NeOL ◔̯◔

[darby o chill]

He moved to New Zealand. And added another station to his Positivity Radio network.
This one is for plants.

"We ran an experiment with two plants, one of which we neglected and the other we played Positively Plants to. The difference was absolutely amazing, and then we played those tones, because it's all about tones, we played those tones to the plant that didn't look so good, and it perked up again."

Noel says this will not mark the beginning of a wider broadcasting career Down Under, however, as he is now retired. He said: "Kiwis can rest easy. I'm not going to inflict myself upon this proud nation. I'm not bringing Mr Blobby over. I'm here to behave.

I quite like it. Good for him.
Positively Plants

[bgmnts]

"With his stupid ewok head."

[Blumf]

Shine on you zirconia diamond

[Ambient Sheep]

Noel's surprise move to New Zealand comes months after he rubbished reports that he was planning to move away from the UK.

In January 2019, weeks after his disappointing turn on I'm A Celeb where he was the first to be voted off, he released a video online where he said: "Apparently I'm so crushed following my experience on I'm A Celebrity I'm putting my house on the market and skulking off to New Zealand.

"It's a matter of record that I had a fabulous time, the production were wonderful, the reaction of the British public coming out to me were truly humbling and I'm really grateful for that reaction."

Addressing claims by The Sun at the time that he was selling up for a new life in New Zealand, he said: "The house that I have in the UK was put on the market a couple of years ago and is now sold and they were told all this last week and they've still run the story that apparently I'm going to skulk off to New Zealand. It is absolute disgusting lies."

Why on earth would you lie about something like that?

Unless it was before his out-of-court settlement went through and he was worried that if the bank thought he was fucking off to NZ they wouldn't be so bothered about paying up.  But even so, no need to lie so blatantly like that.

[darby o chill]

You people make me sick. Neol is trying to heal but all you can do is mock.
If you had a radio station it would be called Positively PANTS.
_{They played frog noises a while back}

[touchingcloth]

I'm not bringing Mr Blobby over.

It's astonishing that he thinks anyone would imagine that he would do that.

[marquis_de_sad]

Why on earth would you lie about something like that?

Nothing about Noel will ever surprise me. And also, any question about Noel's motivation can usually be answered with one word: spite.

[NoSleep]

He moved to Neow Zeolond.

[touchingcloth]

Nothing about Noel will ever surprise me. And also, any question about Noel's motivation can usually be answered with one word: spite.

Why did he speak to my snake on the phone that time?

[Ian Benson]

I've probably said this before here as it was all I talked about irl for ages, but Noel once wore the largest poppy I have ever seen on an episode of 'Deal or No Deal.' It practically covered his entire torso and looked heavy. By the second half of the show he was having to lean on things constantly, and appeared exhausted and unwell, often starting a sentence and then holding his finger up halfway through as if he was going to be sick, but that was a price he was willing to pay to remember more and better than the rest of us. By the end of the episode he was on all fours, calmly saying "no" repeatedly as he shook his head violently and dry-heaved.

[marquis_de_sad]

Why did he speak to my snake on the phone that time?

Compassion.

[Birdie]

WHAT THE FUCK

[Birdie]

This is just like when funny man Michael 'alright? Barrymore moved here.

DO WE HAVE NO STANDARDS, JACINDA?

[BlodwynPig]

[source]

[Birdie]

https://www.stuff.co.nz/entertainment/tv-radio/121635156/coronavirus-uk-media-star-noel-edmonds-hopes-nz-radio-network-will-aid-recovery

Arse

[BlodwynPig]

https://www.stuff.co.nz/entertainment/tv-radio/121635156/coronavirus-uk-media-star-noel-edmonds-hopes-nz-radio-network-will-aid-recovery

Arse

Your land is truly blessed to receive a visitation from the 4th Messiah.

[darby o chill]

Arse

NOT ARSE. Science.

Neol said he also had business plans, and he and his wife Liz were both interested in the environment.
"We have a small science business that has some very interesting technology - we are in the process of applying for patents - and it would be applicable to some of the challenges faced here with regard to water quality."

[BlodwynPig]

and it would be applicable to some of the challenges faced here with regard to water quality]and it would be applicable to some of the challenges faced here with regard to water quality

human extinction?

[Shit Good Nose]

This would explain why the grounds surrounding his house (which he tried to flog a couple of years ago with no success) are MASSIVELY overgrown.

[NoSleep]

"We have a small science business that has some very interesting technology..."

Surely science must have a restraining order in effect against Edmonds?

[darby o chill]

Such bitterness and jealousy. All of you (except NeoSleep). Maybe if you listened to some better radio your outlook on life would be brighter. Positively Gongs is my new fave.

[darby o chill]

Surely science must have a restraining order in effect against Edmonds?

I spoke too soon. Disappointed in you.

[madhair60]

That thread with his Lloyd's bank radio tirade was amazing.

edit: https://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/forums/index.php?topic=61782.0

[Quote]

Did anyone archive Noel's amazing Lloyd's baiting radio station?

[boki]

Quite surprised that his plant-healing tones don't just go "Woooo".

[darby o chill]

Did anyone archive Noel's amazing Lloyd's baiting radio station?

Yes, Twed kindly recorded 24 hours of it and Duncandisorderly edited it down to 2 hours but didn't include any music (I think?). I have it somewhere if they don't see this.

[madhair60]

Uploaded a while back: https://mega.nz/file/D01RmbwT#dexOL6G1qUvmNu4BWR9rRXDyMeDgMcBjOoiJGMuyFFI

[Captain Z]

B b b b b b b banksters

[shiftwork2]

Beloved avuncular Saturday morning TV host to West Country libertarian fruitcake who vowed to buy the BBC to New Zealand expat never mentioned again.  Quite a ride, and he still looks the same.

Part of the heartbreak of Covid-19 is imagining all the Deal Or No Deal quiz machines sat in pubs unplugged in carpeted silence.

[petril]

he'll still be gurning at us from fruit machines for another four years or so until they cycle them out when the next gamblor industry innovation slowly creeps through the pubs like a manic, rave remix of the Dad's Army titles