Unconscious Bias Training a.k.a Bigotfinder General (1968)

[thenoise]

Yeah unheard of, only 46% of doctors are women.

[DistressedArea]

Where I work we are required to remain conscious at all times.

[Sebastian Cobb]

It's not very progressive to assume that the kid was raised by parents in a heteronormative relationship tbf.

[evilcommiedictator]

My workplace has just announced that all managers are to undergo an anti-racial bias course courtesy of a local company.

The trick is now, to figure out which manager was being a racist arsehole and made everyone else waste their time

[JamesTC]

I dare you to put your hand up and ask if it is okay to say the n-word if you do it ironically.

[Cold Meat Platter]

Refer to unconscious race bias as the n***** in the woodpile.

[idunnosomename]

I can't operate on this child... because I'm a paedophile!

[machotrouts]

I can't operate on this child... I'm a woman

[chveik]

I can't operate on this child... it's baby Hitler!

[touchingcloth]

I can't operate on this child because he is an old black woman with a degree from a polytechnic.

[thenoise]

That riddle catches rather more people out if you choose a blue collar job - make his mother a plumber or a bricklayer. Unfortunately this doesn't make the 'point' that the original is trying to make, that it is high status jobs that we associate with men rather than physically demanding ones.

[paruses]

"I can't operate on this child, I'm a plumber"

[ETA - most of the "general builders" round here would probably still have a go, regardless]

[idunnosomename]

This baby is broken... I'm afraid I'm going to have to fuck it!

[Ray Travez]

I can't plumb this bathroom- it's my son!

[Buelligan]

They'll charge you a day's wages just to turn up and tell you that.

[Hand Solo]

Brothers and sisters have I none but that child's surgeon is my father's gender pay gap and work discriminated wife.

[monkfromhavana]

Why can't she operate on him?

She's a surgeon, she has the training, the experience and she's present.

[Buelligan]

Because her frail mind can't cope with the emotional strain, you little fool!

[Hand Solo]

How can you expect her to operate on the boy effectively trying to use surgical equipment with long painted fingernails and in-vogue large drop earrings and fashionable off-shoulder evening gown and resplendent fascinator catching on all the vital life-saving equipment?

[idunnosomename]

I can't be operated on by this surgeon: she's my mother!

[Hand Solo]

What if the riddle wasn't concerning a car crash but complications during the child's birth? The surgeon might be expected to perform a stressful Cesarean section or life-threatening epidural on the mother, procedures a woman simply wouldn't have the skill or presence of mind to administer with competence. Take that puzzlement pinkos!

[Buelligan]

I can't be operated on by this surgeon: she's my mother!

And then he woke to discover a steaming cup of piss beside the bed.

[Bernice]

A boy is in hospital with his mother, waiting for a heart transplant. "I'm so nervous," he says. She says "don't be. You're gonna pull through this, I know that for a fact."

He goes into operation. He comes out successful and runs to tell mum, but she's not there. He finds a little teddy bear with a card shaped like a heart. "Hey babe. Sorry I couldn't be there for you after your operation. But, I will always be in your heart. Forever. -Mum" You ask one of the nurses "Where's the mum I was with before my operation?" The nurse replies, "Didn't they tell you who the surgeon was?"

[Kelvin]

I can't be operated on by this surgeon: she's my mother!

"Well, don't talk too loud. Everybody will want one!"

[touchingcloth]

I can't operate on this child; he didn't thank me when I left that cup of tea and plate of biscuits in his bedroom for him.

[Inspector Norse]

I can't operate on this child: we are massively over capacity due to the pandemic following years of government cuts and we do not have any space, time or equipment.

[Hand Solo]

I can't operate on this child, we should just leave him alone with Captain Tom to sort out like we've done with the rest of the fucking NHS.

[Sebastian Cobb]

I could operate on this child, but as his mother I know what he's like.

[touchingcloth]

I like this child, but I couldn't operate a whole one.

[Icehaven]

Where I work we are required to remain conscious at all times.

Yeah I was thinking that, don't they mean subconscious?