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Massive BEARD and job interview

Started by drummersaredeaf, July 27, 2020, 02:24:36 PM

Previous topic - Next topic
Got an interview on Thursday for a job I actually want, and am about to be made redundant from my current one.

I have however not trimmed my beard since the end of Feb. Ideally I'd like to take it to a barber to be made to look hipster rather than homeless, but that doesn't seem to be an option at the min.

So tell me, am I destined to have to trim the three inches of glory back down to 3mm and to reveal my new chin in the process? Is anyone interviewing at the min? And if so how dim a view is being taken on people looking like a sweaty dishevelled wreck?

Captain Crunch

Don't do anything but JUST mention in the interview how you like to do your bit for charity like growing a beard for women's health. 

bgmnts

Good luck for the interview.

Shave the beard, I'd say.

Quote from: Captain Crunch on July 27, 2020, 02:27:59 PM
Don't do anything but JUST mention in the interview how you like to do your bit for charity like growing a beard for women's health.

I wonder if I could set up a just giving and guilt them into donating. It might take the edge off a rejection letter.

Bernice

What's the job on a scale of ZZ Top understudy to baby's arse impersonator?

In an ideal world it shouldn't matter but... if you want the job and are about to be made redundant, it's better safe than sorry.

Quote from: drummersaredeaf on July 27, 2020, 02:41:10 PM
I wonder if I could set up a just giving and guilt them into donating. It might take the edge off a rejection letter.

The Human Fund

Quote from: Bernice on July 27, 2020, 02:46:56 PM
What's the job on a scale of ZZ Top understudy to baby's arse impersonator?

In an ideal world it shouldn't matter but... if you want the job and are about to be made redundant, it's better safe than sorry.

I'm normally like a Premier League six yard box in terms of length. And a Steven Seagal overhead shot in terms of density.

The job is in the civil service, so I think they'd prefer babies' arses to Eliminator.

idunnosomename

aren't you going to do it by zoom? just put a still up of a baby's arse

alternatively, wear a facemask and store it all inside


Cuntbeaks

Stop pussying about and shave it off you hairy faced cunt.

willpurry

Quote from: drummersaredeaf on July 27, 2020, 02:24:36 PM
Got an interview on Thursday for a job I actually want, and am about to be made redundant from my current one.

I have however not trimmed my beard since the end of Feb. Ideally I'd like to take it to a barber to be made to look hipster rather than homeless, but that doesn't seem to be an option at the min.

So tell me, am I destined to have to trim the three inches of glory back down to 3mm and to reveal my new chin in the process? Is anyone interviewing at the min? And if so how dim a view is being taken on people looking like a sweaty dishevelled wreck?


Buelligan

Quote from: drummersaredeaf on July 27, 2020, 03:51:19 PM
I'm normally like a Premier League six yard box in terms of length. And a Steven Seagal overhead shot in terms of density.

The job is in the civil service, so I think they'd prefer babies' arses to Eliminator.

The civil service was a very mixed bag when we last crossed swords.  I knew a Director General who would send women home immediately for wearing trousers, his grade 6 used to tongue sugar directly from the sugar bowl and I once had a meeting with a man, quite a senior man, in agriculture who was wearing a string vest. 

Maybe shave one side and present whichever cheek seems appropriate, that's my advice.

BlodwynPig

Its discrimination isn't it. Just wear your beard with intensity. If you don't get hired, sue them for discrimination against the hirsute.

Discrimination against the bald too. Jesus made me all wrong.

Where can I get a string vest in a hurry?


Buelligan

Just imagine them all with beards and you'll walk it.

BlodwynPig

Quote from: drummersaredeaf on July 27, 2020, 05:45:09 PM
Discrimination against the bald too. Jesus made me all wrong.

Where can I get a string vest in a hurry?

That is actually a legal argument. In Germany they have a law against discriminating against the bald. Diskriminierunggegenkahlegesetz

bgmnts

Will it grow back or this THE beard of your life?



It was almost harder to shave it than it was to grow it. Rest in peace, little mouse.

rue the polywhirl

Quote from: drummersaredeaf on July 27, 2020, 06:31:24 PM


It was almost harder to shave it than it was to grow it. Rest in peace, little mouse.

I see the outline of a black cat in that sink. That brings good luck or bad luck that does. Good luck!

QDRPHNC



idunnosomename

if it's skype i hope you start the call and they all look like ZZ Top so you have to hurriedly glue it all back on. what a crazy situation!

imitationleather

Quote from: idunnosomename on July 27, 2020, 09:56:53 PM
if it's skype i hope you start the call and they all look like ZZ Top so you have to hurriedly glue it all back on. what a crazy situation!

If that happens he should just say that he doesn't have a beard because he's the drummer.

bgmnts

Quote from: idunnosomename on July 27, 2020, 09:56:53 PM
if it's skype i hope you start the call and they all look like ZZ Top so you have to hurriedly glue it all back on. what a crazy situation!

He should stick it on with Velcro Fly.

A mate pointed out that I missed the chance to Pritt Stick some to my head a la Councillor Evans.

flotemysost

Quote from: Buelligan on July 27, 2020, 05:24:17 PMtongue sugar directly from the sugar bowl

Sounds like a dated innuendo, of the sort that might be made by this type

Quote from: Buelligan on July 27, 2020, 05:24:17 PM
a Director General who would send women home immediately for wearing trousers

Good luck with the interview, OP - I'd be surprised if any employers had a vehemently anti-beard stance, especially at the moment.

Completely different role/industry, but when I did agency work for wanky events, the presentation rules for blokes specified 'either clean-shaven or full beard', so stubble or a lone 'tache was their bête noire, it would seem. I'm sure as long as it looks clean and neat it'll be fine.

Edit: ahh it's gone. Well good luck anyway

notjosh

Quote from: drummersaredeaf on July 27, 2020, 02:24:36 PM
Got an interview on Thursday for a job I actually want, and am about to be made redundant from my current one.

I have however not trimmed my beard since the end of Feb. Ideally I'd like to take it to a barber to be made to look hipster rather than homeless, but that doesn't seem to be an option at the min.

So tell me, am I destined to have to trim the three inches of glory back down to 3mm and to reveal my new chin in the process? Is anyone interviewing at the min? And if so how dim a view is being taken on people looking like a sweaty dishevelled wreck?

Did the advert mention anything about long-haired freaky people?

idunnosomename

Quote from: drummersaredeaf on July 27, 2020, 10:23:40 PM
A mate pointed out that I missed the chance to Pritt Stick some to my head a la Councillor Evans.
YA FAT BASTARD!!! YA FAT BASTARD!!!!

Tony Tony Tony

Quote from: drummersaredeaf on July 27, 2020, 06:31:24 PM


It was almost harder to shave it than it was to grow it. Rest in peace, little mouse.


I reckon it was mistake to shave your pubes, unless you are hoping to seal the deal by whacking out an enormous cleanly shaved todger during the interview.

In all seriousness, as an ex civil servant myself, I would say make yourself as smart as possible, if you must have facial hair make it very neatly trimmed. Civil servants love to see neatness and be smartly dressed for the interview. Once you get the job you can do as you please, when I worked in the service there was a guy who would regularly wear the same tie for the whole of the week even if it was covered in breakfast on Monday (which it usually was). I also worked with some techie types whose fashion ideas seemed to be modelled on Roy Cropper, think socks with sandals.

The other end of the scale was when I did a visit to HQ in Liverpool and I got in the lift with a gaggle of girls who were wearing outfits that would have been considered too daring as stage gear for Girls Aloud as well as rollers in their hair. It turned out they were going straight out from work and wanted to look their best at least for the start of the night.