The big stupid Doctor Who companion face-mashing project

[Mister Six]

Oi oi. So I've been getting well into the face-merging website Artbreeder of late. More info here, but basically you can use an AI neural net thing to smoosh faces together.

So I fancy doing what that bloke on the YouTubes will never get around to, and figure out what the "average" Doctor Who companion looks like. It'll probably take months, because I'll need to do it when I've got some free time, and uploading to the site takes ages for each portrait (not to mention having to crop them properly so the AI will accept them). Still! It'll happen. Probably.

I might do an Average Doctor and Average Master too, at some point. But for now, can anyone tell me if I'm missing anyone from the list below, or if someone REALLY shouldn't be there? I'm trying to get an even number of faces per Doc (TV-only, which is a pain for Sixth and Seventh purposes, as I don't want to double up on Mel... though maybe that doesn't really matter), which is why some of them might seem oddly placed. I also want to cast the net fairly wide.

Cheers!

First Doctor
Susan
Ian Chesterton
Barbara Wright
Vicki
Steven Taylor
Katarina
Sarak Kingdom (yes)
Dodo Chaplet

Second Doctor
Polly
Ben Jackson
Jamie McCrimmon
Victoria Waterfield
Zoe Herlot
Brigadier Alistair Lethbridge-Stewart

Third Doctor
Liz Shaw
Jo Grant
Sergeant John Benton
Captain Mike Yates

Fourth Doctor
Sarah Jane Smith
Harry Sullivan
Leela
K-9 (?)
Romana I
Romana II
Adric
Nyssa
Tegan Jovanka

Fifth Doctor
Vislor Turlough
Kamelion

Sixth Doctor
Peri Brown
Mel Bush

Seventh Doctor
Ace
No one else :(

Eighth Doctor
Grace Holloway
Chang Lee (he's basically a companion at the end, and he tried to help Sly... and maybe he would have come back?)

Ninth Doctor
Rose Tyler
Adam Mitchell
Mickey Smith (not really till next season, but trying to even it out)
Captain Jack Harkness

Tenth Doctor
Martha Jones
Donna Noble
Wilf!
Astrid Perth (Kylie)
Jackson Lake (David Morrisey)
Lady Christina de Souza (cat burglar from Planet of the Dead)
Adelaide Brooke (suicidal woman from Waters of Mars)
No one else?

Eleventh Doctor
Amy Pond
Rory Williams
River Song
Craig Owens
Clara Oswald
Handles

Twelfth Doctor
Danny Pink (?)
Reporter bird from Dr Mysterio (?)
Ashildr/Me (?)
Nardole
Bill Potts
Missy

Thirteenth Doctor
Graham O'Brien
Ryan Sinclair
Yasmin Khan
Custard Cream biscuit

Not sure if I'll bother with War Doctor (I guess that would be Billie Piper again) or Minus-First Doctor from Chibnall's travesty of an arc. Thoughts?

[Malcy]

I wouldn't have Ashildr/Me there. Not a companion at all. I'd probably say the same for Danny Pink as well as the Mysterio girl.

[Ambient Sheep]

Your thread vill also go down on ze list...

[daf]

Not quite sure about the technicalities here, but is there a reason Tegan and Nyssa aren't in with the Fifth Doctor?

[pigamus]

I wondered that, if Sarah isn't with the Third!

[daf]

I'd also bung The Brig in with Pertwee - he's only in two stories with Troughters!

- - - - - - - - - - - -

(First Doctor :  Bret Vyon, possibly?)

[daf]

This might be a bit of a stretch, but Bernice Summerfield did do one on-screen story with the Seventh Doctor on some fan cruise video story called The Crystal Conundrum in 2004. *

Bernice Summerfield has literally never appeared in live-action before – she's a spin-off character, originally created by Paul Cornell for a novel series in the 1990s, and later migrated to the Big Finish audio dramas, where she was played by Lisa Bowerman. In The Crystal Conundrum, Bowerman takes the role to the screen for the first time, and basically nails it. An experienced theatre actor who's worked with McCoy countless times, she has no trouble recapturing the characters' dynamic, playing Bernice with just the right level of emotion and wry cynicism to balance the Doctor's clowning.

https://theflaninthehighcastle.wordpress.com/2016/02/06/somethings-always-lost-in-translation-the-crystal-conundrum/

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -
* (An amateurish load of unwatchable rubbish it may be - but it still would count as 'TV', wouldn't it? . . .  I mean, you'd have to watch the video on a TV, right?)

[Mister Six]

Cheers, but I'm sticking to the official episodes, otherwise it'll be a rabbit hole of increasingly obscure VHS-only fan adventures and the next think you know I'm having to include Colin Baker as the mysterious Time Surgeon or whatever.

Not quite sure about the technicalities here, but is there a reason Tegan and Nyssa aren't in with the Fifth Doctor?

I wondered that, if Sarah isn't with the Third!

Because of the vagaries of the morphing software it's best to have an even number under each Doctor, but really that's impossible isn't it?

So yeah, I'll stop playing silly buggers and figure it out.

[Mister Six]

OKAY, HERE WE GO!

Some of the base pictures might look a little off due to the way the AI imports the images (it's given poor Susan a teeny tiny bit of lip fuzz, I think), but this is the best I can do. I had to prize image quality over colour, and angle of head over everything else (if someone is turned too far to the side, they're useless). This is going to get a lot easier once we're past the 60s and we have better quality (and more frequent) promo pics, I think.

Basically, the way this works is that I'll combine pairs of companions with a 50/50 split of traits, then combine those combinations, again in pairs, until I've got an average companion for each Doctor. Then I'll fold together the Doctors' average companions, also in pairs, until we're done. Not sure what I'll do when I end up with an odd number. I had to resit my GCSE maths, for crying out loud!

THE HARTNELL COMPANIONS

Round one: Susan and Barbara
Here's Susan, with her slightly fuzzy lip (apols, Carole Ann Ford).


Here's Barbara, with her slightly fuzzy head (poor image quality + AI = sadness).


And here's the combined Susabra. Or Barbsan. I dunno. Definitely some male vibes going on here. I think Artbreeder got a bit confused. The colour/B&W stuff is going to look weird but it should even out by the end of all this, once we have companions of colour (in all senses).




Round two: Ian and Vicki
Here's good old Ian.


Here's Vicki, suffering from a fit of the McCartneys.


And here's Vickian. Wearing a toupee?




Round three: Steven Taylor and Katarina
The rather handsome Peter Purves.


The rather doe-eyed Adrienne Hill.


A catalogue model auditioning for membership of the Baader Meinhof Group.




Round four: Sara Kingdom and Dodo Chaplet
Sara Kingdom (with a bit of photoshopping to remove a ray gun from her chin).


Dodo Chaplet (shit, I just found a better picture... well, never mind).


Kingdodo!




Round five: Barbsan and Vickian








Round six: Katasteven and Kingdodo




Battle of the chins!




Round seven: THE ULTIMATE HARTNELL COMPANION
A prototype Sarah Jane Smith?

[Mister Six]

Is this an idiotic waste of time?

No, don't answer that.

I'm going to double up on a couple of companions, putting Brig in Troughton's and Pertwee's era and Sarah Jane Smith in Pertwee and Baker. I'm hoping I can selectively use crossovers like this to even out any odd-numbered companion collections (I'll be doing Mel/Ace for Sylv, too). It might skew the results a teeny tiny bit, but there are so many companions I don't think it'll matter, and it's not like this is being peer-reviewed or anything.

THE TROUGHTON COMPANIONS

Round one: Polly and Ben
Not a flattering angle, but this seems to be the one image anyone uses of Polly. Certainly the only colourised hi-def one I could find.


Smashing hi-def pic of Ben, too, although the upload to the AI makes it look a bit oddly textured.


But good grief, the offspring...! Say hello to Bolly...




Round two: Jamie and Victoria
Well the AI's done something odd to Jamie's eye, but compared to that last pic it's quite mild...


Lovely Victoria's looking a little low-def, but maybe it'll come out all right in the wash?


Aw, bless. Jamoria is a bit young for the TARDIS though, I think.




Round three: Zoe and the Brigadier
Colourised, so I don't know if that purple eyeshadow is accurate. It sure is groovy, though.


I know this is a chronologically inaccurate pic of the Brig, but hey - time travel!


No comment.




Round four: Bolly and Jamoria





A young signing for Leeds United's 1973 team.




Round five: THE ULTIMATE TROUGHTON COMPANION

(Yes, I know this probably isn't mathematically sound because it's not a pure 50/50 split, but bollocks to it, I can't think of a solution.)



Sleep well! I'll do another instalment tomorrow, or possibly later this week.

[Mister Six]

Hm, do you reckon I can count Grace as a companion? Only having three for Doc 13 is going to be a massive pain in the bollocks.

[daf]

Because of the vagaries of the morphing software it's best to have an even number under each Doctor, but really that's impossible isn't it?

You've got 9 companions in with Tom Baker - move Tegan in with the Fifth, and bin Kamelion off!

[daf]

Hm, do you reckon I can count Grace as a companion?

How about using the some from Big Finish if you need to top the numbers up  :

Eighth : Grace / Chang Lee / Charley Pollard* / Lucie Miller*

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -
* (officially TV canon thanks to the Night of the Doctor)

[daf]

Only having three for Doc 13 is going to be a massive pain in the bollocks.

bung in the Ruth Doctor or Ryan's Gran

(Good job, by the way. I'm really enjoying the results!)

[ImmaculateClump]

I remember an old whovian internet buddy describing a sexy sidekick to me as "a guilty handful of milky bar buttons", and I gotta say, I'm really struggling to pick her out.
These all look like murder victims from the central panes of a true crime book.

[daf]

Vicki with her hair in pigtails, or Romana 2 in City of Death?

[ImmaculateClump]

Mate, you put their hair in pigtails and they'll all be in the city of death before I etc.

I don't understand what's happening here. Are they all dead?

[Replies From View]

I approve of a companion list in which the Tenth Doctor doesn't have a fling with Rose and The Twelfth Doctor doesn't waste two-thirds of his time with fart-on-a-stick Clara.

[ImmaculateClump]

I'm torn between the shifty corpse and the youthful spoon-bender.
Seriously, what's happening here? It all feels like a trick question.

[olliebean]

I hate to tell you this after you've started, but if you create a new portrait using the Compose method, you can add as many parent pics as you like - i.e., you're not limited to just combining two pics at a time.

[Replies From View]

I know this is a chronologically inaccurate pic of the Brig, but hey - time travel!

Chronologically inaccurate in the sense that it looks like he died first?


It's bloody horrible this

[Mister Six]

You've got 9 companions in with Tom Baker - move Tegan in with the Fifth, and bin Kamelion off!

I'm going to shift Tegan and Nyssa to Davison, drop K-9 because he'll just fuck with the results and might not even get past the upload check, and then it's a more manageable number. Thanks though!

[Mister Six]

I approve of a companion list in which the Tenth Doctor doesn't have a fling with Rose and The Twelfth Doctor doesn't waste two-thirds of his time with fart-on-a-stick Clara.

Sorry, but I might change that, if I'm going to combine Mel twice over due to the significance of those characters with their respective Doctors. But then I'll have to do Adric twice. Grahhh!

bung in the Ruth Doctor or Ryan's Gran

(Good job, by the way. I'm really enjoying the results!)

Cheers, I was worried that this just looked like someone having a public nervous breakdown, and we already have a Glinner.

I'll put in Grace (the gran) as she's companion-ish in that first episode. I might combine Ruth Doc and The Moment as bonus companions, although then Billie Piper will be in it three time over.

How about using the some from Big Finish if you need to top the numbers up  :

Eighth : Grace / Chang Lee / Charley Pollard* / Lucie Miller*

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -
* (officially TV canon thanks to the Night of the Doctor)

Trying to stick to telly appearances only, otherwise I'll feel compelled to throw in Frobisher, and then things will get VERY odd indeed.

I hate to tell you this after you've started, but if you create a new portrait using the Compose method, you can add as many parent pics as you like - i.e., you're not limited to just combining two pics at a time.

Yeah but then it faffs about with lots of different combinations - this person's eyes, this person's lips with this person's smile - and I prefer the consistency of doing two at a time. Also, the results are a bit more interesting like that - unless you're introducing really weird elements to the group merge, everyone comes out as the same blandly attractive figure.

[pigamus]

I'm going to shift Tegan and Nyssa to Davison, drop K-9 because he'll just fuck with the results and might not even get past the upload check, and then it's a more manageable number. Thanks though!

Who votes to keep K-9 in *raises hand*

[daf]

Trying to stick to telly appearances only, otherwise I'll feel compelled to throw in Frobisher, and then things will get VERY odd indeed.

Heh, no problem - I just really really REALLY love Big Finish - so was just shamelessly promoting my darlings!

[Replies From View]

Do you mind that you are choosing faces that aren't all looking in the same direction?  The lovechild of Polly and Ben in particular has especially skewed angles.  I am afeard that it has two crowns to its head.

[Mister Six]

Yeah, it's not ideal but the AI is finicky during uploads and if you upload something low-res or fuzzy (or taken at an odd angle), the neural network can warp it, either making it look outright weird (like Jamie's glassy eye, but over a whole face) or just tweaking the details so it looks like a person, but not quite the person it's supposed to be. So I'm a bit restricted in terms of the photos I can use.

You've given me the idea to flip the faces around in Photoshop so they're at least pointing in the right direction though. I'll try that in the future. Hopefully once we get past the '60s, we'll have proper promo photos in a reasonable definition to work from, rather than upscaled-by-fans set pics originally scanned from wrinkly 'zines.

[daf]

wrinkly 'zines.

#specialistgrotmags

[olliebean]

Who votes to keep K-9 in *raises hand*

Aye, especially given that Kamelion is in there.

[Norton Canes]

Can you hurry up and mash Tegan and Nyssa please

Definitely do NOT want to see either of them mashed with Adric or Turlough