Topic: Junk food consumed in quarantine

[Blue Jam]

Does "AS THEY SHOULD BE" translate as "HAIRY"?

Not a fan of pork scratchings myself *ducks*

[Angrew Lloyg Wegger]

Just seen marmite houmous in Tesco. What do you reckon, should I / shouldn't I?

[Captain Crunch]

Get that, the Marmite peanut butter and Marmite lynx, test all three and report back in the form of one of those unboxing videos.  Ma Mahmite HAUL check it out you guys.  Go on! 

[Angrew Lloyg Wegger]

Already had the marmite peanut butter and it is quite nice tbf. No way am I inflicting that hellish lynx combo on both me and my partner though

[Captain Crunch]

Yes it can be tough adapting to a new fragrance when you’re used to just dabbing a bit of Castrol behind your ear now and then. 

[FerriswheelBueller]

Just seen marmite houmous in Tesco. What do you reckon, should I / shouldn't I?

I’ve voluntarily made and consumed vegemite[1] and humous sandwiches on several occasions. They’re quite good. See also: vegemite and avocado toast.

1.	near-infinitely superior to marmite

[imitationleather]

I tried some of the Marmite Lynx shower gel. The most disconcerting thing about it is that it really looks like Marmite, and rubbing that brown liquid in to your skin feels very wrong.

[Bazooka]

I’ve voluntarily made and consumed vegemite[1] and humous sandwiches on several occasions. They’re quite good. See also: vegemite and avocado toast.

1.	near-infinitely superior to marmite

Avocado toast is not food, it's an ideological statement.

[FerriswheelBueller]

Marmite Lynx shower gel

What the fuck

[Blue Jam]

You think Marmite houmous sounds wrong? Over Christmas my local branch of Sainsbury's was selling chocolate houmous. I know a vegan might welcome a chocolate sauce containing no dairy products, but chocolate houmous? Why would anyone do that to themselves?

I actually shuddered a bit typing all that.

[Dex Sawash]

I bought a tub of desert humous at lidl (america) probably reported in this thread. Tub was half chocolate half snickerdoodle. I managed to get the snickerdoodle side in but the chocolate was too weird. Dipped it out with graham crackers. They've got some new ones now but forget what the flavo(u)rs are.

[Blue Jam]

I bought a tub of desert humous at lidl (america) probably reported in this thread. Tub was half chocolate half snickerdoodle. I managed to get the snickerdoodle side in but the chocolate was too weird. Dipped it out with graham crackers. They've got some new ones now but forget what the flavo(u)rs are.

Is there an app which translates wrong American foodstuffs into English?

;)

[Gurke and Hare]

I think graham crackers are digestives or a close equivalent, because that's what US cheesecake recipes use for the base. Snickerdoodle, fuck knows.

[seepage]

I always assumed graham crackers were like Garibaldi biscuits minus the squished flies.

[Blue Jam]

I know graham crackers are sweet and more like biscuits than what we Brits know as crackers, but for ages I wondered why Americans were usigg savoury ingredients in recipes for desserts.

Also... Golden Grahams? Cinnamon Grahams? Those aren't digestives. There should be a Standard Biscuit Naming Consortium or something.

[Blue Jam]

I always assumed graham crackers were like Garibaldi biscuits minus the squished flies.

I've always loved the name "Squashed Fly Biscuits". Also as someone who doesn't like dried vine fruits in most contexts those Marks and Sparks sultana butter biscuits are bloody lovely. Very calorific though so it's probably a good thing I've only eaten about four in my life, at times when people have brought them into the office etc.

Craving one now, grrrr.

[seepage]

There are a few in my current box of broken biscuits. Yum! Half the box is indestructible chocolate creams, so they could have missed out those and saved themselves a few bob. And they're horrible.

[Pearly-Dewdrops Drops]

How are there not graham crackers in the UK? I noticed this on the most recent Bake Off season when the contestants thought that a s'more was just marshmallow + any random biscuit/cookie. Low-energy failed empire.

Graham crackers have a unique texture and are honey flavoured. Sometimes they will do special flavours like chocolate or cinnamon, but the quintessential "graham cracker" flavour is honey. Not sure what the UK equivalent would be.

[Sebastian Cobb]

Sometimes I get tucs for a treat.

[Dex Sawash]

[thenoise]

Avocado toast is not food, it's an ideological statement.

I gave up my weekly avocado toast in order to save for a house. I've saved up £366.60 already. At this rate I should be able to cover the 10% deposit in about 76 years' time. Thanks for the tip, boomers!

[flotemysost]

^ haha

I've been going to an Asian grocery shop nearby for my roll call of not-very-adventurous stir fry ingredients (vermicelli rice noodles, Sriracha, Gochujang etc.) and it's a positively soothing experience compared to shopping in the big chain supermarkets. Organised distanced queue outside, firmly monitored customer limit, everyone wearing masks (and wearing them correctly).

(I know this isn't the supermarket thread, but hopefully it'll encourage me to try stuff I wouldn't normally have thought of/wouldn't have been able to find in a mainstream supermarket.)

There's also a significant Jewish community in my area and most of the big supermarkets have a kosher food shelf. I'm not Jewish but I've always liked that type of food, although I don't know very much about it. Bought some matzo the other day (the dry cracker type) which I've never tried before.

[bgmnts]

During one of my NYC I bought some matzo crackers and I found it impossible to make it close to edibile. I tried jam, chutney, peanut butter, cheese etc, nothing.

Kosher cardboard. IDF MDF.

[Pearly-Dewdrops Drops]

During one of my NYC I bought some matzo crackers and I found it impossible to make it close to edibile. I tried jam, chutney, peanut butter, cheese etc, nothing.

Kosher cardboard. IDF MDF.

This does the trick: https://www.thespruceeats.com/matzo-crack-4581250

[flotemysost]

IDF MDF.

Doesn't look good for carbin'.

This does the trick: https://www.thespruceeats.com/matzo-crack-4581250

Looks great, although I notice there's a recipe on the same website for "Christmas Crack". Is this actually some sort of multifaith dark web drug portal?

[Blue Jam]

I quite like matzos.

Been making regular trips to my local Jewish beigel shop over lockdown. Was glad to see it open and have been making an effort to support it since. Bagels/Beigels aren't junk food though. Might have to try their babka and pretend I'm in Seinfeld.

[stonkers]

Midland Snacks are the best commercially available, Mr Porky a distant second. I was unfortunate enough to grow up in the Black Country so you can take that as gospel.

Another vote for the Midland pork scratchings, though Mr Porky's Finest are also very good. I liked the Snaffling Pig Colman's mustard cracklings but haven't seen them in a while.

[seepage]

This does the trick: https://www.thespruceeats.com/matzo-crack-4581250

Or sell the remainder to Domino's - they use them for the base of their "thin-crust" pizzas.

[Captain Crunch]

Wetherspoons pizza (_pine) taste like matzo.