Author Topic: Alien news  (Read 2968 times)

Glebe

  • But when Bruce Wayne goes it's all gonna collapse.
Re: Alien news
« Reply #30 on: September 14, 2020, 07:20:12 PM »
It's aliens.

[EDIT]Fuck's sake, new page for such a shit post twat. Here's Thomas' post from last page:

Two of the few photos we have of the forbidding Venereal surface,[1] snapped shortly before the probe was destroyed by atmospheric conditions aliens with hammers:



I'm always awed by photos taken on heavenly bodies. It's a pointless thing to say - as nature has no conscious plan for us, and our evolutionary development has allowed us to devise astronomical technology - but there's an eerie sense that we were never meant to see these places. But I suppose any old orangutan is only a few thousand years of neurological evolution away from inventing spaceships and peeking at Mars. The humble fish might imagine that it's never supposed to see the forest. Just give it time, mate.
 1. we've all got one

Sebastian Cobb

  • bad opinion haver
Re: Alien news
« Reply #31 on: September 14, 2020, 07:21:29 PM »
Microbes, eh?

Nothing really to shout about. Someone left a calipo on the dashboard of my astra and I got ants living in it.

Blue Jam

  • I'm gonna smack your face off of your face
Re: Alien news
« Reply #32 on: September 14, 2020, 07:23:44 PM »
It's aliens.

[EDIT]Fuck's sake, new page for such a shit post twat.

Nope, that's great.

Blue Jam

  • I'm gonna smack your face off of your face
Re: Alien news
« Reply #33 on: September 14, 2020, 07:27:05 PM »
As in astronomers started about things like “the Venusian atmosphere”, because people’s minds went to the gutter when they said “the Venereal atmosphere is highly acidic”.

Do crabs like acid?


Glebe

  • But when Bruce Wayne goes it's all gonna collapse.
Re: Alien news
« Reply #34 on: September 14, 2020, 07:33:15 PM »
Nope, that's great.

Very forgiving Bluey!

I wonder if they have Sausage and Egg McBacon on Venus?

touchingcloth

  • Member
  • **
  • You wanna plack the rick, you ha.
Re: Alien news
« Reply #35 on: September 14, 2020, 07:46:05 PM »

touchingcloth

  • Member
  • **
  • You wanna plack the rick, you ha.
Re: Alien news
« Reply #36 on: September 14, 2020, 07:46:54 PM »
Very forgiving Bluey!

I wonder if they have Sausage and Egg McBacon on Venus?

Yes. But the bacon is made of space crabs, the sausage is made of space pig cock, and the egg is exactly as you’d imagine.

Re: Alien news
« Reply #37 on: September 14, 2020, 07:53:21 PM »

God, look at that.

Loads of space to knock up a Greggs or a Cash Converters.


Blue Jam

  • I'm gonna smack your face off of your face
Re: Alien news
« Reply #38 on: September 14, 2020, 07:58:58 PM »
Very forgiving Bluey!

I wonder if they have Sausage and Egg McBacon on Venus?

Yes, but it's made of the f*fth m**t.

Re: Alien news
« Reply #39 on: September 14, 2020, 08:55:04 PM »
i love how shitty the USSR Venera programme was. it was like they were chucking rocks at a wasp's nest

Re: Alien news
« Reply #40 on: September 14, 2020, 11:44:03 PM »
It's a pointless thing to say - as nature has no conscious plan for us, and our evolutionary development has allowed us to devise astronomical technology - but there's an eerie sense that we were never meant to see these places.

And how do we know this? Did we figure out what nature was after?

Everything we do know about nature is that it compounds fitness payoffs via natural selection. Whether or not you think that's the grand plan or not, it's definitely a logical pattern of some description.

Ergo, we can't say it's definitely not intentional anymore than we can say that it definitely is. To do so is to presume we know what it is. We can only say that it is happening and it appears to be a pattern (evolution).

Re: Alien news
« Reply #41 on: September 15, 2020, 12:09:44 AM »
Mars died out because of jock itch and phimosis.

fit as fuck though


Re: Alien news
« Reply #42 on: September 15, 2020, 05:46:28 AM »
Quote
Greaves first spotted the phosphine signal late one day in December 2018 as she was about to leave work. “There wasn’t anyone to talk to and I remember thinking the best way to celebrate was to make a curry, so I drove off to Sainsbury’s,” she said.

She was featured quite a lot on The Sky At Night special yesterday evening, and came across as an annoying bellend. I hope she made a shit curry. One of her scientist mates also kept turning up with his guitar for some reason, playing phosphine based tunes that he'd come up with. Oddball.

Re: Alien news
« Reply #43 on: September 15, 2020, 08:23:08 AM »
That guitar was completely unecessary wasn't it?

'Maybe if we want to find alien life we have to start looking in some alien places', says presenter Chris Lintott. Which is presumably why they started in Cardiff.

Re: Alien news
« Reply #44 on: September 15, 2020, 08:35:42 AM »
There's clearly a ring pull from a tinnie in the first photo's foreground above, and a half-eaten Fray Bentos in the foreground of the second. Think on.

Re: Alien news
« Reply #45 on: September 15, 2020, 08:45:25 AM »
And how do we know this? Did we figure out what nature was after?

Everything we do know about nature is that it compounds fitness payoffs via natural selection. Whether or not you think that's the grand plan or not, it's definitely a logical pattern of some description.

Ergo, we can't say it's definitely not intentional anymore than we can say that it definitely is. To do so is to presume we know what it is. We can only say that it is happening and it appears to be a pattern (evolution).

Surely if the 'plan' nature has for humankind (or anything else) is just to continue spaffing our DNA into each other and expanding outwards everywhere, it could be argued expansion onto other planets fits in with that right good and proper. It's just more likely that it might be us, rather than say, scorpions.

The Mollusk

  • The answer my friend is blowing in the mind
Re: Alien news
« Reply #46 on: September 15, 2020, 09:22:50 AM »
So there are penguins on Venus after all.

Good to see that they've moved on from the moon.

Fucking hell I never thought I’d find anyone who knows Sack Trick! That’s made my morning.

Re: Alien news
« Reply #47 on: September 15, 2020, 09:44:32 AM »
Surely if the 'plan' nature has for humankind (or anything else) is just to continue spaffing our DNA into each other and expanding outwards everywhere, it could be argued expansion onto other planets fits in with that right good and proper. It's just more likely that it might be us, rather than say, scorpions.

Thing is that's really just another assumption. We look at our most recent history (which is really really tiny in cosmic terms) and presume we'll still be horny and hunting shiny benevolent sex planets 3000 years from now and for... what? At this rate of genetic acceleration it seems more likely by then our genitals will have shrivelled off into the evolutionary abyss like dodo dicks while our neocortical libidos scout for novelty on some other, less slimy dimensional plane.

I mean, fuck knows. Of course. But that's where we're at now. 96% of the universe still completely mysterious to our sensory apparatus. A planet melting and we can't even stop setting it on fire. Our Venusian cousins might be trying to spell out 'you're fucked mate' with the sulfuric remains of what happens to a global ecology when you leave the gas on. We might have missed something. We could be far more primative than we like to think.

Re: Alien news
« Reply #48 on: September 15, 2020, 09:51:25 AM »
I've got a mate who every time I tell him I'm stressed out about anything important basically goes "Arsed mate, singularity." On one hand I think he's got a point, on another hand part of me wonders if that's going to be our new version of hippies soon.

Thomas

  • please describe an encounter with a squirrel
Re: Alien news
« Reply #49 on: September 15, 2020, 09:58:14 AM »
And how do we know this? Did we figure out what nature was after?

Everything we do know about nature is that it compounds fitness payoffs via natural selection. Whether or not you think that's the grand plan or not, it's definitely a logical pattern of some description.

Ergo, we can't say it's definitely not intentional anymore than we can say that it definitely is. To do so is to presume we know what it is. We can only say that it is happening and it appears to be a pattern (evolution).

My (layperson's) understanding is that evolution is a blind, frequently dogged process without conscious oversight. If we look at its history, we'd have to conclude that any 'plan' it knowingly has is for species to evolve for a bit and then go extinct (with a success rate so far of 99.9%). Perhaps it just really likes fossils.

There might well be some conscious force behind it that is impossible to comprehend. After all, we can never rule out the possibility that we live in a demon's dream or an alien's 4D screensaver. I only phrased my comment as a definite fact because I thought it a waste of sentence-space to tag it with 'in my opinion'.

Re: Alien news
« Reply #50 on: September 15, 2020, 09:59:43 AM »
There's clearly a ring pull from a tinnie in the first photo's foreground above, and a half-eaten Fray Bentos in the foreground of the second. Think on.
i recall that's a bit of the soviet probe that fell off when it landed. lol

Thomas

  • please describe an encounter with a squirrel
Re: Alien news
« Reply #51 on: September 15, 2020, 10:01:33 AM »
i recall that's a bit of the soviet probe that fell off when it landed. lol

doesn't look good for Corbyn

The Mollusk

  • The answer my friend is blowing in the mind
Re: Alien news
« Reply #52 on: September 15, 2020, 10:23:56 AM »
Quote
Greaves first spotted the phosphine signal late one day in December 2018 as she was about to leave work. “There wasn’t anyone to talk to ...

"... so I had to say 'Get in, Greaves!' all to myself."

Re: Alien news
« Reply #53 on: September 15, 2020, 12:32:03 PM »
I've got a mate who every time I tell him I'm stressed out about anything important basically goes "Arsed mate, singularity." On one hand I think he's got a point, on another hand part of me wonders if that's going to be our new version of hippies soon.

Don't get it. Is he saying, "Could be worse. You could suddenly collapse into a singularity" or is he suggesting that the mere existence of singularities should offer you some comfort when things get too much for you?

Re: Alien news
« Reply #54 on: September 15, 2020, 02:08:19 PM »
Don't get it. Is he saying, "Could be worse. You could suddenly collapse into a singularity" or is he suggesting that the mere existence of singularities should offer you some comfort when things get too much for you?

The latter, but he's talking about THE singularity:

Quote
The technological singularity—also, simply, the singularity—is a hypothetical point in time at which technological growth becomes uncontrollable and irreversible, resulting in unforeseeable changes to human civilization. According to the most popular version of the singularity hypothesis, called intelligence explosion, an upgradable intelligent agent will eventually enter a "runaway reaction" of self-improvement cycles, each new and more intelligent generation appearing more and more rapidly, causing an "explosion" in intelligence and resulting in a powerful superintelligence that qualitatively far surpasses all human intelligence.

which he basically regards as only having positive outcomes, or at least ones so difficult to comprehend that our current problems wouldn't be recognisabl as such any more.

Re: Alien news
« Reply #55 on: September 15, 2020, 02:10:13 PM »
Basically we'll all upload our brains into some sort of orgasmic perpetual techno-nirvana or some shit.

Re: Alien news
« Reply #56 on: September 15, 2020, 02:15:44 PM »
Or the machines could rise up and enslave us all. Hasn't this cunt watched Terminator?

Shit Good Nose

  • Several bags of balls
Re: Alien news
« Reply #57 on: September 15, 2020, 02:16:53 PM »




Re: Alien news
« Reply #58 on: September 15, 2020, 04:56:19 PM »





Damn it SGN, I just made almost the exact same thing!
What do I do now?
To the Farage thread!!

Re: Alien news
« Reply #59 on: September 15, 2020, 05:05:28 PM »
How's it supposed to survive at 800 degrees? Without a space-suit? [fanciful]

Tags: