Author Topic: Your shittest console  (Read 4211 times)

Your shittest console
« on: May 07, 2020, 05:47:06 PM »
Like, just the one that you got the least positives outta? Maybe instead of being annoyed by owning it you sometimes forget you bought it at all.

I've a few contenders, none of them are outright flops or anything though.

My worst is probably the Gameboy Color though, I got it for Pokemon and I eventually tracked down a copy of Pokemon Red (in late 1999, this is the kind of shithole I lived in) and eventually Gold too but beyond that I was totally at the mercy of the extremely limited stock of games in local stores. Pokemon was good, probably would've justified the purchase alone if I wasn't the only kid in the school playing it, but wasn't good enough to make up for how much it repeatedly disappointed me between months without a game, every non Pokemon game (all... 3 of them?) being a disappointment, and my dads weird refusal to allow a battery charger in the house meaning I was always rationing the fuck out of batteries.



Any Gizmondo console owners here? Probably at least one person who bought a 32X?

Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #1 on: May 07, 2020, 05:53:02 PM »
Real talk. The Wii U was fucking shit. I know it's rather fashionable to say that the Wii U is basically a better Switch or some disingenuous personality replacement tier bullshit.

Super Mario Maker is better than Super Mario Maker 2, and the Virtual Console is great, but everything else is aidsy boy. Every single port is way better on the Switch.

The Wii U was and is very shit.

Dewt

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Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #2 on: May 07, 2020, 05:55:33 PM »
I know it's rather fashionable to say that the Wii U is basically a better Switch
Nobody in the history of all time has ever even thought about maybe saying that

Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #3 on: May 07, 2020, 05:59:04 PM »
With all due respect, you don't know anything about anything.

LGR

Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #4 on: May 07, 2020, 06:00:25 PM »
Nobody in the history of all time has ever even thought about maybe saying that
I'll clutch my WiiU to my heart forever, but with Bayonetta 2 and the Wonderful 101 coming to Switch, along with basically all the exclusives that aren't easily attainable on PC or everywhere else - not that more than 2 or 3 games ever used the gamepad screen anyway - it's entirely obsolete.

Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #5 on: May 07, 2020, 06:03:01 PM »
It's the switch for me. I buy nintendo consoles solely for the first party titles and I haven't enjoyed anything on there this time round. It's sat next to the telly looking all dusty and sad.

Wii-u might not have been the best designed console, but Mario Kart 8, Mario 3D and Super Mario Bros U were all lovely.

Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #6 on: May 07, 2020, 06:09:47 PM »
I want to say N64, mainly because all I had was Pokemon Stadium, Body Harvest, Turok Rage Wars, and no friends.

Sebastian Cobb

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Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #7 on: May 07, 2020, 06:11:18 PM »
We had a CD-I.

The guy who does the Sunday quiz in the pub down the road still uses an Amiga CD32 plugged into a projector to do his bonus 'higher/lower' card round and the camel racing sweepstake.

Dewt

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Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #8 on: May 07, 2020, 06:12:59 PM »
With all due respect, you don't know anything about anything.

LGR
I guess if your social circle is largely 40 year old 2005 hipsters who now exclusively wear cargo shorts then you might hear the kind of thing you mentioned a lot

Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #9 on: May 07, 2020, 06:13:36 PM »
I like my Wii U a lot

Bought a broken one for like £60 over 2 years ago, fixed it for a fiver, hacked it, played BotW a bunch, had a fun evening playing Mario Kart 8 with a friend, hacked the virtual Wii, have it sitting in a drawer with two Wiimotes to be pulled out some time for a party or some shit.




Just bought two 3DS's, haven't used the first one I bought very much but I love the feel of it (New 3DS XL), I'm intending to gift these two away for some online play experiments but if they wind up lying around in my wardrobe for months they'll top this list, I guess.

I want to say N64, mainly because all I had was Pokemon Stadium, Body Harvest, Turok Rage Wars, and no friends.
Oh man yeah, I can totally see that being me if I got an N64, unwittingly buy a load of games that are primarily fun as multiplayer only to have no one to play with.
Whenever I hear Americans being all nostalgic about the N64, it always sounds like they benefitted hugely from loads of people owning them meaning 4 player multiplayer was happening all the time after school at one friends house or another

Dewt

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Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #10 on: May 07, 2020, 06:14:32 PM »
Barcode Battler

And original-hardware GBA. Just horrible to use. Full of SNES ports with the wrong-size screen. Much better when they made it a bit more usable and you could get a flash cart, but I didn't have that.

Sebastian Cobb

  • bad opinion haver
Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #11 on: May 07, 2020, 06:17:05 PM »
The only full colour game I had for my gameboy color was Lucky Luke. It was quite dull.

I don't know if it mattered at the time, but my original green screen gameboy fits my adult hands better and the buttons are much more sturdy. Plus the screen on my color needs the plastic replacing as I once put it in the same pocket as a fingerboard and the grip tape scuffed it up. 28 I was, etc.

Dewt

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Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #12 on: May 07, 2020, 06:18:27 PM »
Game Boy Pocket was a really, really good iteration of the Game Boy hardware.

I love the chunky beige originals though. That with a better screen would never need another revision.

Sebastian Cobb

  • bad opinion haver
Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #13 on: May 07, 2020, 06:19:42 PM »
I've got an original DS and that was ok but it too also had a comparatively flimsy D pad.

It looks like people do make backlit IPS screen replacements for the original gameboy.

Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #14 on: May 07, 2020, 06:20:54 PM »
I guess if your social circle is largely 40 year old 2005 hipsters who now exclusively wear cargo shorts then you might hear the kind of thing you mentioned a lot

Hahaha

It's the kind of thing people like you say to try to get my attention.


Dewt

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Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #15 on: May 07, 2020, 06:22:32 PM »
No thank you I do not want somebody to put their feet up on my desk so I get to hear unsolicited advice with a view of your legs and slip-ons

Sebastian Cobb

  • bad opinion haver
Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #16 on: May 07, 2020, 06:23:34 PM »
Fuck all wrong with cargo shorts if you've got the legs to pull them off tbh.

Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #17 on: May 07, 2020, 06:26:23 PM »
And original-hardware GBA. Just horrible to use. Full of SNES ports with the wrong-size screen. Much better when they made it a bit more usable and you could get a flash cart, but I didn't have that.
Yeah I routinely forget the original GBA existed. Probably a big part of why I fucking loved the SP so much, I forget about the first year and the catalogue of games got way more interesting from there on.

Can remember trying to play Circle of the Moon on my cousins one and it was just impossible to see anything on it.

I've got an original DS and that was ok but it too also had a comparatively flimsy D pad.
God yeah it looked like total shit too, didn't it? Like, at the time I remember being like "well... it looks better than it did at E3"


Kelvin

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Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #18 on: May 07, 2020, 06:26:42 PM »
Real talk. The Wii U was fucking shit. I know it's rather fashionable to say that the Wii U is basically a better Switch or some disingenuous personality replacement tier bullshit.

Super Mario Maker is better than Super Mario Maker 2, and the Virtual Console is great, but everything else is aidsy boy. Every single port is way better on the Switch.

The Wii U was and is very shit.

The Wii U is almost certainly their worst console as an overall package, but it's far from "Aids Tier", many of the Nintendo published games on it were extremely good, albeit sparsely released. It truly is the most irrelevant console I can think of, though; absolutely every essential game has either been ported, is due a port (3D World), or has been surpassed by a later entry. The one exceptions I can think of are Pikmin 3 and Xenoblade X, which will probably get a port (or sequel) before the end of the Switch's life cycle anyway.

No-one in the history of time and space has argued sincerely that the Wii U is better than the Switch, though. EDIT: Except the poster four posts after yours.

Sebastian Cobb

  • bad opinion haver
Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #19 on: May 07, 2020, 06:28:59 PM »
I thought the Wii U was generally considered to be underappreciated. Not helped by the fact nintendo seemed to be quite quiet about the launch.

'when's this new wii co...'
'... it's already out'
'oh right, i see'.

It probably didn't help that everyone rushed out to buy the wii and found it shit because the market was saturated with bad uses for the wiimote and crappy ports. There were some good games in there of course but I dunno if they appealed to the casual market who snapped a lot of them up.

Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #20 on: May 07, 2020, 06:29:51 PM »
I mean the GBA had awful lighting, but it's not shit in any other way.

Yeah probably the Wii U, I have no problem with its functionality other than the shit control pad battery life and it's obviously not the best control all round but you get used  to it.

I guess it's biggest embarrasssment is weak (that's being kind) 3rd party support, you take the Wii which had Disney Princess: My Fairytale Adventure, not on the Wii U is it?  Embarrassing.

Kelvin

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Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #21 on: May 07, 2020, 06:34:47 PM »
I thought the Wii U was generally considered to be underappreciated. Not helped by the fact nintendo seemed to be quite quiet about the launch.

'when's this new wii co...'
'... it's already out'
'oh right, i see'.

It probably didn't help that everyone rushed out to buy the wii and found it shit because the market was saturated with bad uses for the wiimote and crappy ports. There were some good games in there of course but I dunno if they appealed to the casual market who snapped a lot of them up.

It is underappreciated, imo. That's not the same as people thinking it's better than the Switch, which has almost all the same first party games, loads more on top, and a better design, as well. The Wii U had a terrible launch, with forgettable gimmicky games, and the worst mainline Mario game to appear on a home console*. After that, the line-up did slowly begin to pick up.

*Actually, that might be Sunshine, thinking about it.

Dewt

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Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #22 on: May 07, 2020, 06:35:50 PM »
That's not the same as people thinking it's better than the Switch
It's okay, nobody actually thinks this

Sebastian Cobb

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Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #23 on: May 07, 2020, 06:37:16 PM »
Yeah I just ignored that bit 'cos it's silly.

I heard switch demand is so high people are buying replacement parts and assembling them.

I guess you could make the screenless switch light that they should've built!

Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #24 on: May 07, 2020, 06:41:30 PM »
I mean the GBA had awful lighting, but it's not shit in any other way.
I think it qualifies, there's no way a person who bought one 2001 didn't regret waiting 18 months at least a little bit though?




Anyone here buy a 2DS? I can imagine being lured in by the price but driven insane by the form factor. Could imagine the original 3DS's 3D feeling a bit embarrassing to people now, it's so easy to go off focus... fucking love my New 3DS XL though, as a piece of hardware it feels like this big fucking glorious last hurrah from a now baffling game system layout.

Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #25 on: May 07, 2020, 06:49:13 PM »
It's okay, nobody actually thinks this

This is true, people just say it.

Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #26 on: May 07, 2020, 06:51:33 PM »
Game Gear. Fuckin' shite.

Just ate batteries. Took six AA batteries, which combined provided enough power to play for an hour or two.

Playing it in the back of my parents' car gave me terrible car sickness.

All the shops around me stopping selling games for it about six months after I got one, making it impossible to purchase any of the slow trickle of titles that came to the system.

Most of the games (assuming I'd been able to buy any) were available on the Master System for less money or were cut down versions of Mega Drive titles that looked shit in comparison.

The screen was really small when compared to how comparatively bulky it was.

All my mates had Gameboy's, meaning I couldn't even borrow games off 'em.

Sebastian Cobb

  • bad opinion haver
Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #27 on: May 07, 2020, 06:56:15 PM »
Game Gear. Fuckin' shite.

Just ate batteries. Took six AA batteries, which combined provided enough power to play for an hour or two.

Playing it in the back of my parents' car gave me terrible car sickness.

All the shops around me stopping selling games for it about six months after I got one, making impossible to purchase any of the slow trickle of titles that came to the system.

Most of the games (assuming I'd been able to buy any) were available on the Master System for less money or were cut down versions of Mega Drive titles that looked shit in comparison.

The screen was really small when compared to how comparatively bulky it was.

All my mates had Gameboy's, meaning I couldn't even borrow games off 'em.

It could be worse. One of my mates got a lend of someone's Atari Lynx. At least the Game Gear had Sega franchises and Master System ports. This was just some shit halfpipe game where fuck all happened.

Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #28 on: May 07, 2020, 06:57:50 PM »
California Games?

That looked quite good, at the time anyway.

Re: Your shittest console
« Reply #29 on: May 07, 2020, 07:03:50 PM »
No-one in the history of time and space has argued sincerely that the Wii U is better than the Switch, though. EDIT: Except the poster four posts after yours.

I just liked the games better. The whole heavy controller with a huge screen on it thing was a shambles. I wouldn't argue that it was the better designed console.

Sorry, I read this as more a personal thing "which console were you the most disappointed with" and I did make sure that I wasn't just thinking of the switch because it was fresh in my mind.
Though, since someone mentioned the original GBA, no backlight, no frontlight, no sidelight, no nuffink. I can remember my heart sinking when I got that home, crying, burning my cheek on an anglepoise lamp, the light bouncing off the glossy screen and straight into my stupid face.

The guy who mentioned the N64 too, like him, it seems a bit unfair because it could well have been down to the meagre selection of pony games I had.

edit: Haha, I had an atari lynx as well.
You know what, I take it back, it's not the switch, is it?

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