Captain Tom Moore

[Captain Z]

There, how do you like that? Hehe, can't get mad, I'm the Queen!

[idunnosomename]

Unfortunately she had already bestowed immortality upon him so he will not die of his injury or indeed ever. All hail Sir Tom

[imitationleather]

He'll be raping our descendants long after we are all dead.

[Ferris]

Tragedy strikes as the CoD accidentally stabs are brave Sir Major Colonel Captain Tom right through the fucking bonce.

The slowest draw in the west.

[Old Gold Tooth]

"How appropriate, you fight like a cow."

[Pearly-Dewdrops Drops]

Please edit this thread title, it is now DISRESPECTFUL.

[Clatty McCutcheon]

Tragedy strikes as the CoD accidentally stabs are brave Sir Major Colonel Captain Tom right through the fucking bonce.

I've sometimes wondered if she ever has a sort of 'Liz's Mad Thought' when doing that sword thing - it must fleetingly pass through her mind that she could just behead some fucker with impunity. She could just give the grieving family a golden swan or something as compensation, and they'd just have to suck it up.

[Better Midlands]

That's where he's been for the last few months

Yeah, they've been fucking for a while.

[BlodwynPig]

I've sometimes wondered if she ever has a sort of 'Liz's Mad Thought' when doing that sword thing - it must fleetingly pass through her mind that she could just behead some fucker with impunity. She could just give the grieving family a golden swan or something as compensation, and they'd just have to suck it up.

Unless a political revolution ensued, she'd get away with it

https://www.legalcheek.com/lc-journal-posts/what-would-happen-if-the-queen-went-on-a-crime-spree/

[idunnosomename]

how many orifices has sir tom destroyed with his pork sword

[Butchers Blind]

What sort of cunt brings a zimmer frame to a sword fight?

[Dewt]

I remember when I was at primary school and I was just TOO COLD to play football during PE and our schoolmasterly teacher grabbed me by the arms and started running with me to keep me warm, at his full grown man's pace that meant I had to repeatedly jump in the air to keep from being dragged along the ground

Anyway imagine if he did that to Captain Tom Moore

[machotrouts]

SoulCalibur's let itself go

[A Car With No Doors]

You lot are all monsters. I think it's tragic Ron Mael has been reduced to such a state.

[Al Tha Funkee Homosapien]

[steve98]

That's interesting. A 2-headed dildo and a small dog (that looks familiar from these parts.) What can it mean?

[EDIT to add] And is Tom fellating the dildo for a second?

[Icehaven]

Oh to be old again.

[idunnosomename]

somehow this no sillier than what actually happened

[El Unicornio, mang]

[bgmnts]

Mooretal Tombat.

[idunnosomename]

Is this cunt still doing fucking laps or is he done with that now

[Hand Solo]

HOLY FUCK I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS FUCKING OLD CUNT, FUCK OFF

Phil Minton to do the soundtrack?

[BlodwynPig]

Oscar for Tom Moore.

President Tom Moore.

Galaxian Overlord Tom Moore.

Hive Mind Tom Moore.

[Butchers Blind]

I'll wait for the Legal Porno version.

[GMTV]

Call me Captain

[idunnosomename]

the first 45 minute of the movie is all rape

[Butchers Blind]

Lars von Trier to direct.

[Hand Solo]

"Look at me: I am de-Captain now."*

_{*Decapitating raped brown children.}

[Bleeding Kansas]

He says that he will never die. He walks in light and in shadow and he is a great favorite. He never sleeps. He is walking, walking. He says that he will never die.

[Hand Solo]

What's going to be the big pivotal scene of the movie? Fucking Clint Eastwood gurning earnestly with a bead of sweat running down his face ambling across a drive on a walker with great big bombastic music playing and Spitfires flying over? FUCK