Teaching yourself new musical instruments

[popcorn]

What with all this lockdown business I have recently been living, for the first time in 15 years, with dear old mum and dad.

I've played guitar and piano for 1000 years, and competent at both. This week it occurred to me that there is an entire cello in the house that I'd never touched. It's my mother's, though she's not really able to play any more. How hard could it be, I thought. Here are my first-day findings:

It is, to someone who can play guitar and/or bass guitar, sort of easy to move your fingers around and go pluck pluck twong ping, sort of play it like an upright bass, or what I imagine playing an upright bass is like. But that's not cello, is it? I mean, not proper cello.

This bowing business is dreadful, very counter-intuitive, how do you stop it sounding so fucking bad?

Can people really just magically put their fingers on the right place to find the notes? Why wouldn't you at least draw frets on the damn neck? (I know this is to do with things like intonation but fuck off if you think I'm going to understand about that.

Cellos are big but they're lighter than you'd expect.

All the YouTube videos go on about the correct way to hold your wrists and elbows and fingers and thoughts. If you don't do these you will never make it on cello. It reminds me of how my girlfriend always says I'm holding my chopsticks wrong, and yet my chopstick skills get results. I'm self-taught on guitar and piano, I wonder how far I can get away not playing by the rules on one of these grown-up ponce instruments? You can't tell me what to do, Dad.

How are you doing with your new musical instruments?

[idunnosomename]

i cant believe your dear mum and dad havent rammed that cello up your arse by now

bowing is really really hard and that's why you start pizzicato to learn the instrument

frets on a guitar are there because they were originally designed to play chords, not because it helps you to know where to put your fingers. if it helps you learn, mark out the pitches on the neck with chalk. eventually you won't need them, like you won't need to mark out C C# D on a keyboard

[popcorn]

frets on a guitar are there because they were originally designed to play chords, not because it helps you to know where to put your fingers.

I know how guitars work, all my whinging was done in whingy jest.

[idunnosomename]

look mate just get back to learning all six of bach's cello suites

[Dewt]

I keep making the mistake of wanting to learn instruments that cannot be made quiet and being an apartment dweller.

You can't learn the ocarina when every time you pick it up you have to worry about the neighbours, mate.