrabee (Rock Hudson),
Spoiler alert
she discovers he might be also dating a stripper and puts all of their lives in danger
[close]
. It's one of those musicals where the songs are only performed with a band and a stage and so of the variety I'm not that huge a fan of, and the songs aren't that special annoyingly either with only a couple appealing. There are some positives, at times the story is an unusual one, the aerial sequences are decent, and Rock Hudson is good value for money (even though I've no idea why he likes that self absorbed cunt Lili), but it goes on for an age, with the ending dragging, and
Spoiler alert
disappointing too as Lili didn't die or wasn't imprisoned for life and somewhat ridiculously she gets her man in the end
[close]
. 5.1/10

Ignatius_S

Quote from: Small Man Big Horse on June 10, 2020, 01:57:23 PM
I've not seen the film version but I did see it on stage last year, as it was produced by Sedos who are technically an amateur group but they have their own theatre and a lot of funding, and it was really impressive, a musical I had a huge amount of time for and the two and a half hours flew by, so I definitely do plan to seek out the film version sooner rather than later.

That's really interesting to hear, I think I'd definitely have liked it a hell of a lot more if there had featured all the songs in it, especially as it sounds like they mostly flesh out the characters I had issues with.

I'm quite jealous of the two of you seeing that! Think that's a good idea about waiting a little longer to watch the film - as mentioned they do revise it for the screen, but feel it's a great transfer.

re: Forum - I'm inclined to your view; as I say I'm fond of the film but it's not perfect!

Although I'm inclined to see Domina in a slightly different light, I'm not sure if the stage version would salve all your issues with those characters.

As I say, I feel that Forum does reflect the influences of the Roman farces in the portrayal of those female characters, but it's worth a mention that the older work is arguably more nuanced than many would expect - e.g. I've seen it argued that Plautus did comment about how females were objectified in Roman society.

Forum was based on the play, Pseudolus - which I think you'll recognise the set-up!

QuoteOnce the play starts Calidorus and Pseudolus enter the stage, Calidorus is visibly upset. After Pseudolus pushes his master's son to tell him what is wrong, Calidorus shows him a letter he received. Pseudolus first mocks the poor handwriting it is written in then reads the letter, which says that Calidorus' lover Phoenicium, a prostitute, has been sold and the man who is supposed to come with the last of the money to pay for her and pick her up for her new master is coming very soon. Calidorus obviously wants to save her but he has no money of his own and his father won't lend him any to help save her. He turns to Pseudolus, who is his father's chief slave, for help. Pseudolus doesn't have the money they require to buy her, but thinks he can improvise a plan to get it and to save Phoenicium.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pseudolus

Ignatius_S

Quote from: Small Man Big Horse on June 13, 2020, 10:49:33 PM
Hello, Dolly! (1969) - Barbra Steisand's Dolly can fix anything for anyone, except that the man she wants to seduce, Horace Vandergelder (Walter Matthau), is interested in someone else. Meanwhile Vandergelder's niece wants to marry an artist but Vandergelder ain't having any of that, and his employee (Michael Crawford, showing off the flare for physical comedy he'd become famous for in a couple of years time) is twenty eight and three quarters and downright annoyed that he's never snogged anyone, so he and Barnaby (Dunno, some bloke) are off to New York, with Dolly orchestrating the lives of everyone else for her own wicked means. Streisland's superb and all kinds of foxy but it's actually Crawford and his beau Irene Molloy (Marianne McAndrew) who are the MVP's as they have the dafter and more playful moments, and it's hard to understand why Dolly would be interested in Vandergelder given what a cunt he is,
Spoiler alert
and his sudden change of mind towards her doesn't add up either, Matthau apparently despised Streisand in real life and that definitely comes across here
[close]
. Otherwise this is lovely stuff though, as it's based on a Broadway musical from the mid sixties the songs aren't particularly inventive sound wise but the lyrics are strong and often very funny, and it's that rare beast, a musical with lots of dance numbers that I enjoyed with the one in the Harmonia Gardens restaurant being a particular delight. 8.0/10

Great you enjoyed it - that was one I was planning to post about!

Very nicely executed and it looks (and sounds) great - I'm particularly fond of the Harmonia Gardens bit, so feel validated!

Streisand was really too young for the role (Carol 'Raspberries' Channing played Dolly in the first version) but happy to overlook it. Danny Lockin, who played Barnaby, toured in the musical version and played with a variety of 'Dollies' and it was interesting to read his thoughts. I first saw it as a child and Lockin was probably the stand-out for me and wondered why he didn't appear in more - when I later read about him, it was all rather sad (his career rather stalled and died in very tragic, violent conditions).

All the cast as really good and I adore Matthau, so him in it is pure gravy for me. EJ Parker, who played Minnie, co-starred in the Robert Morse series I mentioned... and I think Morse performed in the play, The Matchmake, which Dolly is based on.

re: Streisand
Spoiler alert
- from what I've read, she greatly irritated everyone and kept putting her oar in to Kelly about how to shoot it; she's to a degree acknowledged that, saying because it was early in her career, she wanted it to be perfect and that's why she behaved the way she did. Matthau famously said to her, 'you have as much talent as one of my farts (or a gnat's fart, depending on the version)' when telling her to shut up and let Kelly direct.
[close]

I think it was in the Harry Thompson biography about Peter Cook that mentions they wanted to Stanley Donen to direct Dolly, but he opted to do Bedazzled instead - not sure if it was in that book, but I read his fee for Dolly would have been equivalent to the entire budget of Bedazzled.

The making of Hello Dolly doesn't sound very fun overall - e.g. when they shot the parade scene, it was so hot that extras were fainting from the heat due to the heavy costumes they had to wear.

Ignatius_S

Quote from: Small Man Big Horse on June 21, 2020, 08:13:11 PM
Darling Lili (1970) -

Not sure I've seen this one. I did want to see it, but will be tempering expectations![/quote]

Small Man Big Horse

Quote from: Ignatius_S on June 22, 2020, 06:12:06 PM
I'm quite jealous of the two of you seeing that! Think that's a good idea about waiting a little longer to watch the film - as mentioned they do revise it for the screen, but feel it's a great transfer.

It really was something a bit special, I've seen a couple of other things they've produced and it's been a mixed bag (and their version of Soho Cinders I struggled a fair bit with) but this was enormous fun, if they ever re-stage it I'll definitely let you know.

Quotere: Forum - I'm inclined to your view; as I say I'm fond of the film but it's not perfect!

Although I'm inclined to see Domina in a slightly different light, I'm not sure if the stage version would salve all your issues with those characters.

As I say, I feel that Forum does reflect the influences of the Roman farces in the portrayal of those female characters, but it's worth a mention that the older work is arguably more nuanced than many would expect - e.g. I've seen it argued that Plautus did comment about how females were objectified in Roman society.

Forum was based on the play, Pseudolus - which I think you'll recognise the set-up!

QuoteOnce the play starts Calidorus and Pseudolus enter the stage, Calidorus is visibly upset. After Pseudolus pushes his master's son to tell him what is wrong, Calidorus shows him a letter he received. Pseudolus first mocks the poor handwriting it is written in then reads the letter, which says that Calidorus' lover Phoenicium, a prostitute, has been sold and the man who is supposed to come with the last of the money to pay for her and pick her up for her new master is coming very soon. Calidorus obviously wants to save her but he has no money of his own and his father won't lend him any to help save her. He turns to Pseudolus, who is his father's chief slave, for help. Pseudolus doesn't have the money they require to buy her, but thinks he can improvise a plan to get it and to save Phoenicium.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pseudolus

I'd still definitely like to see the stage version, if only to hear the songs which were omitted from the film, and if it changes my view of it as a whole. And I had no idea it was based on such an ancient play, and just hope the playwright's descendants got royalties. ;)

Quote from: Ignatius_S on June 22, 2020, 06:32:53 PM
Great you enjoyed it - that was one I was planning to post about!

Very nicely executed and it looks (and sounds) great - I'm particularly fond of the Harmonia Gardens bit, so feel validated!

Streisand was really too young for the role (Carol 'Raspberries' Channing played Dolly in the first version) but happy to overlook it. Danny Lockin, who played Barnaby, toured in the musical version and played with a variety of 'Dollies' and it was interesting to read his thoughts. I first saw it as a child and Lockin was probably the stand-out for me and wondered why he didn't appear in more - when I later read about him, it was all rather sad (his career rather stalled and died in very tragic, violent conditions).

You're right about Streisand being too young, given that she's supposed to have been widowed a fair while back and had such a reputation in the city it doesn't make sense that she's so young, but her voice is so alluring in it I can't complain.

QuoteAll the cast as really good and I adore Matthau, so him in it is pure gravy for me. EJ Parker, who played Minnie, co-starred in the Robert Morse series I mentioned... and I think Morse performed in the play, The Matchmake, which Dolly is based on.

re: Streisand
Spoiler alert
- from what I've read, she greatly irritated everyone and kept putting her oar in to Kelly about how to shoot it; she's to a degree acknowledged that, saying because it was early in her career, she wanted it to be perfect and that's why she behaved the way she did. Matthau famously said to her, 'you have as much talent as one of my farts (or a gnat's fart, depending on the version)' when telling her to shut up and let Kelly direct.
[close]

I think it was in the Harry Thompson biography about Peter Cook that mentions they wanted to Stanley Donen to direct Dolly, but he opted to do Bedazzled instead - not sure if it was in that book, but I read his fee for Dolly would have been equivalent to the entire budget of Bedazzled.

The making of Hello Dolly doesn't sound very fun overall - e.g. when they shot the parade scene, it was so hot that extras were fainting from the heat due to the heavy costumes they had to wear.

Matthau is definitely fun, his grumpiness fits the role perfectly even if it's a shame he couldn't summon up the ability to pretend to like Streisand at any point in the film! That's interesting to hear about the making of the film in general though, I'm just looking at a couple of articles about it now and it does seem rather unpleasant, but hey, at least it was worth it in the long run. And I'm also glad that Julie Andrews or Elizabeth Taylor weren't cast in the lead role either, Streisand may not have been perfect but I can't imagine either working.

Quote from: Ignatius_S on June 22, 2020, 06:34:32 PM
Not sure I've seen this one. I did want to see it, but will be tempering expectations!

Perhaps if I'd known it wasn't a proper musical I might not have been so disappointed, but even then Andrews character is so annoying I doubt I'd have loved it, I like Andrews a lot elsewhere (Thoroughly Modern Millie especially) but here she's a selfish so and so and just someone I didn't care for at all, which is problematic when you're supposed to root for her.

Small Man Big Horse

Rockula (1990) - Ralph (Dean Cameron) and his mom Phoebe (Tony Basil) are vampires, and slightly rubbish ones at that, in this truly bizarre film that contains a complicated plot concerning a romance between Ralph and Mona (Tawny Fere) which takes place every 22 years, but each time a pirate comes along and fucks things up, only for Mona to be then reincarnated. This time vampire Ralph is determined to save her, though the extremely camp video director and "Death Park" owner Stanley (Thomas Dolby) has other plans, and will Mona want to fuck a vampire, anyhow? It's one of those musicals where the majority of the songs are performed on stage with a band present annoyingly, but a couple aren't at least, and nearly all of them are dumb but fun pop numbers with insanely idiotic but quite funny lyrics, and as this is a film the lead character gets hit by a car but carries on singing a song it's impossible to dislike, even if this is a weird, cheesy and often plan ridiculous movie. 6.4/10

Small Man Big Horse

Goodbye Mr Chips (1969) - Peter O'Toole's a stick in the mud teacher in 1920's England who meets actress Ms Katherine Bridges (Petula Clark) while on holiday in Pompeii, and upon returning to England the two fall for each other. But can the loud and sweary Katherine fit in to life at the uptight school Mr Chipping works at? Or will she start  sucking off all the students? She's certainly a hit with the boys so even though such scenes were not included in the film I bet she was, the dirty old bollocks.
Spoiler alert
There's a time jump of about 15 years two thirds of the way through the film so that it can deal with the second world war and take a darker turn,
[close]
though that makes it feel like a slightly oddly paced work, and I can't say many of the songs did it for me (though two featuring the students are really fun) but the film as a whole is an extremely charming work. Clark's certainly pretty great, her actress friend Ursula (Siân Phillips) is even better, and O'Toole's uptight school master is an endearing creation and one who made me want to be a proper teacher myself until I remembered what cunts children are today. 8.1/10

Small Man Big Horse

Office (2015) - A co-production between Hong Kong and China, this is a visually impressive musical dramedy about the collapse of the financial markets in America and the effect that has on a company in an unnamed Asian city. Which might not sound like the stuff of hilarity but the first two thirds are a light hearted affair about status, ambition, and identity, along with hints of romance between the two leads, and the songs are really enjoyable, mostly short but definitely sweet and very funny pieces with memorable lyrics, a drinking song about ambition and an ode to hometown life being my favourites. When it takes a more serious turn in the final third it definitely becomes a lesser work, and the ending feels a bit rushed, but the first eighty minutes are so strong it's still a must see for musical fans. 7.4/10

Small Man Big Horse

Shock Treatment (1981) - Sort of sequel to The Rocky Horror Show where Brad and Janet are in the audience for what looks like a wholesome small town tv show, but naturally it's more disturbing than it initially appears and soon Brad
Spoiler alert
is carted off to a mental hospital and spends most of the film drugged up and tied up, and Janet's made in to a huge star, one who increasingly has no time for poor old Brad
[close]
. A fair few of the original cast are back albeit in different roles, and newcomers Barry Humphries, Ruby Wax and Rik Mayall are along for the ride, but it's a slightly flimsy affair, there's some satire of the media, fame, the mental health industry, consumerism and masculinity, but it feels a little mild, and though the songs are often fun (Shock Treatment, Lullaby and Bitchin' In The Kitchen being the ones I found most memorable) there's nothing even close to the songs found in O'Brien's much loved first musical. Indeed if you compare it to that it comes off wanting in the extreme, but if you pretend Rocky doesn't exist it fares better, though
Spoiler alert
a fairly limp ending is frustrating
[close]
and means it's unlikely I'll ever revisit it. 6.3/10

Small Man Big Horse

Brigadoon (1954) - Shamefully I'd only previously seen two of Vincente Minnelli's musicals (On a Clear Day You Can See Forever and Meet Me In St. Louis) even though he's considered one of the best directors of the genre and I'm very fond of the films I have seen of his. It's an unusual creation however, as two Americans (Gene Kelly and Van Johnson) are lost in the highlands of Scotland and then discover the rather small town of Brigadoon where thanks to some mad fucker
Spoiler alert
the residents of the town only live one day per century and the rest of the time the place mysteriously disappears
[close]
. Quite a few of the women throw themselves at our American fellas as there's a distinct lack of single men in the town, much to Van Johnson's horror and Kelly's delight, and so romantic hijinks ensue, but though the songs are mostly charming and it's often quite funny, there's a little too much dancing and not quite enough singing for my own personal liking. 7.2/10

EOLAN

Newsies (1992)

Christian Bale launching vehicle Disney live-action musical. Effectively an Americanised version of Oliver!; based off a true-story about young Newspaper sellers in New York going on strike against the magnate Joseph Pulitzer.
To be honest; I couldn't get through the first 20 minutes. Couldn't make out even the chorus of the early songs be sung or the reason the nuns were hanging around. Blatantly inferior to Oliver!, some reasonable dance scenes but I had to drop out.
Did check out the first half-hour of the stage-musical remake and that seemed far superior; better quality of delivery on the songs, funner staging and clearer narrative.

For the original Disney Film: 2.0 out of 10.

Small Man Big Horse

Quote from: EOLAN on July 13, 2020, 10:55:08 AM
Newsies (1992)

Christian Bale launching vehicle Disney live-action musical. Effectively an Americanised version of Oliver!; based off a true-story about young Newspaper sellers in New York going on strike against the magnate Joseph Pulitzer.
To be honest; I couldn't get through the first 20 minutes. Couldn't make out even the chorus of the early songs be sung or the reason the nuns were hanging around. Blatantly inferior to Oliver!, some reasonable dance scenes but I had to drop out.
Did check out the first half-hour of the stage-musical remake and that seemed far superior; better quality of delivery on the songs, funner staging and clearer narrative.

For the original Disney Film: 2.0 out of 10.

I've not seen the Disney version but I did watch the stage version about a month ago and quite enjoyed it, it's nothing that special, and I didn't download the soundtrack afterwards which suggests the songs aren't all that, but it passed the time well enough.

Voyage Of The Rock Aliens (1984) - Pia Zadora and Craig Sheffer star in this very eighties sci-fi comedy musical where a bunch of aliens in a guitar shaped spaceship are supposedly on a scientific mission but after having heard rock music they're desperate to find out which planet it came from, and that leads them to visiting Earth and the small town of "Speelburgh" where they get up to all manner of silly hijinks. This is about as daft as comedy got in the eighties but it's mostly very likeable stuff, a lot of the songs are short bursts of enjoyable ridiculousness and a couple of them are even quite catchy, but it loses a couple of points due to having a very disjointed and sightly disappointing ending. 6.8/10

Small Man Big Horse

Gigi (1958) - A Paris based musical which contains Maurice Chevalier singing the song "Thank Heaven For Little Girls" so fucking hell, it should be #cancelled straight away, and the rest of it's pretty fucking dodgy too as Gigi's a 15 year old (played thankfully by the 26 year old Leslie Caron) who is seduced by a family friend much much older than her, so yeah, this is never going to be restaged now without some serious revisions going on. It's a shame she's so young as otherwise it's enjoyable material, a sort of Dr Doolittle type affair where Gigi is being taught how to be a young lady by her grandmother but Gaston Lachaille (Louis Jourdan) comes along and falls in love with her. It has a surprisingly weird sense of humour at times too as Gaston celebrates the suicide attempt of a woman he broke up with after she cheated on him, and his Uncle Honoré (Maurice Chevalier) is a slutty motherfucker in general, but the songs that are jaunty and extremely fun, bar the couple which are jaunty and creepy. If you can pretend that Gigi's about 22 this could have been a classic, though the
Spoiler alert
rushed and slightly messy ending does lose it a couple of points
[close]
and it's a shame
Spoiler alert
the finale isn't expanded upon slightly as Gaston's sudden change of mind doesn't make much
[close]
sense. 7.6/10

Small Man Big Horse

The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993) - Poor old Jack has lost his passion for terrifying others at Halloween, but after discovering the existence of Christmas he plans to hijack it and bring joy to the world. Of course it all goes wrong and a very disturbing time is had by all, as predicted by the very horny Sally who is desperate to jump Jack's bones. Ahem. Sorry, couldn't resist, etc. It's beautifully designed, looks amazing in general, has a fun script and the songs are likeable, but only a couple fall in to the "Hey, I want to listen to that when not watching the movie" category. 7.5/10

Small Man Big Horse

The Last Five Years (2014) - Which begins with Anna Kendrick lamenting a failed relationship, before we jump back and witness a selection of vignettes from their five years together. It's song after song after song after that and the majority of them are great as it follows the relationship between Kenrdick's struggling actress and Jeremy Jordan's successful writer, Kendrick's quickly becoming an actress I'm shockingly fond of after this, Dummy and that Chris Morris film she was in, while Jordan (also very strong in the pro-shot version of Newsies) is very good too. Musically there's not a huge amount of variation, and perhaps it's one for musical fans only, but hey, that's me, and so I rate it 7.7/10

Small Man Big Horse

The Great Muppet Caper (1981) - Identical twins Kermit and Fozzie are investigative reporters who head over to the UK to chat to Diana Rigg as she's had her diamond jewels stolen. It's lovely stuff in general, there's lots of great fourth wall breaking jokes, John Cleese has a fun cameo as a very mild mannered fella, Miss Piggy's water ballet sequence is amazing, and the songs are cute in general, there's nothing that amazing but all are likeable. Plus at the end
Spoiler alert
in the big fight I'm pretty sure that Piggy punches two of the women in the vagina
[close]
, and Charles Grodin is so convincing that I'm certain he genuinely wants to fuck a pig, and what more could you want from a movie than that? 7.7/10

Small Man Big Horse

Waitress (2019) - A pro-shot version of the musical based on Adrienne Shelly's indie comedy drama, where in a small pie obsessed diner three waitresses deal with the craziness life and love throws up at them. So Jenna's struggling because she's pregnant by her cunt of a husband yet in lust with her Doctor, Becky's in a sex-less marriage but fucking the diner's cook, and Dawn's single but semi-stalked by a weirdo - Can any of them find happiness? Yes, yes they can, this is a feel good musical after all, where the songs are often very catchy with fun lyrics, though the second half is lacking a killer track, one which will have you falling madly in love with the piece, which is a shame as those in the first are definitely more memorable. Still, the characters are appealing, and the script is a smart one, and the mostly happy ending manages to avoid cliche and offers up hope for our motley crue, even if one part,
Spoiler alert
Becky and her affair with Cal
[close]
, is forgotten about a bit. 7.4/10.

RicoMNKN

I'll second Tokyo Tribe.  Some of the sexism is a bit dodgy, but otherwise I found it to be an odd mix of The Warriors (plot) and Speed Racer (cartoon intensity).  Never a dull moment.  Made me think of John Waters in places humour-wise, which I'm not complaining about.

And I'll add It Couldn't Happen Here, the Pet Shop Boys' movie.   Watched the remastered version recently, and it's an absolute mess, but incredibly charming and British (in a Viz / Carry On way).  I also like the songs a lot, which obviously helps.

Small Man Big Horse

Quote from: RicoMNKN on August 16, 2020, 11:28:20 PM
I'll second Tokyo Tribe.  Some of the sexism is a bit dodgy, but otherwise I found it to be an odd mix of The Warriors (plot) and Speed Racer (cartoon intensity).  Never a dull moment.  Made me think of John Waters in places humour-wise, which I'm not complaining about.

And I'll add It Couldn't Happen Here, the Pet Shop Boys' movie.   Watched the remastered version recently, and it's an absolute mess, but incredibly charming and British (in a Viz / Carry On way).  I also like the songs a lot, which obviously helps.

I know I've seen It Couldn't Happen Here but remember very little about it. I'm a big fan of the Pet Shop Boys though, and have tracked it down (though sadly not the remastered version) so I'll definitely watch it again soon.

Ruthless The Musical (2018) - Another pro-shot musical, this one's about the perils of stardom as a very young actress is prepared to do anything to attain fame, and soon her mother becomes obsessed with stardom too. It's a strange mix, the first half is very funny, there's lots of mockery and commentary of the genre (one song is from the perspective of a critic who sings about how much she hates musicals which amuses greatly), and the kid's a great comedic actress even if her singing voice occasionally grates. But the second half descends in to silliness, some of the fourth wall breaking is far too on the nose, and the ending is weak and then some. Also, while fine none of the songs are that great, and it's definitely not a soundtrack I have any urge to own. 6.4/10

The Muppets Take Manhattan (1984) - After graduating college the Muppets head off to Broadway to stage the musical Kermit has written, but they fail and every one goes their separate ways, singing the all kinds of lovely "Saying Goodbye" as they depart. Well everyone apart from Piggy who jealously spies on Kermit and his new friend Jenny, but once the duo are reunited it looks like fame and fortune may come there way, until Kermit's hit by a car and suffers from amnesia. It sometimes feels like a collection of sketches rather than having the strongest of narratives, and as with the two earlier movies there's not quite enough songs, but it's a charming and lovely film in general. 7.7/10

Small Man Big Horse

#49
The Little Mermaid (1989) - Famous Disney effort from 1989 which saw Howard Ashman and Alan Menken come along and help make their animated fare full of charm, lovable characters and amazing songs again. A fish out of water affair (ahem, sorry) it sees horny teenager Ariel leave the sea behind to try and fuck handsome Prince Eric, but there's a problem as she has to give away her voice to the Sea Witch Ursula in exchange for legs and a vagina.
Spoiler alert
Luckily her for Eric prefers the strong, silent type, and though there's one plot twist along the way in the end they engage in sexual intercourse. It's a rare occasion where a film could have benefited by being a little longer (a couple more scenes of Eric and Ariel courting and at least two more songs would have been nice, especially one at the end between the happy couple)
[close]
but otherwise it's extremely endearing material. 7.8/10

Small Man Big Horse

Beauty And The Beast (1991) - Disney classic where nearly all the men are horrible cunts, the beast especially who after imprisoning Belle's father ends up agreeing to free him if she takes his place for the rest of eternity. Luckily for her Stockholm syndrome kicks in and she starts wanting to give him a blow job, and a happy ending ensues for all (except women). Fine, fine, Belle changing her mind and growing fond of him is understandable I suppose, but as with The Little Mermaid seeing more of their courtship would have made the film stronger (even if it were just an extra five minutes) but otherwise this is lovely and charming and deserving of it's reputation. 8.0/10

Small Man Big Horse

Aladdin (1992) - The third of Howard Ashman's Disney movies, though he sadly died during its production so Tim Rice was brought in to contribute a couple of the songs (including the very cheesy A Whole New World). Best known for Robin Williams' highly praised performance, it's a lot more cartoony than Beast or Mermaid, even before the genie turns up on the scene what with the way Aladdin and Jafar have animal sidekicks and there's a fair amount of impossible slapstick. Williams isn't that great either, I like him a lot elsewhere but here he's often quite exhausting, some of his impersonations and pop culture references date the movie and aren't that funny. The film also needs about two more big numbers for it to be a classic, and it's yet another romance where the central couple marry after spending about thirty minutes in each other's company. Still, despite these issues it is fun, but for me it's easily the weakest of the three Ashman was involved with. 7.0/10

Small Man Big Horse

Peau d'Ane aka Donkey Skin (1970) - A musical by Jacques Demy based on an old fairy tale where when the Queen dies she makes her husband the King (Jean Marais) swear he will only remarry when he finds someone more beautiful than she was - which he fails to do, until he notices how hot his daughter (Catherine Deneuve) is. Oh those wacky French types, and worryingly the daughter is considering it until she's talked out of the idea by her fairy godmother, who suggests she makes a series of supposedly impossible requests that the King unfortunately manages to grant, so she runs off and lives as a scullery maid in some far away locale. It's a strange situation where the first half only has a couple of songs, but the second is packed with them, and is all the better for it as they're wry and mostly very funny. Much of the imagery is quite beautiful and / or fucking weird, and it's a film that is extremely memorable, albeit one slightly lacking in substance, and if the first half had as many songs as the second did I might even rate it as a bit of a classic. But it doesn't, so I don't. 7.4/10

Small Man Big Horse

Passing Strange (2009) - Spike Lee filmed version of the Broadway stage show, it's a biographical tale all about a kid (known only as Youth) who struggles with life in LA and so heads to Europe, (or Amsterdam and Berlin at least) and learns more about himself and the world and the very different kinds of culture, people and kinds of families that exist. It's a smart, funny affair, almost constantly sung piece with very little spoken dialogue, and though initially the music / songs sound similar it becomes more and more diverse as Youth meets different individuals. And it's great. Really fucking great, and even though the ending didn't quite work for me it's a very minor issue in what's a really fantastic musical. 7.9/10

Small Man Big Horse

Everyone Says I Love You (1996) - Jukebox musical with a bunch of songs from classic movies mostly from the 30's, it's a mix of Edward Norton and Drew Barrymore's flailing relationship and Woody Allen trying to fuck Julia Roberts. The latter is helped out by his daughter Natasha Lyonne having spied on Roberts' therapist sessions and so she's able to provide him with in-depth secrets, and it's a little creepy to see Allen take advantage of this. Ignoring Woody's plotline it's rather charming, Alan Alda is great, Tim Roth's amusing as a criminal felon type, the ghosts version of "It's later than you think" is fantastic, and Natasha Lyonne's precocious narrator is really amusing, but it's also fairly flimsy as a whole, and a shame Allen's plotline takes up such a big chunk of the movie. 6.5/10

Small Man Big Horse

Sunshine On Leith (2013) - A jukebox musical featuring songs from The Proclaimers, where two soldiers, Davy and Ally, return home and romantic hijinks ensue, while there's a slight slice of family drama too as Davy's dad (Peter Mullen) cheated on his wife 25 years ago. It's a largely sweet, warm and lovely affair, simplistic perhaps but that's not to it's detriment and it's impressively directed by Dexter Fletcher, and when it gets to that song it's a joyous moment indeed. 7.9/10.

Legally Blonde The Musical (2007) - A proshot musical that aired on MTV, it's a mix of pop and soft rock as Elle gets in to Harvard to win back her boyfriend but then realises he's a cunt. The songs are fun but a bit nothing-y, the book is amusing but not that special, and it's a musical that's likeable but only that. 6.5/10

Small Man Big Horse

The Best Little Whorehouse In Texas (1982) - Miss Mona (Dolly Parton) runs a brothel and dates the sheriff (Burt Reynolds) but when a tv journalist runs an expose on her it causes havoc for pretty much everyone in town. The songs are cute (though sadly Reynolds only sings once), the performances great, and if you ignore the problematic content where they're all happy hookers and there's definitely, absolutely no downside whatsoever to prostitution at the old Chicken Ranch, this is a very engaging, funny and likeable work indeed. 7.7/10

Small Man Big Horse

Grease (1978) - Danny and Sandy had a summer romance but when they meet again when she starts at his school he acts like a dick in this little known film that hardly anyone's ever heard of. Olivia Newton John's a bit weak, Sonny is annoying and there's a bit of filler in the first half, but the majority of the time it lives up to its classic status, the songs are nearly all strong, the dance off in the high school gym is enormously infectious fun and it ends in a delightful fashion. 7.8/10.

Grease 2 (1982) - We're back at Rydell High, with Frenchy, Principal McGee, Blanche and a couple of other members of the original cast, but mainly this is a bunch of new students including Michelle Pfeiffer and English transfer student Maxwell Caulfield, with the latter falling for the former but she's only interested in the T-birds who ride motorbikes. It's kind of a reverse of the first film with the clean cut guy falling for the bad girl, though when he buys a bike, goggles and a helmet she doesn't recognise him, despite his English accent and his English face. Also starring a young Pamela Adlon (though she's not in it enough) and Christopher MacDonald (who's Grease 2's Sonny equivalent and in it too much), this contains a dumb plot but quite a few fun songs, including some amusing ones about bowling, Pfeiffer's lust for a cool rider, pollination (which is a sex song that's genuinely funny), Who's That Guy (which features some great ensemble silliness), and the slightly creepy Do It For Our Country, where Louis tries to persuade girlfriend Sharon that a nuclear bomb has exploded and so they should have sex, but thankfully it doesn't work. Though it doesn't contain anything quite as catchy as Grease Lightning or Summer Loving and the ending's a bit disjoined it doesn't deserve it's poor reputation, and this is a daft, enjoyable slice of nonsense. 7.1/10

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Stilyagi (2008) aka Hipsters, this Russian musical is a visually impressive beast, as Mels (young Conan O'Brien lookalike Anton Shagin) meets Polza (young Carey Mulligan lookalike Oksana Akinshina) and is so blown away by her that he starts dressing like a hipster / dandy, learns the saxophone and hangs out with a new crowd. But this is Russia in 1955 and not everyone approves of these crazy kids,
Spoiler alert
and real life crashes home towards the end, though just when it looks like the ending will disappoint it pulls off a fantastic finale which celebrates those with a passion for music
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. Narrative-wise it's a little simplistic, but it's a sumptuous, seductive affair and if you're a fan of musicals you'll most likely be won over by it. 7.7/10

Small Man Big Horse

Best Summer Ever (2020) - A bunch of kids have had the best summer ever but now it's over will the love story between Sage and Tony survive, and will he be able to come clean and admit that he doesn't want to be a football player and secretly loves dancing and singing? A bright, smart, fun comedy, it's usp is that about half of the cast have disabilities but it never references this and just plays out as a fun, upbeat rom-com. The songs are sometimes a bit cheesy but they're also often pretty funny, and while it might not be the most original story it has a knowing sense of humour and plenty of charm, and if you like musicals and hate this it's because you despise disabled people you monstrous cunt you. 7.5/10