I've just won a virtual meet and greet with Jessie Ware

[BlodwynPig]

Is this onlocationlive.com? There are other artists doing a similar thing and it's not exactly cheap. You have to get your 'selfie' with them done as soon as you can because of the 60-second time limit, which cuts off abruptly. Nice cash grab if you have hardcore fans.

Looped. They will send the video of the chat to you afterwards, presumably for no charge. If anyone wants my ticket code instead?

[DistressedArea]

Honestly can't think of a single celebrity I'd want to chat to.

[Huxleys Babkins]

I'd like to talk to Murray Walker.

"Hi Murray, you had unparalleled access to the world of motor racing for over 50 years, what are your favourite crisps?"

[Inspector Norse]

Is this onlocationlive.com? There are other artists doing a similar thing and it's not exactly cheap. You have to get your 'selfie' with them done as soon as you can because of the 60-second time limit, which cuts off abruptly. Nice cash grab if you have hardcore fans.

I am sure that there are absolutely no issues with the concept of people paying for 60-second Internet video chats with celebs and that the whole thing will be hitch-free and not hijacked by pervs or weirdoes in any way.

[Shit Good Nose]

IT'S ON

Caveat: you have to use your phone, you have to install a new app, you have to chat in a waiting room with other fans (no doubt young dweebs), you get 1 minute with Jessie. Probably give it a miss...I'm too old for this.

Hang on...

So the "prize" is a 1 minute virtual chat over messaging?

That's fucking terrible.

At least the actual competition didn't cost you anything.

[Huxleys Babkins]

Hang on...

So the "prize" is a 1 minute virtual chat over messaging?

That's fucking terrible.

At least the actual competition didn't cost you anything.

OK. But imagine that Jessie Ware has managed to harness this "special app" to drain the life energy from any human participant. All it takes is one minute but multiply that by 100 participants and it gives her enough sustenance to survive for another year before she needs to kill again.

Sure, the competition appears to be free, but it could cost Blodders everything.

I'm not saying that this is going to happen, but it's the sort of thing you should always bear in mind when deciding whether to enter a competition or not.

[Shit Good Nose]

Good point.  And it wouldn't surprise me in the least if Blods has succumbed to at least one succubus before.  He's that way inclined.

[BlodwynPig]

I suffered from succubi invasion on a near nightly basis circa 1983-1990, I'm not lying.

Offering the code to anyone ANYONE!? If I don't use it, will she be dissing me on her next single?

[Shit Good Nose]

Mate, it probably won't even be her, just some intern using lots of emojis and text speak.

(full disclosure - I have no idea who Jessie Ware is and am only vaguely aware of her sister from Boss and Htman 47)

[Ferris]

Stare directly ahead. Say nothing for the full 60 seconds. Claim it is performance art if questioned.

[Pancake]

Spend 60 seconds pretending you've got connection issues and can't hear here, can you hear me? hang on I'll just go outside, how about now? etc

[Shit Good Nose]

"Oh, sorry, I thought you were Jessie J.  BYE." (dial tone)

[SteveDave]

IT'S ON

Caveat: you have to use your phone, you have to install a new app, you have to chat in a waiting room with other fans (no doubt young dweebs), you get 1 minute with Jessie. Probably give it a miss...I'm too old for this.

Go on there fully nude and proud but extremely erudite.

[BlodwynPig]

Go on there fully nude and proud but extremely erudite.

How do her handlers plan to avoid this?

[SteveDave]

Majick?

[Dusty Substance]

Holy shit, What's Your Pleasure? is really good.

I'm only three quarters of the way through as I write but this is a bloody great record. Not a duff track so far.

[BlodwynPig]

Holy shit, What's Your Pleasure? is really good.

I'm only three quarters of the way through as I write but this is a bloody great record. Not a duff track so far.

Can I nick this for my 1 minute chat?

[chveik]

ask her what does she think about the current state of the BBC website

[BlodwynPig]

Look, I'll gladly give my code away, I've got a paper to finish for Tuesday and I'm tired after an interview and meeting with Notre Dame Uni. today about Covid data.

,,,

,,,


something like that?

[jimboslice]

I met her once when I was checking wristbands on the main gate at Latitude. She didn't have a wrist band and had to point at her special sticker that said "Jessie Ware: Performer" or something along those lines. She was really nice to be fair, and I saw a few minutes of her doing a podcast with Adam Buxton later on. Can you ask if she remembers me?

[QDRPHNC]

If it's over Zoom, thank her for reaching out, then interview her for a management position in human resources.

[BlodwynPig]

Didn't bother in the end.

Just been listening to the album and the majority of tracks are lightweight disco tunes, below par Goldfrapp or late period Crazy Penis (P). However, Adore You and Mirage are excellent, albeit very familiar. Had to check that Adore You was not a cover.

[flotemysost]

"What are the best crisps?"

If her Table Manners podcast is anything to go by, I'm sure she'd have been quite happy to entertain this line of questioning.

Don't really know her music, but she and her mum seem like a great bunch of lads.

[BlodwynPig]

If her Table Manners podcast is anything to go by, I'm sure she'd have been quite happy to entertain this line of questioning.

Don't really know her music, but she and her mum seem like a great bunch of lads.

here you go...possibly her best

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ktQhlLplbI

[flotemysost]

^ thanks!

Also listened to What's Your Pleasure? today and thought (on first impression) it sounded like it could have come out about a decade ago, and I mean that in the best way possible - it felt like a proper nostalgia hit of 2010s silky disco pop, a little flimsy but satisfying enough.

[BlodwynPig]

It did seem watered down... for the best of that style try Róisīn Murphy's Overpowered, I don't think you can get better than that

coincidentally, Róisīn has interviewed Jessie recently

https://www.interviewmagazine.com/music/jessie-ware-roisin-murphy-music-album-disco

[Dusty Substance]

^ thanks!

Also listened to What's Your Pleasure? today and thought (on first impression) it sounded like it could have come out about a decade ago, and I mean that in the best way possible - it felt like a proper nostalgia hit of 2010s silky disco pop, a little flimsy but satisfying enough.

I don't get this "a little flimsy" criticism at all - I've listened to it all weekend and it's by far the best pop album I've heard this year.

[flotemysost]

To be fair I had it coming out my shitty laptop speakers while I was working and wasn't really concentrating on the details too much, but it feels like one I'll come back to.

[BlodwynPig]

I don't get this "a little flimsy" criticism at all - I've listened to it all weekend and it's by far the best pop album I've heard this year.

I'm the same as flote, laptop speakers - will revisit

[Dusty Substance]

Do it! I went out and bought the LP yesterday. Giving it a spin right now. A classic pop record.