Author Topic: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments  (Read 6768 times)

Petey Pate

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Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« on: July 03, 2020, 01:38:41 PM »
You know, when you feel the need to unnecessarily correct people on trivial falsehoods.

There was a kid at my school who would sing the Monty Python lumberjack song but as 'I'm a lumberjack and I am gay'.  I don't think I would have minded as much if there were more modified lyrics expanding on the lumberjack's homosexuality but no, that was the only line that he sang and it was wrong.

Fuck, that whole last sentence was pure accidental Partridge wasn't it. Anyhow, your turn.

madhair60

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Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #1 on: July 03, 2020, 01:40:47 PM »
Friend of mine constantly misquoting The Simpsons in ways that could never possibly be funny, raising the question of why on earth he even bothers trying to quote it.

I say friend, it's the same guy I always moan about. Slips into American accent for no discernible reason chap. Audiobooks. You know.

Thomas

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Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #2 on: July 03, 2020, 01:49:46 PM »
Stop getting Elasmosaurus wrong.

I've twice had the very same argument about whether or not Elasmosaurus was a dinosaur.

On the first occasion, my opponent cried (we were seven years old; a test of our best-friendship), and on the second (ten years later, at sixth form), my adversary insisted that she was correct because all of her dinosaur books said so. I commandeered the teacher's laptop and projector and demonstrated the facts on the whiteboard. The sore loser grumpily advised me to take it up with her parents, since they had purchased the books.

I often wonder when the third such argument will come.

touchingcloth

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Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #3 on: July 03, 2020, 02:25:31 PM »
I get it with scifi sometimes - I'll be watching and believing in blasters and lightsabers and aliens and The Force and all that, but an explosion will make a noise in space or a spaceship will manoeuvre like an aircraft and I'll be close to saying "cuh, like that would ever happen" out loud. 

Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #4 on: July 03, 2020, 02:26:49 PM »
if anyone colours the ground under a dinosaur green, i helpfully point out that there was no grass in dinosaur times.

touchingcloth

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Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #5 on: July 03, 2020, 02:29:21 PM »
if anyone colours the ground under a dinosaur green, i helpfully point out that there was no grass in dinosaur times.

It also pisses me off that the newer Jurassic Park films didn't put feathers on their dinosaurs. I get why they did it and that audiences would be nonplussed by massive T-Rex sized chickens, but I'd have found it fucking cool at least.

Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #6 on: July 03, 2020, 02:35:36 PM »
I think it's the continuity problems more than the accuracy upsetting people. unless they just didn't explain why none of the first ingen dinosaurs had feathers and now they do. but jurassic world was hardly going to take any risks

Jockice

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Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #7 on: July 03, 2020, 02:45:39 PM »
Someone I knew was convinced that the Hal Man Half Biscuit lyric 'if you ever wondered how you get triangles from a cow, you need butter, milk and cheese and an equilateral chainsaw' actually ended 'and an equilateral cheeseboard.' He quoted it to me while laughing loudly. I didn't have the heart to tell him he was wrong.

Thomas

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Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #8 on: July 03, 2020, 02:51:07 PM »
I think it's the continuity problems more than the accuracy upsetting people. unless they just didn't explain why none of the first ingen dinosaurs had feathers and now they do. but jurassic world was hardly going to take any risks

To be fair to the hollow continuation of the 'Jurassic franchise', it is explained that the dinosaurs were engineered to look classic and scaly for aesthetic reasons, and that they'd look very different if they were genetically accurate.

I reckon InGen's rivals will be breeding feathery lads in the next film, which be five hours long to accommodate all the cobbled-together fan service, product placement, and arbitrarily returning characters, building toward some sense of conclusion for a patchy series that should never have been a series anyway. And I will watch it.

petrilTanaka

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Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #9 on: July 03, 2020, 07:24:01 PM »
Someone I knew was convinced that the Hal Man Half Biscuit lyric 'if you ever wondered how you get triangles from a cow, you need butter, milk and cheese and an equilateral chainsaw' actually ended 'and an equilateral cheeseboard.' He quoted it to me while laughing loudly. I didn't have the heart to tell him he was wrong.

there should be a five quid fine for people who quote that wrong

Puce Moment

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Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #10 on: July 03, 2020, 07:28:19 PM »
aitch

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JesusAndYourBush

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Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #12 on: July 03, 2020, 07:47:26 PM »
aitch

I once had someone say "Of course it's Haitch, it starts with a Haitch dunnit?"  I didn't know how to argue with such stupidity so I left it there.

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Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #13 on: July 03, 2020, 07:49:37 PM »
I get it with scifi sometimes - I'll be watching and believing in blasters and lightsabers and aliens and The Force and all that, but an explosion will make a noise in space or a spaceship will manoeuvre like an aircraft and I'll be close to saying "cuh, like that would ever happen" out loud.
It's illogical, as Doctor Spock from Star Trek would say! (Remember the puppet of him on Spitting Images?)

monkfromhavana

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Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #14 on: July 03, 2020, 07:55:56 PM »
"It's Roy SCHEIDER, not fucking ROY SCHNEIDER"

Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #15 on: July 03, 2020, 08:08:44 PM »
To be fair to the hollow continuation of the 'Jurassic franchise', it is explained that the dinosaurs were engineered to look classic and scaly for aesthetic reasons, and that they'd look very different if they were genetically accurate.

I reckon InGen's rivals will be breeding feathery lads in the next film, which be five hours long to accommodate all the cobbled-together fan service, product placement, and arbitrarily returning characters, building toward some sense of conclusion for a patchy series that should never have been a series anyway. And I will watch it.
oh did they really retcon that? I only saw the other day they retconned the dilophosaur that killed nedry as a juvenile with a hologram of a full sized one

Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #16 on: July 03, 2020, 08:14:43 PM »
The apes and monkeys thing.

Jockice

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Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #17 on: July 03, 2020, 08:14:49 PM »
there should be a five quid fine for people who quote that wrong
Or indeed those who spell the band's name wrong.

Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #18 on: July 03, 2020, 08:26:22 PM »
Haha, can't spell loose properly!

Looser!

Sin Agog

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Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #19 on: July 03, 2020, 08:45:24 PM »
My brother would always say 'mineg' instead of 'mine,' and whenever I told him he was saying mineg, he'd indignantly reply, "I'm not saying mineg. I'm saying mineg.'

Tony Tony Tony

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Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #20 on: July 03, 2020, 09:13:22 PM »
As a kid one of our group could never say the word launderette correctly. He always said laundryette which irked the fuck out of me at the time. As he was the biggest and toughest amongst our gang no one ever dared correct him so it went by unpunished... mind you the occasions when a gaggle of fourteen(ish) year old boys discussed going down the laundryette were few and far between so I have no idea why I still recall it.

Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #21 on: July 03, 2020, 10:03:41 PM »
I once had someone say "Of course it's Haitch, it starts with a Haitch dunnit?"  I didn't know how to argue with such stupidity so I left it there.

My children tried that. I countered with why aren't the other letters called 'Feff', 'Lell', 'Mem', 'Nen', 'Sess' and 'Wubble-U' then?

(My children now regularly argue me into the ground...)

touchingcloth

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Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #22 on: July 03, 2020, 10:42:03 PM »
Scotch.

non capisco

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Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #23 on: July 03, 2020, 10:48:39 PM »
There was a kid at my school who would sing the Monty Python lumberjack song but as 'I'm a lumberjack and I am gay'. 

What was Stavros Halkias like as a child?

Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #24 on: July 03, 2020, 11:24:06 PM »
People spelling led as lead. The Guardian does this multiple times a day.

Twonty Gostelow

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Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #25 on: July 03, 2020, 11:33:59 PM »
People spelling led as lead. The Guardian does this multiple times a day.

They're also number one at wrongly using "Suits You, Sir!" in feature headlines and photo captions.

And a piece on The Goodies mentioned the opening theme's "Goodies... Goody-Goody Gumdrops".

i diskard them

Gregory Torso

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Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #26 on: July 03, 2020, 11:38:31 PM »
'Feff', 'Lell', 'Mem', 'Nen', 'Sess' and 'Wubble-U'

I like this. I'm going to use it at work whenever I have to confirm someone's name or postcode and see how long it takes me to get removed from the premises.

Cuntbeaks

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Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #27 on: July 03, 2020, 11:47:55 PM »
"It's Roy SCHEIDER, not fucking ROY SCHNEIDER"

Easy now big man, it's not worth it.

The Roofdog

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Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #28 on: July 04, 2020, 12:08:23 AM »
Does "pronouncing Bowie wrong" count? Because I cannot let it lie. It proper boils my piss because it's not like some obscure name you only ever see written down, you've heard it pronounced correctly on TV and radio and everywhere all the fucking time and you're doing it on purpose aren't you

Re: Your 'stop getting Bond wrong' moments
« Reply #29 on: July 04, 2020, 12:14:03 AM »
Does "pronouncing Bowie wrong" count? Because I cannot let it lie. It proper boils my piss because it's not like some obscure name you only ever see written down, you've heard it pronounced correctly on TV and radio and everywhere all the fucking time and you're doing it on purpose aren't you
funny thing is that no one has a problem with the knife

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