Star Trek: Desolation

[Fambo Number Mive]

Neelix is given some decks by Tom Paris and sells CDs of the "Neelix Remix", even though nowhere on the ship aside from the holodeck has a CD player.

[Glebe]

Picard fires Dr. Crusher and rehires the woman from who replaced her early on. "This is your new Mother now, Wesley."

[Glebe]

"Excuse me, is LeVar Burton attending this convention?"

"I'm not sure, but I'm the guy who plays Harry Kim - you can have my autograph if you want!"

"I DIDN'T ASK FOR YOU I ASKED FOR LEVAR BURTON!"

[Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse]

Only the third most disgusting course in the traditional Betazoid wedding buffet, next to Harry Kim's nakedness and Keiko's potato salad.

"Why did I marry her?" sighs Miles O'Brien.

stop taking the bleakness off the canon desolation with crap dead baby jokes

they have an actual dead child

he died because the tech that could have saved him was outlawed

Riker nearly breaks down over it

[pancreas]

The replicator file for cavolo nero becomes corrupted and produces dill instead.

[Glebe]

"Simba! His arms wide!"

"Are you okay, Sir?"

"Yes thank you, Mr. Worf. Commander Riker, will you please fetch me the pills from me desk."

[Fambo Number Mive]

Chief O'Brian has to restrain his friend after an alien delegation keeps calling him "Dr Basher".

Odo gets drunk and morphs into a giant middle finger.

[petril]

Odo keeps getting hold of Quark and telling him to turn round over the comm badge. behind Quark, as ever, is Odo's arm, extended all the way from security, showing a middle finger

Worf spends the early hours shouting "BEEF" at a replicator, in an array of emotional states

[Glebe]

Data visits Deanna to get counselling for his masturbation problem.

[Fambo Number Mive]

Jameway realises Voyager isn't lost in the Delta Quadrant but just outside Skegness.

[Glebe]

"Wesley, we want you to head up an investigation into some local anomalies. It'll be good experience for you. Now go and pick your team."

"Thank you Cmd. Riker, but as you know I have been struck down by a rare type of space sickness and must go back to Sick Bay at once."

"Man up."

[bgmnts]

"Pint of Carling please, Guinan"

[Fambo Number Mive]

Kirk refuses to lead an away mission as there will be no chance of showing his shirtless torso.

[pancreas]

Harry Kim's toilet clogged with the detritus from posh wanks.

[Registering to lurk]

Shades of Grey, but all the clips are of Harry Kim.

[Glebe]

"Captain, can I stay on for another season?"

"No Dr. Pulaski, Dr. Crusher is coming back from whatever the fuck she was doing so fuck off."

[Mr Trumpet]

Chakotay drawing his "tattoo" on, every single morning, terrified of being found out and bullied by Tom Paris

[Fambo Number Mive]

The Enterprise D bridge crew have a competition to see who can inhale Worf's farts for the longest and not throw up. Riker is the winner at 7 seconds.

[pancreas]

The Enterprise D bridge crew have a competition to see who can inhale Worf's farts for the longest and not throw up. Riker is the winner at 7 seconds.

very good

[pancreas]

Replies From View refuses to open the pod bay doors as he is tied up installing holographic teeth.

[Glebe]

"Sir, can I get my own spin-off series?"

"I'm not sure that I can 'make it so', Mr. Worf.

[Glebe]

Harry Kim is commanded to get into an escape pod which is shot into a wormhole.

[Captain Poodle Basher]

Harry Kim is commanded to get into an escape pod which is shot into a wormhole.

He emerges in a distant part of the galaxy which is populated entirely by other Harry Kims all shot into a wormhole in millions of different multiverses.

The one event they all share.

[Glebe]

He emerges in a distant part of the galaxy which is populated entirely by other Harry Kims all shot into a wormhole in millions of different multiverses.

The one event they all share.

They try to form a utopian society but end up killing each other.

[Captain Poodle Basher]

They try to form a utopian society but end up killing each other.

The distant corner of the galaxy reverberates to a massed cry of "THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE HARRY KIM!" before the slaughter begins.

The rest of the galaxy doesn't even notice.

[Fambo Number Mive]

A wormhole opens in Riker's anus.

[pancreas]

... the other end opens up in Worf's anus and until they can get back to the Enterprise from the shuttle, they must engage in a 48 hour tug of war to push impacted shit back up each other's digestive systems.

[Glebe]

At a ceremony in her honour at Starfleet Academy, Janeway thanks Harry Kim for "being the perfect example of everything an ensign shouldn't be."

[Glebe]

"Sir, the anomaly is growing!"

"Can't we get Wolverine to sort it? Oh yeah wrong thing."

[Mr Trumpet]

Voyager finally gets home. Janeway insists on doing a victory lap.