Author Topic: Desolation VI: The Covidian Wastes  (Read 14282 times)

Re: Desolation VI: The Covidian Wastes
« Reply #570 on: September 17, 2020, 12:36:54 AM »
Your skeleton's had enough, and fucks off into the night. The slamming of the door sends brief ripples across the still sentient remains: a sac of helpless, meaty slop.

Re: Desolation VI: The Covidian Wastes
« Reply #571 on: September 17, 2020, 12:39:12 AM »
"Don't break my legs, my achy, breaky legs!" moans Billy Ray Cyrus. But that won't save him. Oh no. Once more comes the golf club.

Re: Desolation VI: The Covidian Wastes
« Reply #572 on: September 17, 2020, 12:44:07 AM »
The phone rings: your spouse has won the lottery! But unfortunately it's the industrial accident lottery. They will be returned to you in a small plastic bag. Which they'll need back, by the way.

pancreas

  • The islets of Langerhans are the very best islets
Re: Desolation VI: The Covidian Wastes
« Reply #573 on: September 17, 2020, 04:17:51 AM »
You rub Vicks Vapo-Rub over the end of your penis to distract from the pain of losing an ebay auction for a replacement apple mac charger.

Re: Desolation VI: The Covidian Wastes
« Reply #574 on: September 17, 2020, 12:16:13 PM »
You're accused of being Sinophobic for declaring Tang Village's crispy beef as "horribly greasy".

Sebastian Cobb

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Re: Desolation VI: The Covidian Wastes
« Reply #575 on: September 17, 2020, 12:40:54 PM »
"Where any of those Addidas trainers not stolen, Gary?"

"No, Daz. No."

Hahahaha!

Pingers

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Re: Desolation VI: The Covidian Wastes
« Reply #576 on: September 17, 2020, 04:49:14 PM »
Sex offenders edition of Guess Who?

"Did yours used to work for the BBC?"

Glebe

  • But when Bruce Wayne goes it's all gonna collapse.
Re: Desolation VI: The Covidian Wastes
« Reply #577 on: September 17, 2020, 08:43:02 PM »
You accidentally click on a BDSM vid as your relatives arrive.

batwings

  • Timewaster seeks same. No timewasters please.
Re: Desolation VI: The Covidian Wastes
« Reply #578 on: September 17, 2020, 09:52:15 PM »
Your unforgivable funeral wank makes it onto the crematorium's Xmas tape.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

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Re: Desolation VI: The Covidian Wastes
« Reply #579 on: Yesterday at 12:05:11 PM »
The contents of an intemperate noodle sachet put paid to monthly Scat Night

Glebe

  • But when Bruce Wayne goes it's all gonna collapse.
Re: Desolation VI: The Covidian Wastes
« Reply #580 on: Yesterday at 12:39:43 PM »
An arse acts disrespectfully in a public venue.

Re: Desolation VI: The Covidian Wastes
« Reply #581 on: Yesterday at 01:08:32 PM »
Moomintroll accidentally posts an obscene limerick into the group WhatsApp.

touchingcloth

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Re: Desolation VI: The Covidian Wastes
« Reply #582 on: Yesterday at 02:49:21 PM »
You watch The Usual Suspects for the twentieth time, and are still surprised by who Keyer Soze is.

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