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CaB Predictions

Started by bgmnts, October 16, 2020, 06:18:46 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

bgmnts

I'll get the ball rolling.

Quote from: Pinball on October 16, 2020, 06:17:24 PM
[Thailand] War with China next year.




Fambo Number Mive

Trump to win on November 3rd, Biden to blame the left of the Democratic Party.

Death penalty to return in UK in late 2021 for treason, murder of a copper and seeking to help the UK rejoin the UK.

Over 100,000 corona deaths in the UK by November 2021.

Farage to be offered a peerage by Johnson, which he refuses in order to carry on being a bigoted arsehole outside of the House of Lords.

There is a protest during the recording of Question Time, which leads to someone having a poo on the desk.

Johnson U-turns on his wind power announcement, but his supporters don't mind because it "owns the libs".

David Starkey to be offered a peerage by Johnson, who accepts.

Johnson has another book published.

By the end of 2021, 70% of pubs in the UK will be owned by Tim Martin. "Socialist comments" will be banned, as will left-wing Labour MPs (not that they would have gone to them anyway).

Cuellar


Kelvin

Nothing will be as bad as people here think, or as good as everyone else thinks.

imitationleather

Quote from: Kelvin on October 16, 2020, 06:54:25 PM
Nothing will be as bad as people here think, or as good as everyone else thinks.

Did this forum see the past five years going as badly as they have done though? I don't recall that.

Fambo Number Mive

I didn't predict a vote for Brexit, Trump winning first time round or the coronavirus pandemic being this bad.

Shit Good Nose

(Even more) fucked climate and Boris as PM were all reasonably popular consensuses, but yeah - I don't think anyone foresaw an actual Brexit or a pandemic at all.  Which makes you wonder what great stuff we have coming our way in 2025.

jobotic

All collective industrial action banned. First legal execution for trade union activities. Starmer doesn't object.

DFLA thugs sent into schools to forcibly remove suspected left-wing teachers.

Fambo Number Mive

Televised executions shown on all channels at 7pm, and people can also apply for tickets to be in the audience.

Twit 2

Pubes Daz found wallowing in a trough of smegma by Roger Scruton's nephew.

Breakthrough in science to make Shoulders more bald.

Pancreas to turn entirely yellow and irrelevant.

David Attenborough discovered corpsed in a frozen gurn, after trolley dildoing himself into cardiac on a penguin wank.

Shit Good Nose

Quote from: Fambo Number Mive on October 16, 2020, 07:13:03 PM
Televised executions shown on all channels at 7pm, and people can also apply for tickets to be in the audience.

"WHO LOVES YOU AND WHO DO YOU LOVE????"



oy vey

Me Three movement as gimps, sexual slaves, etc. demand equal rights to be pissed, shit on, beaten to a pulp wherever they choose.

Tony Tony Tony

The 'Is the PHWOAARR thread we have a bit rum?' thread reaches 10,000 posts and the whole forum explodes. (Next week)

Polymorphia

It's certainly far exceeded my expectations

JaDanketies

Biden wins and starts an intractable war asap.

steve98

A guy called Balls D'Moth wins Love Island and everyone goes crazy for moth's balls, to the extent that hardware stores can hardly keep up and fans take to castratin' house-moths.

Inspector Norse

Elon Musk has cyborg baby

Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse

The Green Party gets turfed out at the next election because diesel is more expensive and they didn't give us a ton of money and a free electric car. We re-elect the parties who ripped up the railways and neglected water and sewage infrastructure for decades.

After being left to wither on the vine with no EU money, Northern Ireland finally realises that Westminster doesn't give a shit about them. Irish reunification happens, driven by economic necessity. The Republic is forced to ditch Amhrán na bhFiann in favour of some shite that has verses in English, Irish and Ulster Scots which we all have to pretend is a real language. The Orange Order gets to have its poxy parades wherever it wants because Ulster Presbyterians are a protected minority group now.

This is not enough for the DUP, who morph into their final form - white supremacists. They prove far more effective than the scattered group of Euroskeptics, racists and conspiracy nuts that passes for the current Irish far right. Meanwhile Sinn Féin manage to put up enough candidates to win a comfortable majority at the next election, which they do when everybody finally realises that Fianna Fáil and Fine Gael are the same party with different names. All of Sinn Féin's lefty right-on rhetoric quickly proves meaningless now that they're in government and have to keep corporations and vulture funds happy.

The Ireland Simpsons Fans Party remains a fleeting dream.

Captain Z

Video games are gonna get more realistic.

Small Man Big Horse

Richard Herring starts a podcast where he weighs his testicles each week and bets on which one will be heavier, and after two weeks sets up a £20,000 kickstarter to fund more episodes.

Pinball

Xbox Series X Slim finally produced that fits under the TV.

And War with China, obviously.

touchingcloth

Paulie turns out to be Neil.

Alberon

Some really unlikely bad thing that would embarrass the worst hack writer on a soap will happen proving yet again that we slipped out of reality into some artificial parallel universe about five or six years ago.

imitationleather

Quote from: touchingcloth on October 16, 2020, 10:58:27 PM
Paulie turns out to be Neil.

I was thinking this earlier, as it happens!

rue the polywhirl

South Park, Family Guy and Simpsons all call it a day in the same year fingers crossed in the year 2021 and then in year 2022 peace on earth will happen.

bgmnts

Quote from: rue the polywhirl on October 16, 2020, 11:14:56 PM
in year 2022 peace on earth will happen.

Because of the eradication of the human race due to environmental catastrophes?

poo


rue the polywhirl

Quote from: bgmnts on October 16, 2020, 11:17:19 PM
Because of the eradication of the human race due to environmental catastrophes?

I'd like to think not. Rather, that the cessation of 3 classic but overly past-their-pasture programs is enough to erase a curse and lift the spirits of the human race, indirect or directly.

Dex Sawash

Neil turns out to be Paulie

Butchers Blind

Suicide will be the norm.