How many people are you talking to these days?

[weekender]

Hot sexy phone chat: Just the missus. But for a small fee I am prepared to consider offers from you lot.

£10 if you try and read the opening monologue to Blue Jam in a Yorkshire accent and post your attempt publicly.

Transcript here:

https://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/forums/index.php?topic=35291.0

[Jockice]

Met the elderly mother of one of my neighbours this lunchtime. She's spending her time between his flat and wherever his brother lives. She was on the way in while I was popping out to my car. And that's it for today.

[Small Man Big Horse]

£10 if you try and read the opening monologue to Blue Jam in a Yorkshire accent and post your attempt publicly.

Transcript here:

https://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/forums/index.php?topic=35291.0

Here you go: https://s3-ap-northeast-1.amazonaws.com/poodll-audioprocessing-out/CP/30/localhostuser/recordmp3online.com/poodll/poodllfile5eb18f595591c1.mp3 or you can download it and keep it forever with this link - https://www.mediafire.com/file/5xlxvdme1zc8q2v/Yorkshire_Jam.mp3/file

Admittedly it's a bit dodgy at first and occasionally sounds a bit Newcastle-ish, but I think after about twenty seconds it's mostly Yorkshire sounding.

Rather than accept the money myself I'd like it donated to this charity please: https://prostatecanceruk.org/get-involved/donate

[weekender]

Haha, fair play to you for doing that; your Yorkshire accent is abysmal!

I've made a £10 donation to the charity as requested.

[Small Man Big Horse]

Haha, fair play to you for doing that; your Yorkshire accent is abysmal!

I've made a £10 donation to the charity as requested.

But I listened to hours* of Alan Bennett before making it and he's from Yorkshire, and as it definitely sounds all but identical to him I declare my Yorkshire accent to be one of the best ever attempted. And thank you for the donation, hopefully because of it the both of us can take credit for curing prostate cancer.



*Seconds.

[peanutbutter]

A tramp harrassed me down the road for about 10 minutes yesterday. Only person I've talked to in about 4 days

[weekender]

A tramp harrassed me down the road for about 10 minutes yesterday. Only person I've talked to in about 4 days

Need more deetz fam

[Attila]

Same as usual -- none, if I can help it, outside of work situations and 'howdy do' when I pass people whilst out jogging.

But then, I'm an introverted misanthrope, so there you go.

[Attila]

IRL, zero (apart from the shop thing).  That's the way I like it baby.

Solidarity, loner pal.

Oh, I've been talking to the cats (and any cats and dogs I meet when I'm out and about. Get some strange looks from their owners when I say, 'Oh, hai, doggee,' but there you go.

[Jockice]

Tuesday: Nobody at all.
Yesterday: I managed to bump into three of my neighbours in a few minutes when I popped out to get some fresh air. Ian was gardening, Scott came down to pick up a parcel and Fiona was going out in her car. Also had an hour and a half on the phone with my girlfriend. I didn't say much.
Today:  Have a Zoom thing with other people from the place I do voluntary work. Such joy.

[peanutbutter]

Need more deetz fam

I tend to stop and chat for a bit for some reason I can't quite understand cos I'm a shit conversation, I don't have any money on me these days (seriously, where do I even get change right now?) and get really fucking pissed off when they suggest I go to a cash machine (does anyone ever do that?) so I stormed off at that point. With literally no one else on the usually busy street, he decided to follow me down the road shouting at me.

[Jockice]

Only my girlfriend yesterday. She was only on the phone for 40 minutes. Think she's gone off me?