Author Topic: Children's programmes you watched as a child that absolutely do not hold up  (Read 2249 times)

Dannyhood91

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Hi I’m here to be a negative nancy and discuss the kids programs of your youth that have absolutely not held up.

Angela Anacando which I remember liking 20 years ago but the animation style is something I find inherently bothersome now
https://youtu.be/bH1IOyYjKPk

Cubix which suffers from its early CGI ageing poorly
https://youtu.be/xqV9d4PSpME

Cramp Twins which I thought was shit at the time probably due to having two of the most unlikable main characters I can recall
https://youtu.be/4BOjINPi_Dk

Donkey Kong has become so bad it’s good again
https://youtu.be/sAZy9lp5KC4

I wasn't and still am not a fan of Angela Aneconda, but I will say it hasn't aged a day and still looks and feels utterly unique.

Thinking about stuff that doesn't hold up for me, I still have fondness for a lot of the stuff people my age reel off when this question comes up, so I will proffer a hot take; Animaniacs, or at least the segments with the three main characters, whose personality never goes beyond "wacky". There's a persistent forced wackiness to everything which comes off as very awkward. In its day it developed quite a following on the nascent internet for its pop culture deep cuts, but that sort of humour features in even the blandest of animated films now and we're all sick of it. The grating music score is like Carl Stalling played at the wrong speed. It's not a worthless show, but far from the new classic it seemed at the time.

Pinky and the Brain holds up better, but is more hit and miss than I remembered. I never liked Freakazoid! whose main character is Poochie-level obnoxious.

The Lurker

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I was a big fan of Angela Anaconda as a kid but watching some of that back is painful. I was also a big fan of the video game Bubsy 3D which has since has been recognised as one of the worst video games of all time.

I think it's safe to say that, as a kid, I was both very easy to impress and an idiot.

Monkey Magic

Spent my teens and 20s convinced that it was the greatest TV show when I was a kid.
Bought it when it was released on DVD when I was in my 30s and it's absolutely shit.

Took me quite a while before I dared to revisit anything else I remembered fondly in case my childhood was further ruined.

Brundle-Fly

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Jim'll Fix It 

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Jockice

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Jim'll Fix It 

Well, somebody had to post it.
Now then. Now then. Etc.

Mister Six

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Haven't watched it since, and I think I thought it was shit at the time, but in retrospect having the protagonist constantly trying to get into a threesome with a pair of twins was a bit of a dodgy subplot for Dr Zitbag's Transylvania Pet Shop.


I always used to get that mixed up with Little Dracula, which I recall having jokes about Madonna's cone bras, a reference I didn't get and now I do get it I don't know why they were there.

Shaky

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He-man, obviously. Laughable shit which has inexplicably become very popular again.

Replies From View

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He-man, obviously. Laughable shit which has inexplicably become very popular again.

Since a kid I’ve always had the suspicion he was meant to be called He-Ro which would be why his female counterpart was called She-Ra.


Never bothered checking though.  I’ve also never checked whether their civilian names are Ron and Sheila.

Since a kid I’ve always had the suspicion he was meant to be called He-Ro which would be why his female counterpart was called She-Ra.


Never bothered checking though.  I’ve also never checked whether their civilian names are Ron and Sheila.

Despite the obvious homo-erotic undertones of He Man, it's taken until recent modern She Ra for them to fully embrace the gay.

Bad Ambassador

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They were Adam and Adora.

Funny how you often see feminised versions of male names, but never the other way around. I've never met a man called Deborum or Barbaro.

Tony Tony Tony

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I would like to put forward Here Come the Double Deckers which I loved as a small child in the early 70's. On catching an episode fairly recently I realised it was notable only for its theme tune.

https://youtu.be/BsEeVOchA78

It was a kind of sub Childrens Film Foundation effort put together by a UK/US collaboration, which is probably why it inexplicably featured an US actor who played the drums (hilariously known as Sticks).

It is probably best remembered for launching the early career of Aswad's Brinsley Forde. The remainder of the gang of stage school brats seem to have faded from showbiz,(Peter Firth excepted) though a regular guest star was Melvyn Hayes who pretty much played Melvyn Hayes. I am guessing he got the part on the strength of the connection to Summer Holiday... maybe it was the same bus?


amateur

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Count Duckula was boring then and it's boring now. Nostalgia has done it a lot of favours, favours I would argue it does not deserve.

So wrong

He-man, obviously. Laughable shit which has inexplicably become very popular again.

The aesthetics of the toy line were always brilliant, plus there was a short-lived rebooted cartoon series in 2002 which was very good.

Count Duckula was boring then and it's boring now. Nostalgia has done it a lot of favours, favours I would argue it does not deserve.

Ooh, Duckypoos!

Shaky

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The aesthetics of the toy line were always brilliant, plus there was a short-lived rebooted cartoon series in 2002 which was very good.

None of the toys had any nipples, which is major design oversight in my book. What sort of child accepts nipple-less action figures? You couldn't even collect tokens to send away for the nipples, like with Mumm-Ra from the Thundercats.

My favourite thing about He-Man is Skeletor's He-Man imitating robot, Faker





Weird that it didn't work.

I would like to put forward Here Come the Double Deckers which I loved as a small child in the early 70's. On catching an episode fairly recently I realised it was notable only for its theme tune.

https://youtu.be/BsEeVOchA78



I always think that's true of a lot of kids TV. The lazy nostalgia of the last 20-30 years proclaims nearly anything with a memorable theme tune as being brilliant. Partly the internet's fault.

Rentaghost had a smashing theme tune, but was utter shit and even as a kid I didn't like it. Although Timothy Claypole was a great character.

Dex Sawash

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Star Blazers has a good theme (only)

https://youtu.be/eMcrep48Wz0


I always think that's true of a lot of kids TV. The lazy nostalgia of the last 20-30 years proclaims nearly anything with a memorable theme tune as being brilliant. Partly the internet's fault.

Rentaghost had a smashing theme tune, but was utter shit and even as a kid I didn't like it. Although Timothy Claypole was a great character.

I would put Rentaghost in this thread - the latter years. Banging theme tune though and the early episodes were something quite different from what I remember of seeing them a few years ago - almost Play for Today level drama.
« Last Edit: June 18, 2020, 02:15:56 PM by paruses »

Was horrified to discover as an adult that the Alberto Frog segments on Bod weren't even animated. Just a camera pointed at a picture book. Really disappointed in myself that I accepted that as entertainment when I was a child.

Bod however is even better as an adult. You can really taste the Taoist subtext.

kngen

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I would put Rentaghost in this thread - the latter years. Banging theme tune though and the eay episodes were something quite different from what I remember of seeing them a few years ago - almost Play for Today level drama.

Yeah, the first series had the not-ghost bloke anchor it by trying to keep a vague sense of order (so they didn't get evicted or something, I dunno) and there was a tension there. After he buggered off, and the focus switched to the obvious breakout star Timothy Claypole, it lost that element and wasn't nearly as watchable, just silly. Even 8-year-old me could tell something had gone awry.

JesusAndYourBush

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I would put Rentaghost in this thread - the latter years. Banging theme tune though and the eay episodes were something quite different from what I remember of seeing them a few years ago - almost Play for Today level drama.

I have a similar view.  For me, the reason the later episodes aren't as good is because of the pantomime horse.  Once they introduced the horse every episode seemed to revolve around it and it ruined the dynamic.

Only as an adult have I noticed that He-Man the toy and He-Man the cartoon character actually look fuck all like each other. The toy is much bigger, more aggressive and wild looking.

My nomination would be Rude Dog and the Dweebs. My dad used to get really annoyed with me watching it and would say things like "Switch that off. It'll rot your brain." I didn't know what he meant back then, but having watched some clips recently I'm fairly sure I could actually feel my brain rotting in real time.

Tony Tony Tony

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My nomination would be Rude Dog and the Dweebs. My dad used to get really annoyed with me watching it and would say things like "Switch that off. It'll rot your brain." I didn't know what he meant back then, but having watched some clips recently I'm fairly sure I could actually feel my brain rotting in real time.

You got me to thinking there about parental disapproval of certain shows. Whilst there always seemed to be a kid in my classes at school, invariably a tad weird, who was barred by his parents from watching ITV, individual show bans were less common. I only recently found out that my wife was unable to watch Tiswas as a child because her mother wouldn't allow it to pollute her TV.   

The Adventures of Jizzle Twizzle 1957-62, Gerry Anderson. Before my time, but looks like it would join the ranks of Noddy and the Black and White Minstrels Show today if anyone had ever heard of it due to some topical racial characters.



Enthralingly titled episodes such as 'Twizzle And Footso Go Fruit Picking' and 'Jiffy Opens a Barber's Shop'.

I'm 50 and Twizzle was over even when I was a kid. My only real memory of it is an old annual which I liked because he was sort of a superhero.

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