Author Topic: David Dickenson Deso.  (Read 20464 times)

Glebe

  • It's a fanny old mafia game, innit?
Re: David Dickenson Deso.
« Reply #330 on: May 04, 2021, 08:54:26 PM »
Ada has a clandestine meeting with Groom behind the shed that night.

"We don't have long Simon my love... I heard your telepathic message!"

"What?! That weren't me, Ada! I don't hold with this telepathic nonsense!"

"So who was it, then!"

Mark Curry steps out from behind a rake.

"'ello,  Ada love! Let's elope together!"

But Ada has already returned to the warmth of her single bed.

Glebe

  • It's a fanny old mafia game, innit?
Re: David Dickenson Deso.
« Reply #331 on: May 05, 2021, 11:24:02 AM »
H from Steps is working late in the garden one night when he notices the door of the big corrugated shed is ajar, misty vapour appearing to issue from within. Looking over both shoulders, he nips over and takes a peek inside.

The contents of the shed prove rather alarming; there before H from Steps stunned eyeballs sit numerous large plant pods. H from Steps is suddenly aware of a presence behind him.

"Oh dear, I seem to have left the door open."

"DAVID! Bloody heck, you scared the life out of me... whatever ARE they?"

"They are the future of this planet," explains David, starring vacantly through H from Steps, "when they hatch they will take over and eventually replace humanity. Do not resist it, H. Do not resist it."

Glebe

  • It's a fanny old mafia game, innit?
Re: David Dickenson Deso.
« Reply #332 on: May 06, 2021, 08:18:36 PM »
"Y'know what Peter Duncan I've bagged a lot of you lot from Blue Peter... maybe it's time to move on to something else?"

"How about the Press Gang cast, David?"

"Hmmm, I dunno... Dexter Fletcher's a film director now... but maybe Julia Sawalha is hard up... think she'd do landscape gardening for 50p an hour?"

"It's worth a shot David!"

"Didn't ask you, Mark Curry!"

"Sorry mate. I'll water the hyacinths."

Glebe

  • It's a fanny old mafia game, innit?
Re: David Dickenson Deso.
« Reply #333 on: May 07, 2021, 11:20:10 AM »
David introduces Marti Pellow to the rest of the crew. Pellow is scruffy and is carrying all his belongings in a Tesco bag.

"Show him the ropes, H. He'll need a shower first, the former Wet Wet Wet frontman fucking stinks!"

Glebe

  • It's a fanny old mafia game, innit?
Re: David Dickenson Deso.
« Reply #334 on: Yesterday at 02:20:50 PM »
"You know what, David?"

"What's that, Swashy?"

"You should try and bag Alan Titchmarsh! With his gardening expertise he'd be a real boon!"

Suddenly, a familiar Yorkshire voice pipes up behind them.

"David, these blooming weeds are a nightmare!"

David smiles smugly at Swash. "Way ahead of yah, Swashy. Way ahead of yah."

Glebe

  • It's a fanny old mafia game, innit?
Re: David Dickenson Deso.
« Reply #335 on: Today at 02:20:48 PM »
"Phew, finished doing the landscaping David, quite the task!"

"Good stuff Alan, you can take a five minute break! Oh by the way, never told you how much of a fan of y'show I was, what a theme tune!"


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