Author Topic: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown  (Read 1288 times)

touchingcloth

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Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« on: May 23, 2020, 05:30:06 PM »
Anyone playing this year? I feel the required efforts will be Herculean, it’ll be the Olympics of not wanking, a Seb Noe, if you like.

Danger Man

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Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #1 on: May 23, 2020, 05:32:49 PM »
cuckdown

touchingcloth

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Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #2 on: May 23, 2020, 05:37:48 PM »
Wimbledong.

Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #3 on: May 23, 2020, 05:38:37 PM »
I'm 40 now and my sex drive seems to have almost entirely effed off.
I could probably do this without even trying!

Tony Tony Tony

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Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #4 on: May 23, 2020, 05:40:47 PM »
Surely Bozza will make one of his Churchillian announcements soon that it is now allowable to release the python and we will be back on Beef Strokenoff by June. I mean C'Mon...     

After all Carrie has a new baby, he'll be off the nest for a good few weeks.

QDRPHNC

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Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #5 on: May 23, 2020, 05:44:25 PM »
Isn't this just for the masturbatory equivalent of emotional eaters?

Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #6 on: May 23, 2020, 05:53:18 PM »
Y no wank?

Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #7 on: May 23, 2020, 06:34:01 PM »
Fucking no chance, I'd like that self discipline. There are some people who edge themselves for extra torment.

kittens

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Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #8 on: May 23, 2020, 06:42:24 PM »
every year this challenge seems to get more and more easy

Elderly Sumo Prophecy

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Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #9 on: May 23, 2020, 06:42:39 PM »
Imagine the first wank after abstaining for a month. The resulting torrent of jizz would probably hit the ceiling with the same force as if you'd severed an artery.

BlodwynPig

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Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #10 on: May 23, 2020, 06:48:51 PM »
Imagine the first wank after abstaining for a month. The resulting torrent of jizz would probably hit the ceiling with the same force as if you'd severed an artery.

After my phimosis/ballinitus/urethra constriction operation, my first piss in the hospital once the tube had been removed was like a fire hose. I was thrust backwards, such was the jet propulsion and my dick just coiled around uncontrollably leaving the whole bathroom covered in piss and blood. My first wank (stitches still in place) was a similar and even more euphoric.


Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #11 on: May 23, 2020, 07:01:31 PM »
I can't remember why, maybe I was just fed up or something but I went for a long time without a chug in my youth and when I finally got round to it, the orgasm was weird, felt much more like an itch was being scratched, but not pleasurable at all.
Next one was back to normal.

phimosis

I had that! I remember some friends talking about wanking and it sounded a lot different to how I was doing it. When I got home I tried to wrestle down the old polo neck but nothing was happening so I sort of grabbed my foreskin by the aardvark nose bit and pulled up and there was a weird popping sensation and I eventually managed to wrestle it down and out popped my helmet all shiny and new for the first time!
It was tight for a long time but I raxed it in like a new pair of trainers.

imitationleather

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Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #12 on: May 23, 2020, 07:13:29 PM »
I had that!

Well duh. You're not allowed to sign up here if you've not suffered from it.

chveik

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Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #13 on: May 23, 2020, 07:13:35 PM »
isn't this supposed to be in january?

edit: no that was the booze thing

imitationleather

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Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #14 on: May 23, 2020, 07:14:38 PM »
isn't this supposed to be in january?

It's traditionally November.

Why the hell would people want to put themselves through this when there's nothing else to do?

Small Man Big Horse

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Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #15 on: May 23, 2020, 07:25:05 PM »
Anyone playing this year? I feel the required efforts will be Herculean, it’ll be the Olympics of not wanking, a Seb Noe, if you like.

This would be the first year since 2005 that I could fairly enter as I've no longer a chemical advantage as I'm not currently on antidepressants. But like everyone else (bar kittens) my answer is fuck no, there's no chance I'm giving up one of my very few pleasures during the lockdown.

kittens

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Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #16 on: May 23, 2020, 07:49:04 PM »
i can't remember the last time i had a wank. well. i can remember it but it definitely wasn't today.

Angrew Lloyg Wegger

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Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #17 on: May 23, 2020, 08:16:44 PM »
What is point

BlodwynPig

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Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #18 on: May 23, 2020, 08:27:44 PM »
What is point

that thing clenched in your fist

Mr Eggs

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Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #19 on: May 23, 2020, 08:49:35 PM »
I'm planning a week off in June just to get drunk and wank.

Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #20 on: May 23, 2020, 08:54:52 PM »
I'm planning a week off in June just to get drunk and wank.

Cummings told to rethink story.

machotrouts

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Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #21 on: May 23, 2020, 08:55:03 PM »
The forfeit for everybody is if you do a cum you have to do your cum on Zoom and I have to watch it because I'm gay and hot for cum.

Mr Eggs

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Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #22 on: May 23, 2020, 09:03:24 PM »
The forfeit for everybody is if you do a cum you have to do your cum on Zoom and I have to watch it because I'm gay and hot for cum.

Now I'm wanking thinking about machotrouts wankng.

Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #23 on: May 23, 2020, 09:09:32 PM »
Now I'm wanking thinking about machotrouts wankng.

Gogglecocks.

touchingcloth

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Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #24 on: May 23, 2020, 10:00:48 PM »
Now I'm wanking thinking about machotrouts wankng.

I’m wanking thinking about Mr Eggs wanking about thinking about machotrouts wanking.

Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #25 on: May 23, 2020, 10:05:51 PM »
Absolutely no chance. In thinking of getting the CHC98 gang back together, if anything. Been tanning myself a new glove made from springbok hide for the occasion. Done some amazing stitching work with white gold thread. Brushed my mustard and burgundy suede baseball jacket.

Mr Eggs

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Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #26 on: May 23, 2020, 10:29:00 PM »
I’m wanking thinking about Mr Eggs wanking about thinking about machotrouts wanking.

If you want some Isle of Man emblem shit. We can make it happen.


Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #27 on: May 23, 2020, 10:30:29 PM »
The forfeit for everybody is if you do a cum you have to do your cum on Zoom and I have to watch it because I'm gay and hot for cum.

Sometimes it comes out cold.

touchingcloth

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Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #28 on: May 23, 2020, 10:32:14 PM »
If you want some Isle of Man emblem shit. We can make it happen.

I’ve just wanked over the Isle of Man man.

Re: Jerkless June 2020: The Lockdown Cockdown
« Reply #29 on: May 24, 2020, 01:57:24 AM »
Shouldn't this be Jizzless June for accounting purposes ?

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