Get back in the cubicle, wage slave!

[frajer]

Examined objectively, Lord Sugar is the name of an Adventure Time character. The greatest trick this grifter cunt ever pulled off is convincing us otherwise.

[Pearly-Dewdrops Drops]

Easy for Lord Sugar to say. He's too short for the coronavirus particles to stick to him. Walks right under them humming a tune.

[Sebastian Cobb]

Maybe if his em@iler wasn't a steaming pile of shit people would already be doing their business from home.

[Huxleys Babkins]

On a completely unrelated note, Alan Sugar has a billion quid invested in commercial property in London.

[jamiefairlie]

This looks awfully like the music industry's reaction to Napster and mp3s, and will End the same way.

[finnquark]

caffeine filled air

[Huxleys Babkins]

This looks awfully like the music industry's reaction to Napster and mp3s, and will End the same way.

The establishment didn't give a fuck about the music industry. They care about this.

[GMTV]

When a chunk of jobs have been cut, and another chunk moved to a 'high value' centre, having to put a shirt on and engage in some shite banter whilst making a cup of tea might not seem so bad.

[H-O-W-L]

As a member of the truly proletarian min-wage working class retailoid scumbag caste I truly marvel at how shit things get the higher you climb. All I have to worry about is rotten watermelons that stink of vinegar.

You know, and the slow, crushing press of alcoholism and urban decay and the inevitability of being crushed in the wheels to grease the money machine.

[ElTwopo]

caffeine filled air

"Caffeine, son. Nothing else in the world smells like that. I love the smell of caffeine in the morning. You know, one time we had a load of coffee, for 12 hours. When it was all over, I walked up. We didn't find one of 'em, not one stinkin' receptionist. The smell, you know that caffeine smell? The whole office. Smelled like... nothing. It is completely odourless, you understand. Err... what was I on about again?"

[wooders1978]

I had a frankly fucking unbelievable conversation today -

A colleague messages me on slack "Can I call u please? I need some help"
Sure... ring ring

Me: are you ok you're slack status says you're out sick?
Them(sounding shite): no I've got a cold but I'm working for a few hours
Me: ok mate, well at least you don't have to go to the office
Them: nah, I went in yesterday though, but it's only a cold so...
Me: Are you joking? Did you not feel ill yesterday?
Them: I did but it's only a cold
Me: have you been tested then ?
Them: nah, but I know it's only a cold

And THAT is why they can get to fuck with their pressure to go back - doesn't know it's not coronavirus and even if it isn't, I don't want your cunting cold either pal.
I'm sort of horrified and delighted at the same time as I will be citing that conversation should anyone want to pressure me to heading back

[idunnosomename]

The establishment didn't give a fuck about the music industry. They care about this.

i dont know I think the riaa had enough lobbying power to keep people buying music on optical media in plastic cases for as long as possible

[Cloud]

A colleague messages me on slack "Can I call u please? I need some help"

Not the point you were making, but this shit right here...

[Sends message asking a very simple question]

[Receives call saying "yeah about your message" and giving a verbose verbal version of what would've been like a two word response]

Just.... type back?

[Pinball]

The implication is that we aren't working when at home, and can only be considered to be 'properly working' when in the human beehive. Nonsense.

And the feudal system trying to convince the peasants that peasant life is glorious fun. Fuck off. I hope the commercial property sector crashes and burns, and that the Duke of Westminster, Lord Sugar and all the other commercial property-owning elite fuck right off.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Seeing commercial property crash and burn sounds fun, I might take a trip into town to watch and pick up one of those brilliant 'sandwiches' that I've been reading all about.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Edit woops

[Pinball]

Corporations are well worth any human sacrifice, apparently. Corporate lobbying power in action. Wow.

[Huxleys Babkins]

i dont know I think the riaa had enough lobbying power to keep people buying music on optical media in plastic cases for as long as possible

Lobbies are one thing. There's very few people in government who don't have their fortunes invested in properties, funds or businesses directly affected by this. They'll legislate people back into the office to protect that if they have to.

[GMTV]

Need some UK based sweatshops opened. No need for Chinese imports any more.

Fuck it get the mines back open.

[Pinball]

Send the Army round the country to round people up and get them back in the beehives. Who cares if we're still in the middle of the deadliest pandemic for a century.

[Sebastian Cobb]

I would absolutely like to see a massive acrimonious fracture between rich cunts that own the buildings and rich cunts that own the businesses over this issue.

[olliebean]

Meanwhile:

[Cloud]

"B-but Pret a manger.."

[Alberon]

Two bits from the Torygraph.

Firstly Johnson praising WFH while launching the HS2 link.

I think loads of people have had the benefit of working from home.

It's been magnificent and it's definitely enhanced people's quality of life in many, many ways and I congratulate people on the hard work they've put in from home

That's nice.

But I've got absolutely no doubt that mass transit transport infrastructure is going to be crucial for our country, not just now, but in the decades ahead.

Get back in the cubicle, scum! Clap for Pret!

Meanwhile, 'Business Leaders' want the rules changed to get people back in the offices where they belong.

Business leaders have told the Government to change its guidelines on Covid security after complaining that only one in five desks can be used in some offices.

Alok Sharma, the Business Secretary, met the bosses of six major employers on Thursday where he was told more must be done to get people back into the workplace.

It came as new figures showed footfall in high streets in August remained 42 per cent down on last year despite the success of the Eat Out to Help Out scheme and heavy discounting in shops.

Senior executives from Rolls-Royce, Natwest, Unilever, British Land, EY and the law firm Dentons were among those on the call, where they detailed a series of obstacles in the way of people getting back to the office.

One source close to the discussions said: "The Government's guidance on social distancing in the workplace means some small offices can only get a fifth of their desks back in use.

"There are a lot of other problems, including people's fears about using public transport, a lack of childcare and insufficient testing and tracing. All of these things are getting in the way."

At this point why not just launch a stay-at-home tax for everyone not going into work so these poor, poor landlords can survive?

And finally, the government denies it ever planned a 'get back to work' plan while detailing how it will work when it is launched.

On Thursday The Telegraph revealed that a back to work advertising campaign, which had been due to launch Friday, had been postponed until at least next week, following disagreements in Government about the way forward.

The Prime Minister's official spokesman added to the confusion by saying "there has never been a back to work campaign", describing the delayed newspaper campaign as just the latest phase in an ongoing public information service.

The spokesman said there would be content on social media over the weekend directing businesses to the latest Government guidelines, followed at some point by newspaper advertisements encouraging the public to go back to work.

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/politics/2020/09/03/back-work-business-leaders-tell-government-help-changing-covid/

[Cloud]

At this point why not just launch a stay-at-home tax for everyone not going into work so these poor, poor landlords can survive?

Don't give them ideas.

[Pinball]

Empty offices. Housing shortage. Office conversions.

Just saying.

[Butchers Blind]

Empty offices. Housing shortage. Office conversions.

Just saying.

Thats already happening round where I live.  Three massive office blocks around the town centre have been turned into apartments in the past couple of years.

[idunnosomename]

Lobbies are one thing. There's very few people in government who don't have their fortunes invested in properties, funds or businesses directly affected by this. They'll legislate people back into the office to protect that if they have to.

oh im sure. but the music distribution industry was mostly a US thing, and they had fucking massive power before they had to relent and start endorsing spotify which gives musicians about 8p a year

at least we still have Earache being cunts here though (Carcass back on streaming, lads!)

[Sebastian Cobb]

If anyone wants a crying booth for them or their children now looks like the time.

[Puce Moment]

Back at work for the first time since March.

My inbox has been full since 3 August. Fucking result.