GVIINNER: cunt's gone bananas

[frajer]

Ohhhhh you've fucked up your life, you've fucked up your life,
Why not piss all over your legacy, you're already without wife
This play will be utter shite
Cos you've forgotten how to write
But keep saying it's happening cos you've fucked up your life

[JamesTC]

Hmm... I think I shall write "men are not women" on Twitter
Gasp, what if this is the final straw that gets my account banned?

[wrec]

But that's so far off, it's as likely as Glinner producing a hand-animated version of the entirety of Ovid's Metamorphoses, by next week.

I think what we might get is an awkward, tense Zoom table read with Arty as Dougal and The Penis Lady as Mrs Doyle. If the other collaborators refuse to stand up.for JK he can do a rewrite with Jack dressing as a nun, Ted getting banned off Twitter, Dougal tilting his head etc.

[dreamgirl]

But that's so far off, it's as likely as Glinner producing a hand-animated version of the entirety of Ovid's Metamorphoses, by next week.

Bloody Narcissus, just a fetishist trying to make his way into floral safe spaces, how dare he trample over biologically-real petal-based rights?

[MojoJojo]

If you're working on a musical and need money or aren't ready to put the full thing on, the first thing you do is to either record and release some songs, or do a concert-style performance of the songs (in whatever state they're in, knowing it's usual for one or more songs to be entirely dropped later). There haven't been any songs out of the Father Ted musical in any form, have there? Until we see some songs being performed, I don't believe it's real.

As I recall, someone else involved with it (Arthur Matthews? Sorry, I can't be arsed to look it up) has said they were just about to start stage rehearsals when the first lock down started. I don't think it's surprising that nothing has been released after that. It will probably never happen now - I imagine theatres are going to concentrate on old guaranteed crowd drawers for a while before taking a risk on anything new, but it does sound like it was happening before then.

[Alberon]

Plus there's been another year of Linehan going mad on the internet which can't help its chances much.

There's so many added hurdles for any project he's attached to that you can see why theatres (like the BBC and C4) would prefer to look elsewhere.

Pope Ted has a baked-in protest against it and it's going to be far more challenging than two priests with placards.

[idunnosomename]

Hmm... I think I shall write "men are not women" on Twitter
Gasp, what if this is the final straw that gets my account banned?

everyone will accurately say I'm a nasty cunt who deserves consequences to my consistently unpleasant actions!

I KNOW!
I'll fuck up my life, I'll fuck up my life
I'm a cunt who's gone bananas
So I'll fuck up my life

[Ferris]

It anyone can work lyrics from "turned off replies" into the thread title for #8 then nows the time to get workshopping.

[DrGreggles]

Glinner 8: My family have turned off replies

[GoblinAhFuckScary]

Yikes Glinner eight

[Ferris]

Yikes Glinner eight

I know. The pendulum of pity-to-disgust swings ever on.

[madhair60]

new thread + index already written up, will post soon

[JaDanketies]

Divorced, Beheaded, Died - Glinner the Eighth and his Turned Off Replies

[Ornlu]

I'll just say this: if I'd ever written a scene where some clueless characters ineffectually protest a piece of art that sits comfortably in the comedy consciousness and is ripe for imitation, I would simply not develop a lavish, unnecessary stage production of said property that is unavoidably and irreversibly tainted by my rampant, lightning-rod bigotry.

[Rich Uncle Skeleton]

getting my thread 8 name suggestion in early

yes I'm aware I look a right desperate cunt quoting myself

[pk1yen]

The show is about Ted being banned from Twitter so he becomes Pope in order to use the Pope's Twitter account.

There's no way that there wouldn't be - at the very least - some sort of Twitter-based stuff in there, right? (And probably not as good a premise as that.)

A certain type of (ex-) bluetick make it their personality the same way a certain type of stoner do with weed. Guarantee the opening scene would be Ted or Dougal sitting around on Twitter talking about Twitter, the same way every bad stoner script starts with a group of friends smoking weed and talking about smoking weed.

[GoblinAhFuckScary]

yes I'm aware I look a right desperate cunt quoting myself

Needs Arty Morty's face opposite a la Tom and Jerry

[Oz Oz Alice]

Can't do Photoshops properly, sorry

[Ornlu]

There's no way that there wouldn't be - at the very least - some sort of Twitter-based stuff in there, right? (And probably not as good a premise as that.)

In 100% seriousness, why else did he 'write' Turned Off Replies, when he's supposedly so busy with a FT musical and full-time trans hate?? This is all but confirmed afaic. IT'S GOING IN.

[madhair60]

New thread: https://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/forums/index.php?topic=85730.new#new

[GoblinAhFuckScary]

Can't do Photoshops properly, sorry

Ralf Hütter transformed into Caroline Lucas there

[petril]

I get the vibe that Neil Hannon got fed up of our grime trying to pitch shite ideas for songs at him and told him to politely fuck off

[An tSaoi]

I wonder what the plot is. Well, Ted becomes Pope, obviously. That seems a bit odd. But what then? The humour of the show comes from the fact that the guy who craves fame and attention is stuck on a backwards island that the outside world doesn't even know about, preaching to a small congregation of bored yokels. If he ends up being the most famous man in the church, that would be a huge departure from the premise of the show.

Would Dougal, Jack and Mrs Doyle come with him to the Vatican? What about the local characters? A load of funny Italians?

Maybe it's like the last episode of Yes, Minister, where he just becomes Pope at the very end, almost as a punchline. (I know they made Yes, Prime Minister, but never mind that right now.)

Maybe Cardinal McGuire ruins Michelangelo's Last Judgement and has to fix it à Bean The Movie. Cardinal Hackett crashes the Pope Mobile into a big wall?

[An tSaoi]

It should just be the exact plot of Dan Brown's Angels and Demons, but with the Ted characters, eg. Ted parachuting from a helicopter into St. Peter's Square to stop the antimatter from destroying Rome.

[TommyTurnips]

Half of the original cast are dead so I assume they would just go with all new actors. Ardal O'Hanlon might be up for it but Pauline McLynn might not be. She did refuse to be a part of that Father Ted documentary.

Spoiler alert

in which Glinner goes nuts at a little girl who is visiting the Father Ted house with her mum and dad because she says that she hasn't even seen the show. Bananas.

[close]

. So if they do get an all new cast for Pope Ted then my fear is that it could look a bit ropey in comparison. I don't know. Why even bother.

[sutin]

A Father Ted musical with none of the original cast co-written by the current mess of Glinner sounds absolutely fucking awful, doesn't it?