Very interesting reaction to my house piece [split topic]

[Zetetic]

Very interesting reaction to my house piece.

Been interesting seeing people ignore the words "little terrace" a d decide we must live in a huge townhouse. It's bigger now - that was the point of the works!

no wood cladding for our bathroom extension

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2020/dec/29/crammed-tiny-one-bed-flat-realised-i-loved-my-home

https://twitter.com/MichaelAHann/status/1344190117410439169

tl;dr I had so much money that I accidentally obtained an appropriate amount of accommodation for a short period, at no expense to myself.

[Zetetic]

"It had been worth £120. It wasn't now."

[jobotic]

you were brave to write it as any hint of home ownership draws huge opprobrium in social media and below the line comments land

[TheBrownBottle]

Oh fuck me I hate this whole 'all northerners are angry former miners who voted Brexit because Labour let them down'. It's such a narrow view of the north.

Quite right.  Some worked in shipyards.

[Buelligan]

Very interesting reaction to my house piece.

Been interesting seeing people ignore the words "little terrace" a d decide we must live in a huge townhouse. It's bigger now - that was the point of the works!

no wood cladding for our bathroom extension

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2020/dec/29/crammed-tiny-one-bed-flat-realised-i-loved-my-home

https://twitter.com/MichaelAHann/status/1344190117410439169

tl;dr I had so much money that I accidentally obtained an appropriate amount of accommodation for a short period, at no expense to myself.

"It had been worth £120. It wasn't now."

Thank you for exercising the muscles that line my veins and arteries.  Nevertheless, I'm glad I don't read the Guardian regularly for I would certainly die.

The fucking untouched value of a record never played.  Please let me post this abominable man-child to somewhere real forever.


_{Home sweet home ... Michael Hann in his new kitchen.  In his little, humble, unremarkable terraced
house with an imported Italian kitchen and polished granite worksurfaces.  Cunt.  Rockaway Beach. 
Cunt.}

[Icehaven]

you were brave to write it as any hint of home ownership draws huge opprobrium in social media and below the line comments land

Below the line comments land, that far away country where the nobodies with their nothing lives lurk and spit jealous venom at we charmed few in Above the line articles land. I suppose it's nicer to picture the faceless masses who dare to have an opinion on you as being from and in some distant place, rather than face the fact that they could live a few streets away or sit next to you on the train tomorrow. 

[Ferris]

Then, in February, came the first fears, as Covid-19 swept northern Italy. Our kitchen was coming from a company in northern Italy. And suddenly it wasn't.

The Horror. The Horror.

[Buelligan]

Below the line comments land, that far away country where the nobodies with their nothing lives lurk and spit jealous venom at we charmed few in Above the line articles land. I suppose it's nicer to picture the faceless masses who dare to have an opinion on you as being from and in some distant place, rather than face the fact that they could live a few streets away or sit next to you on the train tomorrow.

No wonder the Guardian fucks are so terrified of socialism.  Imagine what might happen to the curated value of their pristine fucking vintage tshirt collections.  Bigger guillotines, taller lampposts.

[Icehaven]

That island is woefully misplaced, there's not nearly enough space between it and the side on the left. It should either be another floor tile to the right or they need to admit the kitchen isn't really big enough for it and redesign it. Also it'd look a lot better without the smug prick standing in it, I'd be getting on to the builders about that for certain.

[Buelligan]

That stuff he said, the way he said it, like the builders were somehow victimising him.  It made me want them to bury him beneath that island and put it wherever the fuck they like. 

I wonder how many people died in northern Italy whilst that cunt was fretting about his trophy kitchen.

[king_tubby]

Below the line comments land, that far away country where the nobodies with their nothing lives lurk and spit jealous venom at we charmed few in Above the line articles land. I suppose it's nicer to picture the faceless masses who dare to have an opinion on you as being from and in some distant place, rather than face the fact that they could live a few streets away or sit next to you on the train tomorrow.

Ah yes, the people that buy the paper, click the ads, register page impressions, subscribe to the digital editions. Scum. Sub-human scum.

[Buelligan]

BTW If you do come on my timeline to tell me I am smug and over-privileged, I am just going to block you, because I can't be bothered with being insulted. I mean, you're free to say it, but I'm not going to pay attention.

Please upset the stans, Hann.

https://twitter.com/MichaelAHann/status/1344190118710669312

[idunnosomename]

i hope that cunt gets called a cunt so much he cant stop pissing his pants about it and his shitty smug house fills up with piss and he drowns in his own piss

[TrenterPercenter]

There was wonderful and not to mention world shaping article in the G yesterday about a man, who wasn't going to give up binge drinking, but was going increase drinking.  But, ha! what?! but that would surely be the exact opposite of what he is trying to achieve, oh dear! Can't wait to know his secret drinking sciences.

In reality the article amounted to said man having a kid and stopping binge drinking on one day for a couple of chekky beers on an eve most days.  However, then, even the idea of most days seemed too bad with having kid to look after so it fizzled out like panda's erection to "an odd glass of wine before dinner".   Hurrah! middle class values were restored and everyone felt good about having an M&S Chablis and staring into the beige void again.

It is a wondrously demented way of saying - I had a kid so I had to stop going out and getting mega pissed.  I reckon they have a big sack of these and pull them out like a raffle to see who gets the puff piece payment.

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2020/dec/29/i-had-outgrown-bingeing-and-hangovers-so-i-decided-to-drink-more-often

[Icehaven]

There was wonderful and not to mention world shaping article in the G yesterday about a man, who wasn't going to give up binge drinking, but was going increase drinking.  But, ha! what?! but that would surely be the exact opposite of what he is trying to achieve, oh dear! Can't wait to know his secret drinking sciences.

In reality the article amounted to said man having a kid and stopping binge drinking on one day for a couple of chekky beers on an eve most days.  However, then, even the idea of most days seemed too bad with having kid to look after so it fizzled out like panda's erection to "an odd glass of wine before dinner".   Hurrah! middle class values were restored and everyone felt good about having an M&S Chablis and staring into the beige void again.

It is a wondrously demented way of saying - I had a kid so I had to stop going out and getting mega pissed.  I reckon they have a big sack of these and pull them out like a raffle to see who gets the puff piece payment.

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2020/dec/29/i-had-outgrown-bingeing-and-hangovers-so-i-decided-to-drink-more-often

I've just listened to a 4 year old Adam Buxton podcast where he and Louis Theroux have a brief throwaway conversation about exactly the same thing. There's probably a 400 year old diary somewhere where someone comes to the same conclusion. Where does the Guardian find these hot take merchants?

[idunnosomename]

Toby Moses!

[Ferris]

Chuckled at "hot take merchants"

[jobotic]

Part of this delightful series. Read 'em and weep.

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/series/the-resolution-i-kept

[TheBrownBottle]

Part of this delightful series. Read 'em and weep.

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/series/the-resolution-i-kept

That took me twenty seconds to read and it still felt like too long.

One of these upper-middle-class twats should try writing an article on self-awareness.  Who knows, it might rub off a little introspection onto them.

[Paul Calf]

be glad she isnt on telly much because bloody hell she is every bit the annoying self-obsessed posho you'd expect

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MaoojXUITyY

(secret hour-long garun zoom stream with John Crace, just so you know what you're getting into)

Daily reminder that Marina Hyde shagged Piers Morgan. Presumably deliberately.

I learnt that about 20 years ago so the scales have long been removed from my eyes.

[idunnosomename]

Alistair Campbell's found a new grift to continue his career that no one can stop because if anyone did the entire pretence of impartiality that holds together british journalism would collapse

[Rizla]

...I love where I am: my little, unremarkable terraced house. Before lockdown, it was just bricks and mortar. Now it is a place I can scarcely bear to leave.

No, before lockdown it was an immensely valuable piece of real estate that you owned[nb]whilst still able to afford to rent a place and have savings to spunk on a new kitchen[/nb], it's still that but with a new kitchen. Fucking cunt.

(I've got those same kitchen tiles. But I laid them myself, rather than "put contracts out to tender". Because it's not that hard, and I am not a fucking mug.)

[Icehaven]

However much he acknowledges how lucky he was to have a friend who had a 'spare' flat across the road from his house that they could stay in rent free, I imagine any invitation to use it again might be withdrawn given how he effectively slagged it off. Bet his kids were delighted he's told everyone him and his wife preferred to sleep in a building site rather than share a flat with them too. All round nice guy, "I was sooo lucky my pal lent me a flat, but my god it was awful, and so are my kids."

[DistressedArea]

How much would I get for writing an article like this? Really want to get into it, seems like its pretty easy. Already got an idea for an article about an understairs cupboard, how much would I get for that do you think? Would I need a photo of the cupboard because I don't have one.

[Buelligan]

I'm afraid I don't think you can get paid for such an article, DistressedArea, unless you were born in Abovethelinecomments Land.  Sorry but you might as well throw yourself into the fucking road darling.  Hth.

[DistressedArea]

Would it help if I did a drawing of an understairs cupboard?

[Pink Gregory]

My kitchen's nicer than that, and my kitchen is half litter tray spillage and grease.

[DistressedArea]

Dead serious about this, if that poor disabled boy can earn money from that garbage, so can I. I must know how.

Willing to write about any room in the house, will also pretend to be married or in a relationship, or whatever.

[Buelligan]

Show us the drawing and we'll talk again.

Try to include some Orla Kiely printed cushions from John Lewis and a handwoven Provençal bag for life with copy of the Guardian just peeping out in the image.  Maybe a Roberts radio.

[DistressedArea]

Mate, you ever asked your mum if she knew Jeff Lynne? From the electric light orchestra, yeah?

I don't know, probably granite work surfaces, he had a few big hits. Just ask her yeah?