Author Topic: Scotchphiles, Unite!  (Read 791 times)

touchingcloth

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Scotchphiles, Unite!
« on: July 31, 2020, 01:39:01 AM »
I saw the word "Anglophile" earlier, and suddenly realised that while words like Francophile, Sinophile, Lusophile[1] are in relatively common usage, I wasn't aware of the same word for Scotland.

But here's the thing: I can't think of a time when I didn't fucking love the Scotch as much as Barry loves to fuck cats. I think alongside New Zealand it's the only national identity which I feel some kind of affinity with. So I googled what the word was and it turns out there isn't really one, but "Caledonophile" or "Caledophile" appear quite prominently, but the latter one has the dubious -dophile suffix made popular by people who love to fuck kids more than Barry (see above).

We should make our own word or sutin.

Do you love Scotland and The Scotch, for example CU Jimmy? Well let's post a wee dram of cheer and gift them a word for us to use about how much we love to fuck them.

Unfortunately the word for a lover of New Zealand's culture is the same as the one for people who love fucking birds and sticking their dick in fruit, so my other love shouldn't be discussed further in this thread.

I am drunk, yes. Because I lurve Scotland.
 1. And -phone in place of -phile.

Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #1 on: July 31, 2020, 07:29:07 AM »
‘Jockophile’ sounds like a combination of fun and menacing.  Therefore the perfect fit.

Mrs BB is Scotch.  Haven’t checked this with her yet, but will probably be ok.  She loves being called Scotch as it is.

Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #2 on: July 31, 2020, 07:31:48 AM »
fucking jock cunts

bunch of bloody haggisheads if you ask me

Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #3 on: July 31, 2020, 07:37:09 AM »
YOU FACKIN JOCK KANT

Captain Crunch

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Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #4 on: July 31, 2020, 07:42:09 AM »
Sweatophile. 

Yeah it's great.

BlodwynPig

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Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #5 on: July 31, 2020, 07:43:50 AM »
I saw the word "Anglophile" earlier, and suddenly realised that while words like Francophile, Sinophile, Lusophile[1] are in relatively common usage, I wasn't aware of the same word for Scotland.

 1. And -phone in place of -phile.

I looked up lusophile and the first page of google is something called Lusophile Portuguese Home + Lifestyle, don't tell me this is another Qanon target based in Praia de Luz.

Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #6 on: July 31, 2020, 07:52:06 AM »
fucking jock cunts

bunch of bloody haggisheads if you ask me

My English in-laws call the Scottish branch of the family "The Haggi" (They call our annual Xmas trip South "The Journey Of The Haggi")

Captain Crunch

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Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #7 on: July 31, 2020, 07:55:26 AM »
Wales is pretty sweet too; what would call that, Taffophile?

Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #8 on: July 31, 2020, 08:09:22 AM »
I once heard my dad refer to the people of Scotland as "porridge wogs". I like them though. I grew up holidaying in the countryside in Cumbria (full of weirdos) or Yorkshire (full of miserable cunts) so getting out to the cairngorms is always relatively lovely.

BlodwynPig

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Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #9 on: July 31, 2020, 08:10:13 AM »
Wales is pretty sweet too; what would call that, Taffophile?

Caerphillies

Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #10 on: July 31, 2020, 02:00:12 PM »
Scotophobia.

I like Limmy and the Glaswegian dialect and that's about it. I need to go to Scotland sometime, I think.

FerriswheelBueller

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Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #11 on: July 31, 2020, 02:12:57 PM »
I like Scotland a whole lot more than England. It is nicer.

Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #12 on: July 31, 2020, 02:42:22 PM »
Wales is pretty sweet too; what would call that, Taffophile?

Technically it would be Cambriphiles

SpiderChrist

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Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #13 on: July 31, 2020, 02:44:34 PM »
My Anglo-Asian mate lived in Glasgow for a while and referred to Scottish people as "Porridge Wogs". I was never sure whether to laugh or not.

Sebastian Cobb

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Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #14 on: July 31, 2020, 03:01:28 PM »
My Anglo-Asian mate lived in Glasgow for a while and referred to Scottish people as "Porridge Wogs". I was never sure whether to laugh or not.

I've heard this before, I know it's an abhorrent term but it does make me do a guilty lol.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

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Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #15 on: July 31, 2020, 03:23:50 PM »
Scot fetish

ollyboro

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Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #16 on: July 31, 2020, 03:37:51 PM »
Is Porridge wogs cancelled?

Rizla

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Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #17 on: July 31, 2020, 03:39:17 PM »
I like Scotland a whole lot more than England. It is nicer.
Depends where you go innit. Don't be fooled by the politics neither.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YiTYKjKg73s

Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #18 on: July 31, 2020, 03:40:56 PM »
Bit of a Scotchphile here. What are people up on Shetland like? Going there next year!

Rizla

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Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #19 on: July 31, 2020, 03:49:24 PM »
Bit of a Scotchphile here. What are people up on Shetland like? Going there next year!
They don't really consider themselves scots for a start. As in they'll say they're going to Scotland, rather than the mainland. Shetland's alright if you like fiddle music but don't like trees.

Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #20 on: July 31, 2020, 03:51:17 PM »
Shetland's alright if you like fiddle music but don't like trees.

That's perfect. I love fiddle music and have always hated trees.

Fr.Bigley

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Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #21 on: July 31, 2020, 03:57:49 PM »
I once heard my dad refer to the people of Scotland as "porridge wogs". I like them though. I grew up holidaying in the countryside in Cumbria (full of weirdos) or Yorkshire (full of miserable cunts) so getting out to the cairngorms is always relatively lovely.

Yer Da can gettaefuck mon. and Yorkshire is full of friendly cunts...cunts..but friendly like.

canadagoose

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Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #22 on: July 31, 2020, 04:05:50 PM »
Depends where you go innit. Don't be fooled by the politics neither.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YiTYKjKg73s
No big fan of the SNP as of late but this guy is intensely irritating. Aye cheers sunglasses man Neil Olivering it up to the camera, I'm guessing only anarchism works for this guy? If he's SSP I'll maybe take him seriously. If he's Labour then fucking lol.

Edit: Anyway to answer the topic, I've lived in Scotland 97% of my life and it's starting to irritate me. It's not as progressive as it lets on. But this is probably just lockdown getting to me, and getting way too much of my political input from Twitter.

Rizla

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Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #23 on: July 31, 2020, 04:18:03 PM »
No big fan of the SNP as of late but this guy is intensely irritating. Aye cheers sunglasses man Neil Olivering it up to the camera, I'm guessing only anarchism works for this guy? If he's SSP I'll maybe take him seriously. If he's Labour then fucking lol.
Fair do's - he's an auld acquaintance (!) of mine and I happen to enjoy his work but I appreciate he's not for everybody. His Corbyn thing was good, speaking of Neil Olivering it up. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cAnWfgyQlms

canadagoose

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Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #24 on: July 31, 2020, 06:05:01 PM »
Fair do's - he's an auld acquaintance (!) of mine and I happen to enjoy his work but I appreciate he's not for everybody. His Corbyn thing was good, speaking of Neil Olivering it up. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cAnWfgyQlms
I had a quick skip through it, I guess it's satire? Seems OK, I just wish he wouldn't eNUNCiate those STRESSED SYLLables quite so much. I think because of Neil Oliver I associate it with smugness and now I can't forget the association.

Sebastian Cobb

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Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #25 on: July 31, 2020, 06:39:34 PM »
Is Porridge wogs cancelled?

Craig is, Charlie continues etc.

Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #26 on: July 31, 2020, 07:11:08 PM »
They don't really consider themselves scots for a start. As in they'll say they're going to Scotland, rather than the mainland. Shetland's alright if you like fiddle music but don't like trees.

It sounds like a completely unsustainable love of fiddles, especially when you factor in the fire festivals and lack of trees.

Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #27 on: July 31, 2020, 07:19:00 PM »
I've always thought that the name "Scotchlandshire" is much more fetching than the brusque title the place has now. The inhabitants should also be called "Jockenese".

Scotchlandshirephile does feel a bit clunky though.
« Last Edit: July 31, 2020, 09:13:32 PM by Nice Relaxing Poo »

ollyboro

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Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #28 on: July 31, 2020, 08:14:37 PM »
The angry cunt I share my life with is a jock. As a result I hear loads of stuff about them. The latest story involved her mother's eighty five year old neighbour. He's had two falls whilst attempting to shower - probably a mixture of age, medication, and acute sexual frustration - he's also very shaky, but he still drives a fucking car. Badly. Typical Scotch.

Re: Scotchphiles, Unite!
« Reply #29 on: July 31, 2020, 08:43:29 PM »
Canadaphile over here

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